This story is very hard to follow. As I read the story, I began to ask myself questions like "Where are the quotation marks?" and "What a weird format." Finally I asked myself, "Why am I reading this?"
I think the formating is so uniquely original that it is distracting me from the story, which is never a good thing, unless your story is bad, in which case it is a blessing in disguise.
I'm going to lock this, since you've deleted the content. If you ever want to put the chapter back up here (which would be completely okay!) just PM me and I'll unlock it for you.
"Let's eat, Grandma!" as opposed to "Let's eat Grandma!": punctuation saves lives.
