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Young Writers Society


Here is Love (Forever and ever)



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12 Reviews



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Points: 1058
Reviews: 12
Fri Feb 11, 2011 9:53 pm
crestfallen says...



I think I’ve held you long enough
I think I’ve kept you high enough
I’m about to collapse now
I’m about to crumble down

Be glad I’ve held you for this long
Be glad I’ve kept you high this long
Are you sad you’ve collapsed me?
Are you sad I’ve crumbled down?

~Chorus~
Here’s love
This is not what I’ve imagined it to be
Here’s love
This is not what I’ve imagined I would be
Here’s love
This is not what I’ve imagined you would be
Here’s love
This is not where I’ve imagined we would be
Here’s love….love

I dream I’m able to let go
I know you’ve made the choice to go
Not about to let go now
Not about to back down now

Just be here within my own mind
For my acts are not always kind
Sad, you want to let go now
Sad, you want to back down now

(chorus)

All we ever do is think, and not think much
All we ever do is yell, and not care much
All we want to do is love, but love’s not us
All we ever, all we want
All we ever, all we want
All we want and all we ever
Forever and ever
Ever and forever
Forever and ever
Ever and forever

(chorus)

http://www.ourstage.com/tracks/AAHRVVOK ... orever-and
  





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12 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 1058
Reviews: 12
Fri Feb 11, 2011 10:03 pm
crestfallen says...



Can someone please tell me how to post these without the stupid double spacing..the first time I posted on this site it was fine but now all of a sudden everything I post is double spaced and no matter what I do I can't get it to stop.
  





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Mon Mar 14, 2011 1:46 am
Snoink says...



Okay! So, I edited your work to remove the double spacing. Basically, if you want to remove the double spacing, you edit your work, then you scroll down, past the text box. There should be a bit that says "special formatting." Make it from "poem" to "none." There should be no double spacing! Try it with the rest of your works! Also, if you have any questions, go bug a mod instead of posting it in your work. We try to see everything, but there is so much on YWS that we miss certain things. :)

As far as your lyrics go, while I don't know what the tune of for the song is, I rather like the repetition of "Here IS love" versus "Here's love." If it sounds better in the tune, I would definitely keep "Here is love."

Also, the first couple of verses sound a bit off, as far as the subject goes. How is this love? Or are you referring to the conditional love? It seems odd though, because while you refer to holding someone up, which implies a support of some kind, it seems unlike love in that it seems conditional. So, it sounds like you are giving up randomly. If the collapse has to do with a conflict or something, then I would probably state that somewhere!
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D
  








You know what the big problem is in telling fantasy and reality apart? They're both ridiculous.
— The 12th Doctor