poeting late at night again i really should stop procrastinating but somehow ideas escape me they're like [insert clever simile here] inspiration, where are you? you are my [metaphor] [adjective] [noun] [verb] [adverb] i should probably sleep now @_@
watching the sunset flood the sky with blooming pinks and oranges deep breaths, equilibrium and i listen to the soft guitar warm notes paint the air gentle smiles i want to bottle up this moment and savor it, keep it on the top shelf waiting for the sunlight to strike it with a crystal song
Hey NaPo buddy! Here to comment on your two latest poems! Let's start with @_@. This poem was very funny and charming! I really liked how you used brackets and put certain things you wanted to insert! Leaving them there was a great decision!
Now for melody! And this might just be me but I like to capitalize my titles. Though not capitalizing it does make it seem more loose and fun! I also really quickly wanted to ask you if I could use your color title idea and put some different colors on my titles. If you want to keep it exclusive to you I totally understand! Anyways back to the poem! This poem painted such a clear vivid picture! I'm sure this picture could be different for most but I personally saw the narrator on a hill watching an outstanding sunset while someone brought along strums notes on their guitar. I also really enjoyed the word crystal in the end. It brought it to such a nice close! Also, I know this is pretty long so if you would like me to spoiler it let me know!
"Writing is a place where you can be who you are."
Ahh Maple thanks so much for the comment, this brought a huge smile to my face!! ^-^ I super appreciate all the kind words, and no need to enspoiler it, I don't mind keeping my thread messy XD also YES you can use the color title idea!! I'm excited to see what you come up with while using it!!! :DDD
oh i meant to say --i mint to say-- that i wish i met you never
and oh man, i hope it's not mean but i find that your mien is rather mad and demeaning
so if you'll excuse me i have a meat to meet and to eat for my monday dinner
Spoiler! :
Just to clarify, the "you" isn't you, nor anyone else :P Lol and also for the "but i find that your mien / is rather mad and demeaning" part, I feel like the use of "mad" doesn't make much sense, but oh well! XD
rest your tired eyes my child sink into sighing sleep gentle and mild and leave behind your thoughts most wild fear not the toils of tomorrow and let your worries be exiled
you know, sometimes, i feel like titles should come at the end. for some poems it just kinda makes sense for readers to read first and let the title sum it up later. not to mention that when writing poems i tend to think of titles last. so anyways that’s why i think titles should come at the end. C:
colored scraps of paper floating gently to the floor i try to blow them up again but gravity is relentless and i am too weak to challenge its ever-constant presence.
i've always dreamed of flying but upon my waking would i be brave enough to let go?
i look up at all these poets above me, floating on their pedestals of dreams. feathered pens in hand they alternate between staring into space and scribbling madly on perfectly crinkled paper.
i look down at the muddy stone below me footprints and pathways leading to and away from where i'm standing. but there's no pathway up to those poets in the clouds. no ladder, staircase, or elevator inviting me to float among them.
if i want to become one of those exalted poets it seems i'll have to learn to fly.
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