It happened little over 8 years ago. At first, I couldn’t get it out of my mind, but time has the tendency to cloud memories. I remember she was my little sister, whom I wanted to protect; I remember holding her when she needed a hug. When she was sad I’d comfort her, and try to get her to laugh. I remember when she sat in the back of my tricycle, laughing when the wind rushed by as i sped around the house. Among those memories is something more painful.
Earlier that day, I remember coming home from school, happy as always when she came to greet me. Her sweet laugh melted my heart, and she would pester me to come play with her. I was never in the mood. How I would give up anything to play with her for just one day. My father and brother were talking, mostly about school and how their days had gone. I’d join them eagerly and tell them what I learned that day. It was just a regular day, nothing special, no different than any other day.
My brother and I usually spent all our time together; I looked up to him and thought he was the best. She always looked up to me and told me I was “the beeeast”, and I would laugh at her attempt to say “the best”, but alas - she was only 3 years old. God, she was smart for a 3 year old; she would talk and ask questions among so many other things. My mother was always proud of how quickly she picked up the meaning of the words we used. Well, there were things she didn’t know understand, like how to ride a bike..or how to swim. That night changed me. That night was the night I finally, truly understood the meaning of the word “death”.
My father, brother, and I went out to go to the grocery store. Little did we know what was in store for us that night. We would usually take about an hour to gather all of the necessities, but that night, left the grocery store 45 minutes early. My brother and I knew nothing, but that look on my fathers face...that anguished look... It was an expression worn only by a person in absolute shock and sorrow. That expression told me that something had happened; something terrible.
We arrived at our house to find police cars parked at the front; I still didn’t understand what was going on. We saw our sister being questioned by an officer. Her face resembled my father's expression, and she seemed totally shocked. My brother picked up the pieces. “Bro, I think you should stay in the car,” he said, his voice grim as he told me.
I still did could not comprehend what has had happened. I looked to my brother again; this time tears were flowing from his eyes. My father told both of us to stay in the car. My brother wanted to say something, but the look my father gave him was enough to stop him. After what seemed like ages, my father came back into the car with tears streaming down his anguished face.
“I’m dropping you at your grandmother's,” he managed to say.
When we arrived at my grandmothers house, all my aunts where there - cousins too. At first I thought they were here to have a gathering like we always did on Thursdays, but today was a Tuesday and they were all crying. I was so confused; nothing made sense today. We sat in a room with all our cousins, crying they were, as was my brother. I still didn’t understand what was happening, so I just sat there looking at the wall wondering what could explain all of this.
Then, the weirdest thing happened. My aunt came into the room and walked up to me, her eyes bloodshot in the face of a saddened woman. “Your sister is with God now. She’s up in heaven now,” she said in a deathly whisper.
It suddenly hit me. Emotions coursed through me. I then knew, but wished I didn’t. I looked around - everyone was crying. As for myself, I didn’t cry; I was so shocked that my mind still didn’t comprehend what my emotions were telling me. I felt a deep hole in my heart, the hole that was my definition of death.
I can’t remember the date, just the day and how old she was. On a Tuesday, in the year of 2002, a little girl of 3 years drowned in a public pool. She was found facing downwards on the surface of the water when her sister discovered her. She was still alive which triggered little hope as the ambulance made a hurried attempt to get pump the water out of her chest. They weren’t successful.
On a Tuesday, in the year of 2002, I lost my little sister.
