Hi. I am 14 and I am writing a novel called "The Haunted Town".
Read this extract:
"They are the goons", replied the old man rather unwillingly. He looked straight in the map, trying to figure out something. Suddenly they heard a low growl, no it wasn't Rover(their dog), they turned in surprise to see a dreadful scene. A Goon!!! He was standing at the entrance of the Dark tunnel. His body was a kind too dark with some patches of green revealing out from the stomach. He wore some torn clothes painted with blood, had a blood-stained knife in his left hand and.. and all above there were no eyes, instead there was an empty pit filled with moist blood. He again bellowed and ran towards the kids. The old man quickly took out a potion, a lush green kind and threw some on the figure. The knife dropped from his hands, he gazed hungrily straight towards James. In a few seconds, he fell down to his knees and with his mouth wide open, it twisted back like a maniac. And then..then blood flowed out of his mouth. "Yuck!! that's gross." Ema cried and hid her eyes behind her trembling hands. The goon then dropped to the ground as a rotten leaf. James and a other man went near it to check out if it had any "life" left. As James neared a little, the blood in the goon's eyes sparkled and in a fraction of second it held James tightly, with his nails piercing in his body. "help" James cried frantically.
The man quickly took a brown shaft, a holy one and ran towards the goon. But it was too late, the goon had already pierced hi teeth through his shoulder. The man quickly hit the goon with the shaft on his back. This time the goon rolled down, never to get up again. "Whew" James cried, trying to be brave and not show that how badly it was paining.
How was that?
Will it lead to a good teen horror novel?
Would you be terrified if you were reading it all alone at night?
Critique or improvement?
Thanx and reply soon please.
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