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The Code of Black: Pain in My Heart and Soul -chapter 1



What do you think of Talia Bourne?

A. Boring
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B. Sarcastic
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C. Pessimistic
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D. Mean
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E. Obnoxious
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F. Like-able
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G. Un-like-able
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H. Other
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Total votes : 1


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Tue Mar 15, 2011 8:16 pm
LadyFreeWill says...



Chapter One
-Talia Marie Bourne-
Brooklyn, New York City, USA Earth

One year ago…

“Stupid, stupid, stupid…” Talia grumbled, staring at the small television sitting on the kitchen counter.

“-is where he used to go to high school and where he and his father will now be visiting on Thursday.” The reporter finished saying before turning to the weather reporter.

“Oh please, Talia.” Gracie Jansen said, turning off the TV, “He’s handsome, and he’s coming to our school with his father”

“-who takes things from other places that don’t belong to him and-” Talia hissed.

“-You so have a crush on Jasper Solomon.” Gracie said, rolling her eyes.

“No, I do not. I can’t believe he’s even coming along with that artifact-stealing abomination …” Talia folded her arms and her upper lip pulled back, revealing her teeth that were naturally pointy.

“Save it for the press, Talia.” Gracie said, holding up her hand, “I’m sure they’ll want to hear all about it…”

“I feel very strongly about this.” Talia Bourne sniffed. Her best friend snorted loudly and erupted into loud laughter.

“Gracie, I resent your amusement.” Talia said.

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” Gracie said, still chortling, “Do you have anything to eat?”

Talia pulled a box of cereal out of the cupboard overhead and set it down forcefully in front of the other girl.
Gracie gazed sadly at the box of Cheerios and sighed, “Is there anything better to eat?”
“No.”

“Is this because I laughed at you?”

“No.”


“Then why are you sounding like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you’re mad at me.”

“I’m not.”

“Really?”

“Uh huh.”

“Then can I have something else to eat?”

“No.”

Gracie sighed once again but reached out and grabbed the cereal. She scraped her chair closer to the counter and opened the cereal box as she looked down at a thick textbook lying open on the countertop. “S’fine then. Let’s review for the quiz.”

“Sure. Quiz away.” Talia said, leaning forward and putting her chin in her hand, “I hate math.” She added under her breath.
****

“Move out of my way!” it was Thursday afternoon. Students were running into each other, trying to get to the auditorium early to get a front seat or running toward the front entrance where it was rumored the two important guests were just arriving.

“Come on!” Gracie exclaimed, pulling Talia down the hall, “I bet they’re in the office talking with the principal!”

“No!” Talia said, pulling her arm free, “I’m not going run around like an idiot, trying to get a glimpse of the back of someone’s head.”

“Oh come on, please! Oh no, Lillian’s going toward the office! Oh, oh please! Oh Talia, I really want to see him! Oh can we? Oh please?”

“Say ‘oh’ one more time, and I’m going to puke.” Talia said, “Let’s go to the auditorium. You’ll be able to see him there, too.”

“Oh, but Talia!” Gracie whined.

Talia scowled and snapped, “Fine, go by yourself. You can take a picture and maybe a newspaper will buy it from you.”

Gracie hurried off by herself and Talia headed another way to the auditorium.

Unfortunately, halfway down the hall, she was trampled by a horde of seniors, “Watch it!” she shouted after them, “You shouldn’t be so eager to see Jasper Solomon because he probably doesn’t wanna see any of YOU!”

The assembly was about to start when Talia reached the auditorium. Realizing she wouldn’t be missed, Talia walked right past the doors to the now-packed room, intent on not being anywhere near Thomas Solomon or his son.

She walked around the school, dodging past a few of the faculty who weren’t attending the assembly and ended up wandering into the gym. But there was already someone sitting on the bleachers.

“Hey.” She said, climbing up and taking seat next to him. “Skipping the assembly, too, huh?”

“Yep.” The boy said. Actually, he looked sort of older –maybe a senior who got held back?

“Are you a senior?” Talia asked blankly.

“No.” he said looking pretty amused at the thought.

“Oh. So what are you doing here?”

“I’m here for the assembly.”

“Then why aren’t you there?”

“All the girls are too overwhelming. And annoying.” The guy said.

“Yeah. And they aren’t even excited about Thomas Solomon… only the computer freaks are. The rest just
want to see Jasper Solomon.” Talia made a noise of disgust, “And they don’t even realize how horrible his dad is! And Jasper Solomon isn’t that great, either!”

The boy looked sideways at Talia and asked, “What’s your name?”

“Talia.”

“I’m guessing you don’t like the Solomons, Talia?”

“Was I that obvious? I mean, the dad’s selfish and destructive, the son’s stuck up and spoiled, and the girl is… well, she’s okay.” Talia managed to not get pumped up, realizing that giving an almost total stranger a passionate lecture would not be the best way to make friends.

“I actually know for a fact that Jasper Solomon is not spoiled. His father keeps all the money to himself.”

“Whatever. I’m not talking about this anymore. It just gets me worked up.” Talia huffed, leaning back on next seat.

She glanced sideways at the guy next to her. His hair was jet black against his white skin and he had a bit of facial hair going on; the rugged-hot-look guys were always trying to imitate these days. Except he could actually pull it off. His eyes were cold black and the grim look on his face looked set in.

A little while passed and Talia asked suddenly, “What do you think is going on in the auditorium right now?”
“Everyone’s probably wondering where I am.” The boy said.
Talia looked at him incredulously and said, “What? Why?”

He turned to look at Talia, a crooked smile spreading across his face, “I’m sorry. I haven’t properly introduced myself… Hi, my name is Jasper Solomon.”

Talia’s mouth dropped open and she finally managed to say, “Ooh… that was embarrassing. Jeez, I knew you looked familiar… Omigosh –how did I not recognize you? Y’look a lot different on magazines. ” That would explain the sad eyes; his mother had died in a car accident just a few months ago. He had been the one to survive it.

Solomon did not say anything and Talia said, “But I’m not taking back anything I said. Just cause you’re you, doesn’t mean my words don’t mean what they did when you weren’t you.”

“What?”

“I believe deep, deep down, you know what I’m saying.” Talia said, looking at the ceiling. Where the fuck did that come from? Why the hell would he know what she was saying?

“I do know what you’re saying.” Solomon said after a moment.

“Good.” That means I don’t look like a complete idiot, Talia thought.

“Okay.” Talia paused and asked suddenly, “do you have a girlfriend?”

“Not at the moment.” He said easily, looking at her sideways in a way that was really arrogant and super… charming!

Talia felt her heart flutter.

“Oh. Because that way I can tell my friend. She has a huge major crush on you.”

“I see.” Solomon said, looking back to the middle of the empty gym.

Talia looked at the clock. When the minute hand had ticked by five minutes, she asked randomly, “Can you really play the piano and sing as good as… they say?”

“It depends on how good they say I can.” Solomon replied.

“Oh-kay.” Thanks for the straight answer.

Solomon sighed and shook back his sleeve to check the time, “I should really go to the auditorium. As much as I despise my father, I’d hate for everyone to fall asleep.”

“I guess I’ll go, too.” Talia said, following him down the bleachers.

“Why?” he asked, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, “I thought you didn’t like the Solomon’s.”

“Well, I don’t, but it’ll help me write my editorial for the school newspaper about your dad’s horrible work if I get some actual quotes.” Talia lied easily. Well it wasn’t exactly a lie –she really did write for the school newspaper but she wasn’t thinking about writing an expose on Thomas Solomon’s work. Seriously, she wondered, why was she going to the stinking auditorium?

Oh no! I’m getting infected by the guy’s stupid looks! Must prevent future-crush-on-Jasper-Solomon symptoms! Talia thought to herself.

“Good idea.” Solomon said, and Talia wasn’t sure if he was being sarcastic or not. Anyway, it answered both her thoughts and what she had said.

When they arrived at the closed auditorium doors, Solomon took Talia’s hand and scribbled something down on it with a pen from his pocket.

“What’s this for?” Talia asked, looking at it, JasperAntonio@Solomon.net?”

“It’s my email address. I want you to send me a copy when you finish your editorial.”

“Oh.” Talia looked down at the spiky handwriting and let her hand fall to her side again, “I’ll make sure I do that.”

Solomon laughed and said, “Wow. You’re cute, kid.” He opened the door to the auditorium, winked, and slipped inside.

Wait –he winked? Whoa; this was too much. He laughed and winked and called her cute.

Talia followed him in and slipped in a very back-row seat.

People were noticing Solomon as he walked right down the middle of the aisle to the stage. Talk about grand entrances…

“And there’s my son!” Thomas Solomon said cheerfully, breaking off mid-sentence.

There was a thunder of clapping and many girls jumped to their feet and called out to him. Solomon grinned and waved as he stepped onto the stage.

He’s such a fake, Talia decided. His smile was forced. Then she looked down at her hand again. She rubbed at the words, smearing it into black smudges of ink. But it was too late for forgetting what it had said. Talia scowled at the handsome, smiling man on the stage. He was so totally pretending to be like that, she thought bitterly.
Faker. Faker. Faker. Faker. Faker…

Solomon stepped up to the microphone, said a few things and then left the stage again to thundering applause.

A few girls called, “Sit over here!” and waved to him, but he just smiled and walked to the back and plopped down in the seat next to Talia. Talia scowled and leaned away, resting her head in her hand.

For the rest of the assembly, Talia believed all that Thomas Solomon saw were the back of everyone’s heads.


“Oh my gosh, Talia, I am so jealous!” Gracie exclaimed when they saw each other again after school ended.

“Uh… why?” Talia wondered.

“You were sitting next to him!”

“Who? When?”

“Jasper Solomon!” Gracie squealed, “He was totally sitting next to you during the assembly! Oh my gosh, I totally, like, SAW you!”

“Really?” Talia said sarcastically, “then maybe you would’ve seen the look on my face.”

“But you were sitting next to Solomon!” Gracie said a little too loudly.

Some of Talia’s other female classmates appeared almost out of thin air at these words.

They pestered her with questions –Did he say anything? Was any part of him touching her? Did he look at her? What did he smell like?

“For God’s sake!” Talia cried out, trying to get out the front door but getting stopped by other girls who wanted to ask her about the handsome Solomon, “Unlike YOU, I wasn’t watching him with my mouth hanging open like an idiot!”

She ran down the front steps and got on the bus before she could be ambushed with more questions.

Once she was at home in the apartment she and her usually absent mother shared, Talia leaned back against the kitchen counter and thought about the day’s events. She had Jasper Solomon’s email address. She should definitely email him and say something really clever. “Oh no.” Talia whispered to herself, “Oh no.”

She ran for the phone. She hit speed dial and waited desperately for Gracie to pick up.

“Hello?”

“Gracie!” Talia exclaimed, clutching the phone for dear life.

“Yeah? Wait, Talia, you do know we just saw each other less that an hour ago, right?”

“Yes, but I’m really confused right now!”

“Why?”

“You know how I was sitting in the back of the auditorium?” Talia asked.

“Yeah! I was totally saving a seat for you in the third row, though!”

“I was going to skip the whole thing, but…” Talia explained quickly what had happened, “… and then he wrote his email
address on my hand and he said I was cute. Gracie, I’m lost here!”

There was silence on the other end.

“Gracie? Hello?” Talia said uncertainly.

“Yeah. Okay. I’m on my way, Talia. We have a lot to do.”

“Sure, but what are we doing?” Talia asked.

“Studying.”

****


“…Which means you email him the editorial, but you just act like yourself. If you get all giggly or something he’ll lose interest.” Gracie explained, circling Talia who sat in the middle of the kitchen, perched on a high stool.

“Yeah… or he’ll lose inter- wait! What?” Talia stopped, “What d’you mean? Why would I want his interest?”

“Well you like him, don’t you?” Gracie asked, pausing as she paced.

“Hell no! He’s father is a monster and he isn’t any better!” But Talia wasn’t sure about the first part. She didn’t like
him, right?

“Au contraire!” Gracie exclaimed in a really bad accent. She stooped down next to Talia, “That was before you
met Jasper Solomon.”

“Oh, and now that I’ve met him I’m supposed to have fallen head over heals in love with him? Uh-uh, I don’t think so!” Talia said indignantly, jumping to her feet.

“Then don’t think!” Gracie said dreamily, “just… Do!”

“Okaaaaaay… I think one of us has read one too many romance novels.” Talia snorted.

“No really. You have to email him. You know those movies where the friend convinces the girl to play hard to
get?” Gracie asked, straightening up, “Well it always ends up not working and the guy figures the girl just isn’t interested, right? So I’m not going to be the friend who gives bad advice-”

“-but I’m not interested.” Talia interrupted.

“Sure. Yeah. What’s that they say these days? Oh, that’s it –yeah RIIIGHT!” Gracie said forcefully.

“Yes, it is right.” Talia said, smirking.

“Oh, wow; so funny. Don’t be plucky with me!”

“Plucky?” Talia said incredulously, “That’s totally not the right word –d’you even know what that means?”

“Sure, it means… like, smart-alecky, right?” Gracie said dismissively.

“Wrong.”

“Whatever, point is, you like Solomon, you email Solomon, and you go out with Solomon… sometime in the future.”

“But don’t you like him? And besides, he’s, like, thirty-five.”

“Twenty-one.” Gracie corrected, “And I’ve moved on. I totally met the cutest guy in the world after the assembly. So, as
you can see, I’m good. But you on the other hand-”

“-should not have called you.” Talia said, “I don’t know what I was thinking. I’ll just send him a copy of the
article once I’m finished. There’s nothing complicated about that.”

“But-!”

Talia herded Gracie towards the door, “Yes, you can give me the details about your new sweetheart tomorrow.
Okay, thank you! Buh-bye!” And she shut the door on her friend.

“What! Talia! Open the door!” Gracie yelled, her voice muffled from the door. “Do you know what these
sudden mood swings you’re experiencing could mean?! I saw on TV it’s because you’re going through times of mental
difficulty! You have to consult your feelings with someone or you’ll get all bottled up and get depressed! Talia! Open the door! We’re talking suicide here!”

Talia snorted with amusement and went to her computer to start on her article for the school paper.

Three and a half hours later, she sent the article to the editor of the school newspaper and then one to Jasper
Solomon himself.

She clicked send and stared at her inbox. She checked her email account periodically for twenty minutes until… Solomon replied.

She was about to click the message but didn’t. Should she do it? Well, she could read it and then reply later and that way, he wouldn’t think she was eager or anything –because she wasn’t.

“Oh what the heck!” Talia grumbled, “I don’t like him. He’s arrogant and fake. It’s so obvious. Why am I acting like all those other girls at school? Just do it, Talia! Click it-!”

And she did.

Wow, it said,

I love how you described my father’s speech. And how sweet –you even added a picture. Have you ever
considered being a writer?


Talia hit reply before she even thought about it and wrote a quick reply.

Oh, so now Jasper Solomon is giving me career advice. What next?


She reread it a few times to make sure it was casual and indifferent before she pressed SEND.
It was now near seven o’clock, and Talia had to start her homework, but instead of going to the kitchen table, she took her things to her room with her laptop and set to work while keeping an eye on her email inbox.

So sad –how she had become just another one of those girls with a huge crush on Jasper Solomon. Yes, he was handsome, but he was also cool, smart, and charming all mixed up together. Everything Talia had always wanted in a boy.

Man.

Whatever.

Over the next two hours, Solomon and Talia exchanged multiple emails. They went a little like this:


Solomon: I should have my father see this.


Talia: I don’t want him to sue me.


Solomon: My sister thought it was hilarious.


Talia: Your sister read it?


Solomon: yeah. Is there a problem with that?


Talia: No, not really.


Solomon: uh huh. Sure.


Talia: what’s your sister’s name again?


Solomon: Sal


Talia: Oh. I knew that.


After that, Talia never heard another word from Solomon.

****

“You look tired.” Gracie said and Talia dumped her lunch tray on the table and sat down.

“I am. I went to bed at really late.”

“Really? I didn’t think the homework was that bad.”

“Who said I was doing homework?”

“Oh. So did you finish your editorial yet?”

“Yep. Jason thought it was great. He said it would be the ‘best article in the paper’. Like he doesn’t tell that to everyone
who writes a piece…”

“Like, aren’t editors supposed to be picky?” Gracie agreed, taking a huge bite into her pizza, “And everyone’s
still talking about yesterday.”

“I’m surprised you aren’t.”

“Like I said, I met this boy.”

“Oh yeah.” Talia remembered vaguely.

“He’s a senior, you know. His name is Frederick.”

“That’s great.” Talia said unenthusiastically, picking at the bread of her sandwich.

“Okay, fine. Did you email you-know-who?” Gracie asked, lowering her voice.

“Uh, Gracie… you can say you-know-who’s name, y’know.” Talia said, rolling her eyes, “And yes, I did.”

“Did he reply or anything?”

“Uh…” Talia said, choosing not to answer.

“He did, didn’t he?”

“I dunno.”

“Talia!” Gracie exclaimed, “What did he say?”

“I dunno.”

“Was it positive?”

“I dunno.”

“It wasn’t? Oh no! Is he gonna sue you?!” Gracie asked anxiously.

“I dun-”

“Stop! Answer me seriously!” Gracie said.

“Okay.” Talia said, putting a whole nacho chip in her mouth and crunching down.

“Jeez!” Gracie said in disgust, “Eat like you have a secret!”

Talia shrugged and stuffed a stack of three more chips into her mouth and said, “I’m bad at keeping secrets. They eat
me alive.”

“So you indulge in eating?” Gracie asked, wrinkling her nose.

“I’m one hundred and nine pounds and I eat day and night.” Talia said lightly.

“Anyway,” Said Gracie, shaking her head, “What did Solomon say?”

“He didn’t say anything.”

“Fine –what he emailed!” Gracie corrected, “Stop evading!”

“Okay. Fine; He said he likes it.”

“What were his exact words?!”

“Um, it said something like ‘I love the way you describe my dad’s speech’… and yeah.”

“And you talked to him yesterday, too, right? What’d he say then?”

“Gracie, can you drop it? Please? Besides, I already told you.”

“So? Tell me again! You are on speaking terms with a rich, famous, totally gorgeous guy! I want details!”

“Hm…Well, he doesn’t have a girlfriend and –oh! I think the bell’s gonna ring soon.” Talia said, getting up with her tray.

“We still have fifteen minutes!”

“Yeah, well –gotta go!” She waved and did some artful dodging to leave the cafeteria in what should’ve been a world-
record.
Last edited by LadyFreeWill on Thu Mar 17, 2011 7:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Formerly TheScratchMan.





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Thu Mar 17, 2011 1:28 am
ElementalBlood says...



Gah O_O

I did the same thing when I first started posting, leave a full space between every new paragraph. It's cramped and difficult to read otherwise.

Too much speech with little or no reason. There's so much, I can't keep up! O_O Well, that might just be the lack of spaces.

You've left me confused, why does Talia hate the Solomons? We really get that she doesn't like them, but why? And why would only the techs be paying attention to him? Plus that bit where Talia asks Jasper if he can sing/play piano came out of nowhere. Put more explanation in the beginning. We readers wanna follow but we can't understand what's going on! Throw us a lifeline?

All it takes is some editing ^_^

Blood
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Sun Mar 27, 2011 5:52 pm
TheTruthLiesWithin says...



Hello! Happy review day! I'm Truth and I shall review your novel today :)
Let's start!

TheScratchMan wrote:Chapter One
-Talia Marie Bourne-
Brooklyn, New York City, USA Earth

One year ago…

“Stupid, stupid, stupid…” Talia grumbled, staring at the small television sitting on the kitchen counter.

“-is where he used to go to high school and where he and his father will now be visiting on Thursday, comma” The reporter finished saying before turning to the weather reporter.

“Oh please, Talia, comma” Gracie Jansen said, turning off the TV, “He’s handsome, and he’s coming to our school with his father” I will not put them everywhere but there should be a comma between the narration and the dialogue, and not periods.

“-who takes things from other places that don’t belong to him and-” Talia hissed.

“-You so have a crush on Jasper Solomon.” Gracie said, rolling her eyes.

“No, I do not. I can’t believe he’s even coming along with that artifact-stealing abomination …” Talia folded her arms and her upper lip pulled back, revealing her teeth that were unnaturally pointy. Did you mean unnaturally? As in they more pointy than normal?

“Save it for the press, Talia.” Gracie said, holding up her hand, “I’m sure they’ll want to hear all about it…”

“I feel very strongly about this.” Talia Bourne sniffed. Her best friend snorted loudly and erupted into loud laughter.

“Gracie, I resent your amusement.” Talia said.

“Yeah, sure, whatever,” Gracie said, still chortling, “Do you have anything to eat?”

Talia pulled a box of cereal out of the cupboard overhead, comma and set it down forcefully in front of the other girl.
Gracie gazed sadly at the box of Cheerios and sighed, “Is there anything better to eat?”
“No.”

“Is this because I laughed at you?”

“No.”

“Then why are you sounding like that?”

“Like what?”

“Like you’re mad at me.”

“I’m not.”

“Really?”

“Uh huh.”

“Then can I have something else to eat?”

“No.”

Gracie sighed once again but reached out and grabbed the cereal. She scraped her chair closer to the counter and opened the cereal box as she looked down at a thick textbook lying open on the countertop. “S’fine then. Let’s review for the quiz.”

“Sure. Quiz away.” Talia said, leaning forward and putting her chin in her hand, “I hate math.” She added under her breath.
****

“Move out of my way!” it was Thursday afternoon. Students were running into each other, trying to get to the auditorium early to get a front seat, comma or running toward the front entrance, comma where it was rumored the two important guests were just arriving.

“Come on!” Gracie exclaimed, pulling Talia down the hall, “I bet they’re in the office talking with the principal!”

“No!” Talia said, pulling her arm free, “I’m not going run around like an idiot, trying to get a glimpse of the back of someone’s head.”

“Oh come on, please! Oh no, Lillian’s going toward the office! Oh, oh please! Oh Talia, I really want to see him! Oh can we? Oh please?”

“Say ‘oh’ one more time, and I’m going to puke.” Talia said, “Let’s go to the auditorium. You’ll be able to see him there, too.”

“Oh, but Talia!” Gracie whined.

Talia scowled and snapped, “Fine, go by yourself. You can take a picture and maybe a newspaper will buy it from off of you.”

Gracie hurried off by herself and Talia headed another way, comma to the auditorium.

Unfortunately, halfway down the hall, she was trampled by a horde of seniors, “Watch it!” she shouted after them, “You shouldn’t be so eager to see Jasper Solomon because he probably doesn’t wanna see any of YOU!”

The assembly was about to start when Talia reached the auditorium. Realizing she wouldn’t be missed, Talia walked right past the doors of the now-packed room, intent on not being anywhere near Thomas Solomon or his son. Do you mean she passed the doors without getting in? If so, then it should be 'past the doors of the now-packed...'

She walked around the school, dodging past a few of the faculty who weren’t attending the assembly and ended up wandering into the gym. But there was already someone sitting on the bleachers.

“Hey.” She said, climbing up and taking seat next to him. “Skipping the assembly, too, huh?”

“Yep.” The boy said. Actually, he looked sort of older –maybe a senior who got held back?

“Are you a senior?” Talia asked blankly.

“No.” he said looking pretty amused at the thought.

“Oh. So what are you doing here?”

“I’m here for the assembly.”

“Then why aren’t you there?”

“All the girls are too overwhelming. And annoying.” The guy said.

“Yeah. And they aren’t even excited about Thomas Solomon… only the computer freaks are. The rest just
want to see Jasper Solomon.” Talia made a noise of disgust, “And they don’t even realize how horrible his dad is! And Jasper Solomon isn’t that great, either!”

The boy looked sideways at Talia and asked, “What’s your name?”

“Talia.”

“I’m guessing you don’t like the Solomons, Talia?”

“Was I that obvious? I mean, the Dad’s selfish and destructive, the son’s stuck up and spoiled, and the girl is… well, she’s okay.” Talia managed to not get pumped up, realizing that giving an almost total stranger a passionate lecture would not be the best way to make friends.

“I actually know for a fact that Jasper Solomon is not spoiled. His father keeps all the money to himself.”

“Whatever. I’m not talking about this anymore. It just gets me worked up.” Talia huffed, leaning back on next seat.

She glanced sideways at the guy next to her. His hair was jet black against his white skin and he had a bit of facial hair going on; the rugged-hot-look guys were always trying to imitate these days. Except he could actually pull it off. His eyes were cold black and the grim look on his face looked set in.

A little while passed and Talia asked suddenly, “What do you think is going on in the auditorium right now?”
“Everyone’s probably wondering where I am.” The boy said.
Talia looked at him incredulously and said, “What? Why?”

He turned to look at Talia, a crooked smile spreading across his face, “I’m sorry. I haven’t properly introduced myself… Hi, my name is Jasper Solomon.”

Talia’s mouth dropped open and she finally managed to say, “Ooh… that's embarrassing. Jeez, I knew you looked familiar… Omigosh –how did I not recognize you? Y’look a lot different on magazines. ” That would explain the sad eyes; his mother had died in a car accident just a few months ago. He had been the only? one to survive it.

Solomon did not say anything stayed silent and Talia said, “But I’m not taking back anything I said. Just cause you’re you, doesn’t mean my words don’t mean what they did when you weren’t you.”

“What?”

“I believe deep, deep down, you know what I’m saying.” Talia said, looking at the ceiling. Where the fuck did that come from? Why the hell would he know what she was saying?

“I do know what you’re saying.” Solomon said after a moment.

“Good.” That means I don’t look like a complete idiot, Talia thought.

“Okay.” Talia paused and asked suddenly, “do you have a girlfriend?”

“Not at the moment.” He said easily, looking at her sideways in a way that was really arrogant and super… charming!

Talia felt her heart flutter.

“Oh. Because that way I can tell my friend. She has a huge major crush on you.”

“I see.” Solomon said, looking back to the middle of the empty gym.

Talia looked at the clock. When the minute hand had ticked by five minutes, she asked randomly, “Can you really play the piano and sing as good as… they say?”

“It depends on how good they say I can.” Solomon replied.

“Oh-kay.” Thanks for the straight answer , comma she tought.

Solomon sighed and shook back his sleeve to check the time, “I should really go to the auditorium. As much as I despise my father, I’d hate for everyone to fall asleep.”

“I guess I’ll go, too.” Talia said, following him down the bleachers.

“Why?” he asked, a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth, “I thought you didn’t like the Solomon’s.”

“Well, I don’t, but it’ll help me write my editorial for the school newspaper about your dad’s horrible work if I get some actual quotes.” Talia lied easily. Well it wasn’t exactly a lie –she really did write for the school newspaper but she wasn’t thinking about writing an exposé on Thomas Solomon’s work. Seriously, she wondered, why was she going to the stinking auditorium?

Oh no! I’m getting infected by the guy’s stupid looks! Must prevent future-crush-on-Jasper-Solomon symptoms! Talia thought to herself.

“Good idea.” Solomon said, and Talia wasn’t sure if he was being sarcastic or not. Anyway, it answered both her thoughts and what she had said.

When they arrived at the closed auditorium doors, Solomon took Talia’s hand and scribbled something down on it with a pen from his pocket.

“What’s this for?” Talia asked, looking at it, JasperAntonio@Solomon.net?”

“It’s my email address. I want you to send me a copy when you finish your editorial.”

“Oh.” Talia looked down at the spiky handwriting and let her hand fall to her side again, “I’ll make sure I do that.”

Solomon laughed and said, “Wow. You’re cute, kid.” He opened the door to the auditorium, winked, and slipped inside.

Wait –he winked? Whoa; this was too much. He laughed and winked and had called her cute.

Talia followed him in and slipped in a very back-row seat.

People were noticing Solomon as he walked right down the middle of the aisle to the stage. Talk about grand entrances…

“And there’s my son!” Thomas Solomon said cheerfully, breaking off mid-sentence.

There was a thunder of clapping and many girls jumped to their feet and called out to him. Solomon grinned and waved as he stepped onto the stage.

He’s such a fake, Talia decided. His smile was forced. Then she looked down at her hand again. She rubbed at the words, smearing it into black smudges of ink. But it was too late for forgetting what it had said. Talia scowled at the handsome, smiling man on the stage. He was so totally pretending to be like that, she thought bitterly.
Faker. Faker. Faker. Faker. Faker…

Solomon stepped up to the microphone, said a few things and then left the stage again to thundering applause.

A few girls called, “Sit over here!” and waved to him, but he just smiled and walked to the back and plopped down in the seat next to Talia. Talia scowled and leaned away, resting her head in her hand.

For the rest of the assembly, Talia believed all that Thomas Solomon saw were the back of everyone’s heads.


“Oh my gosh, Talia, I am so jealous!” Gracie exclaimed when they saw each other again after school ended.

“Uh… why?” Talia wondered.

“You were sitting next to him!”

“Who? When?”

“Jasper Solomon!” Gracie squealed, “He was totally sitting next to you during the assembly! Oh my gosh, I totally, like, SAW you!”

“Really?” Talia said sarcastically, “then maybe you would’ve seen the look on my face.”

“But you were sitting next to Solomon!” Gracie said a little too loudly.

Some of Talia’s other female classmates appeared almost out of thin air at these words.

They pestered her with questions –Did he say anything? Was any part of him touching her? Did he look at her? What did he smell like?

“For God’s sake!” Talia cried out, trying to get out the front door but getting stopped by other girls who wanted to ask her about the handsome Solomon, “Unlike YOU, I wasn’t watching him with my mouth hanging open like an idiot!”

She ran down the front steps and got on the bus before she could be ambushed with more questions.

Once she was at home in the apartment she and her usually absent mother shared, Talia leaned back against the kitchen counter and thought about the day’s events. She had Jasper Solomon’s email address. She should definitely email him and say something really clever. “Oh no.” Talia whispered to herself, “Oh no.”

She ran for the phone. She hit speed dial and waited desperately for Gracie to pick up.

“Hello?”

“Gracie!” Talia exclaimed, clutching the phone for dear life.

“Yeah? Wait, Talia, you do know we just saw each other less that an hour ago, right?”

“Yes, but I’m really confused right now!”

“Why?”

“You know how I was sitting in the back of the auditorium?” Talia asked.

“Yeah! I was totally saving a seat for you in the third row, though!”

“I was going to skip the whole thing, but…” Talia explained quickly what had happened, “… and then he wrote his email
address on my hand and he said I was cute. Gracie, I’m lost here!”

There was silence on the other end.

“Gracie? Hello?” Talia said uncertainly.

“Yeah. Okay. I’m on my way, Talia. We have a lot to do.”

“Sure, but what are we doing?” Talia asked.

“Studying.”

****


“…Which means you email him the editorial, but you just act like yourself. If you get all giggly or something he’ll lose interest.” Gracie explained, circling Talia who sat in the middle of the kitchen, perched on a high stool.

“Yeah… or he’ll lose inter- wait! What?” Talia stopped, “What d’you mean? Why would I want his interest?”

“Well you like him, don’t you?” Gracie asked, pausing as she paced.

“Hell no! His father is a monster, comma and he isn’t any better!” But Talia wasn’t sure about the first part. She didn’t like him, right?

“Au contraire!” Gracie exclaimed in a really bad accent. She stooped down next to Talia, “That was before you
met Jasper Solomon.”

“Oh, and now that I’ve met him I’m supposed to have fallen head over heals in love with him? Uh-uh, I don’t think so!” Talia said indignantly, jumping to her feet.

“Then don’t think!” Gracie said dreamily, “just… Do!”

“Okaaaaaay… I think one of us has read one too many romance novels.” Talia snorted.

“No, comma really. You have to email him. You know those movies where the friend convinces the girl to play hard to get?” Gracie asked, straightening up, “Well it always ends up not working and the guy figures the girl just isn’t interested, right? So I’m not going to be the friend who gives bad advice-”

“-but I’m not interested.” Talia interrupted.

“Sure. Yeah. What’s that they say these days? Oh, that’s it –yeah RIIIGHT!” Gracie said forcefully.

“Yes, it is right.” Talia said, smirking.

“Oh, wow; so funny. Don’t be plucky with me!”

“Plucky?” Talia said incredulously, “That’s totally not the right word –d’you even know what that means?”

“Sure, it means… like, smart-alecky, right?” Gracie said dismissively.

“Wrong.”

“Whatever, point is, you like Solomon, you e-mail Solomon, and you go out with Solomon… sometime in the future.”

“But don’t you like him? And besides, he’s, like, thirty-five.”

“Twenty-one.” Gracie corrected, “And I’ve moved on. I totally met the cutest guy in the world after the assembly. So, as
you can see, I’m good. But you on the other hand-”

“-should not have called you.” Talia said, “I don’t know what I was thinking. I’ll just send him a copy of the
article once I’m finished. There’s nothing complicated about that.”

“But-!”

Talia herded Gracie towards the door, “Yes, you can give me the details about your new sweetheart tomorrow.
Okay, thank you! Buh-bye!” And she shut the door on her friend.

“What! Talia! Open the door!” Gracie yelled, her voice muffled from the door. “Do you know what these
sudden mood swings you’re experiencing could mean?! I saw on TV it’s because you’re going through times of mental
difficulty! You have to consult your feelings with someone or you’ll get all bottled up and get depressed! Talia! Open the door! We’re talking suicide here!”

Talia snorted with amusement and went to her computer to start on her article for the school paper.

Three and a half hours later, she sent the article to the editor of the school newspaper and then one to Jasper
Solomon himself.

She clicked send and stared at her inbox. She checked her email account periodically for twenty minutes until… Solomon replied.

She was about to click the message but didn’t. Should she do it? Well, she could read it and then reply later and that way, he wouldn’t think she was eager or anything –because she wasn’t.

“Oh what the heck!” Talia grumbled, “I don’t like him. He’s arrogant and fake. It’s so obvious. Why am I acting like all those other girls at school? Just do it, Talia! Click it-!”

And she did.

Wow, it said,

I love how you described my father’s speech. And how sweet –you even added a picture. Have you ever
considered being a writer?
Here, I'd change the font just so it's clear that it's the e-mail.

Talia hit reply before she even thought about it and wrote a quick reply.

Oh, so now Jasper Solomon is giving me career advice. What next?


She reread it a few times to make sure it was casual and indifferent before she pressed SEND.
It was now near seven o’clock, and Talia had to start her homework, but instead of going to the kitchen table, she took her things to her room with her laptop and set to work while keeping an eye on her email inbox.

So sad –how she had become just another one of those girls with a huge crush on Jasper Solomon. Yes, he was handsome, but he was also cool, smart, and charming all mixed up together. Everything Talia had always wanted in a boy.

Man.

Whatever.

Over the next two hours, Solomon and Talia exchanged multiple emails. They went a little like this:


Solomon: I should have my father see this.


Talia: I don’t want him to sue me.


Solomon: My sister thought it was hilarious.


Talia: Your sister read it?


Solomon: yeah. Is there a problem with that?


Talia: No, not really.


Solomon: uh huh. Sure.


Talia: what’s your sister’s name again?


Solomon: Sal


Talia: Oh. I knew that.


After that, Talia never heard another word from Solomon.

****

“You look tired.” Gracie said whenTalia dumped her lunch tray on the table and sat down.

“I am. I went to bed at really late.”

“Really? I didn’t think the homework was that bad.”

“Who said I was doing homework?”

“Oh. So did you finish your editorial yet?”

“Yep. Jason thought it was great. He said it would be the ‘best article in the paper’. Like he doesn’t tell that to everyone
who writes a piece…”

“Like, aren’t editors supposed to be picky?” Gracie agreed, taking a huge bite of her pizza, “And everyone’s still talking about yesterday.”

“I’m surprised you aren’t.”

“Like I said, I met this boy.”

“Oh yeah.” Talia remembered vaguely.

“He’s a senior, you know. His name is Frederick.”

“That’s great.” Talia said unenthusiastically, picking at the bread of her sandwich.

“Okay, fine. Did you email you-know-who?” Gracie asked, lowering her voice.

“Uh, Gracie… you can say you-know-who’s name, y’know.” Talia said, rolling her eyes, “And yes, I did.”

“Did he reply or anything?”

“Uh…” Talia said, choosing not to answer.

“He did, didn’t he?”

“I dunno.”

“Talia!” Gracie exclaimed, “What did he say?”

“I dunno.”

“Was it positive?”

“I dunno.”

“It wasn’t? Oh no! Is he gonna sue you?!” Gracie asked anxiously.

“I dun-”

“Stop! Answer me seriously!” Gracie said.

“Okay.” Talia said, putting a whole nacho chip in her mouth and crunching down.

“Jeez!” Gracie said in disgust, “Eat like you have a secret!”

Talia shrugged and stuffed a stack of three more chips into her mouth and said, “I’m bad at keeping secrets. They eat
me alive.”

“So you indulge in eating?” Gracie asked, wrinkling her nose.

“I’m one hundred and nine pounds and I eat day and night.” Talia said lightly. Damn, I wish I would stay 109 pounds eating like that.

“Anyway,” Said Gracie, shaking her head, “What did Solomon say?”

“He didn’t say anything.”

“Fine –what he emailed!” Gracie corrected, “Stop evading!”

“Okay. Fine; He said he likes it.”

“What were his exact words?!”

“Um, it said something like ‘I love the way you describe my dad’s speech’… and yeah.”

“And you talked to him yesterday, too, right? What’d he say then?”

“Gracie, can you drop it? Please? Besides, I already told you.”

“So? Tell me again! You are on speaking terms with a rich, famous, totally gorgeous guy! I want details!”

“Hm…Well, he doesn’t have a girlfriend and –oh! I think the bell’s gonna ring soon.” Talia said, getting up with her tray.

“We still have fifteen minutes!”

“Yeah, well –gotta go!” She waved and did some artful dodging to leave the cafeteria in what should’ve been a world-
record.


Alright, so overall, this looks kind of cliché but I'm hoping you'll do something with the story line to make it your own. Another thing I like less is the way the girls' behaviors are completly and utterly blond 14 year olds cliché. It's kinda making me tired... like I don't know them really much; there's nothing in their speech or actions that tell me much about them (except for Talia being very honnest) or sets them appart. It's hard characterizing... believe me, I know, because you know them but it's not so clear in the reader's mind. Just adding some depth to the characters will make this much better, and probably perfect, since there is close to no mistakes.
On to the next chapter, then!

-Truth-
.- <3 -.








Don't go around saying the world owes you a living; the world owes you nothing; it was here first.
— Mark Twain