Young Writers Society

The Ballad of the Dove

Verse 1:
The soft cooing of the dove
Turns louder and louder
She is locked into this cage
She just wonders,
Of how she got in,

Pre chorus:
She was wild, she was free
She missed it few times
But she wants to be released
No one has the right to keep her here

Chorus:
She says" I am the dove of love, I am the dove of peace
Would you let me released? Your capture is seething me
I am the dove of love. I am the dove of peace.
Why can't you see? Your cage is a sheath.
Inside of it its make me bleed"

Verse 2:
The cooing dove seething at night
She wants to fly high….Hiiigh to home
Home is a place she known with roses and blossoms
A place with valleys and rivers
A place she discovered, a place she saw
A place she felt safe into
A place she'd coo day and night
With no one for her to decide


Pre chorus:
She was wild, she was free
She missed it few times
But she wants to be released
No one has the right to keep her here

Chorus:
She says" I am the dove of love, I am the dove of peace
Would you let me released? Your capture is seething me
I am the dove of love. I am the dove of peace.
Why can't you see? Your cage is a sheath.
Inside of it its make me bleed"


Bridge:
At dawn when the sun is rising
And the wind is blowing her wings
She'd be free to see, free to rise
As an eagle flying with pride
In grace, in flawless…in softness
That's when …


Chorus:
She says" I am the dove of love, I am the dove of peace
Now I am finally released. Now I am free
I am the dove of love. I am the dove of peace.
I am the dove of love. I am the dove of peace.

Hiya the story is pretty, it just lacks a certain rhythm to it. I think perhaps the syllable count doesn't quite slot in to together so maybe sing/say the words out loud to yourself but accompany it with music and see where you can perhaps make it sound a little smoother.

A place with valleys and rivers
A place she discovered, a place she saw
A place she felt safe into
A place she'd coo day and night
With no one for her to decide

I especially felt this part was a little awkward. I really liked the repetition of "A place" but maybe have not as many lines of this and change the wording because "A place she felt safe into" sounds a bit odd after the shorter line of "A place she saw". Hope this helps a little Keep writing xXx

Hi there!

This was a cool song, although I found it a little confusing. I don't really understand what the message was, other than a dove is locked in a cage and she wants to be free. Maybe that's all it's supposed to be, but I felt like it was lacking something.

This happens with all of the songs that I read on here: I end up singing a tune for it in my head. This one was slow and sad, which is good since it's a ballad.

Overall, I liked it. Nice job.