Kept my attention until the very end, which is a rare thing. I'm not totally sure I like your style, but that's obviously a personal thing, because you're writing is good. It does actually sound like someone is talking to the reader, which is ually the best thing in first-person narratives. However, although it kept my attention, I think some of the events within the story were a little bit boring and nothing was there to relate to or think over. This passage seemed a little...pointless. Again though, that might be just me. Good job nonetheless.
Nate wrote:And if YWS ever does become a company, Jack will be the President of European Operations. In fact, I'm just going to call him that anyways.
Another good story . But filled with lots of typos.
I don't know if you already do this, but I find the best way to catch typos is to print the piece of, and then run through it a couple of times (marking down all the mistakes you notice with a pen).
EDIT: Oh yah, and I voted 'yes'. It sounds like a person with autism.
Actually what I have is very different from autism. I was very self-absorbed, but turned inward because of bad experiences, bullying and people reacting badly to unusual things I did. I chose not to interact and eventually forgot how. People with autism are born that way. If anything, I was hyper-aware of my reality, but it got obscured by fear, a very active imagination, and a negative attitude. I also never had too many language problems beyond learning to read a little slowly. If you were to give a name to my problem, it would be social anxiety disorder.
PS: This novel is what I call an "almost memoir," so this story actually did happen to me.
Please, sit down before you fall down.
Belloq, "Raiders of the Lost Ark"
We are not to simply bandage the wounds of victims beneath the wheels of injustice, we are to drive a spoke into the wheel itself. — Dietrich Bonhoeffer
. But filled with lots of typos.
