Chapter 11
“I think I know where you’re going wrong with this look,” said Vanessa thoughtfully as we sat in her messy bedroom.
A week had gone by since mine and Derrick’s argument and I was sitting in a chair facing the mirror, with a towel around my shoulders while Vanessa fiddled with the straightener.
“I wasn’t aware that I was going wrong with my look at all,” I said thoughtfully, actually I knew where I was going wrong but I wasn’t about to admit that my hair looked like a wig and I had back combed my hair so hard that most of it was a hairball in my drain pipe in the shower. My face was actually so orange I could play the scarecrow from the wizard of oz. Well if that’s what Erik was interested in maybe I should just play along.
“Your hair,” said Vanessa and sighed, she pulled the hot straightener through my hair separating strands of my hair with her fingers. “Don’t back comb it. It’s prettier like this.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
She picked up another section of my hair with two fingers and ran the straightener through them. I sat back in my seat trying to think of the situation I had gotten myself into.
Derrick still hadn’t said a word to me. He avoided me in school and didn’t even wish me good luck when the director of the play rang me and told me to come down to the theatre for a meeting. He ignored me in the corridors and didn’t sit at the lunch table anymore. I resentfully noticed the way he decided to spend more time with Laura- his newest fan. I usually watched them at break, fuming anytime she laughed at one of his jokes or leaned in to whisper something in his ear. He was an ass.
“What do I do about Derrick?” I asked.
“Do what every normal person would do,” replied Vanessa, “Talk to him.”
“I tried! But he keeps hanging up on me.” I only tried once and his phone went into voice mail.
“That doesn’t sound like Derrick.”
“That’s not the point…the point is that he’s pissed off with me and I really want to make it better.”
“Why did you guys argue then?”
“Erik’s party,” I replied grumpily, “He just got annoyed that I’m so into Erik and that I’m going through this whole makeover for him.”
“Well then think about what’s more important,” replied Vanessa wisely, “Is Erik really that worth it if you’re going to lose a friend over him?”
“Of course not,” I replied, it was the right thing to say even though I didn’t feel that way at the moment, “Derrick is more important. But I’m never like that with him! Think of all the people he ever went out with! Remember Amy?”
Vanessa shuddered. We both remembered Amy. She was Derrick’s longest relationship and was the nicest girl we’ve known…yeah, right. She was natural and barely wore any makeup. She always wore skirts and dresses and boots. She loved Derrick’s music and usually hung out with us on Sunday mornings until that one day when she saw Derrick hugging me. She went crazy and forbade him from talking to either me or Vanessa for the duration of their relationship. He had to sneak around her just to get to us. I hated her with a passion. Vanessa found it amusing and did everything she could to make the girl crazy. One day Amy went mental and made Derrick choose between her and us. Derrick chose us.
“Well he did the right thing in the end,” replied Vanessa gently, “He could’ve easily stayed with her but he dumped her for us. Maybe you should do the same thing at least…now.”
“Yeah I should shouldn’t I?” Vanessa was the one that came up with this stupid idea anyway…why was she suddenly going back on it now? I wondered thoughtfully. I watched as she tried to fix my hair. She looked quiet and thoughtful, upset almost. As if something was really bothering her.
“What’s wrong?” I asked her gently.
Vanessa forced a smile, “Nothing’s wrong. What gives you that idea?”
“What’s wrong?” I repeated more firmly this time.
Vanessa laugh, “I’m okay. Don’t worry about me.”
She sounded less convincing the last time. I decided to try again, “What’s wrong Vanessa?”
“I’m just…really…” Vanessa began then broke off, her face was in a scowl- the type of scowl that she usually had on her face when she was thinking too much and didn’t know how to put it into words. “I just have…stuff…going on.”
“Stuff?”
“Yes. Stuff.”
“And does that stuff have anything to do with the play?” I asked her curiously.
“What do you mean? What gives you that idea?”
“You’re acting weird about it,” I replied, “One minute you were encouraging me to go and forcing a script on me. The next minute you’re avoiding the topic and giving me hints to quit it altogether. Why?”
“I’m not telling you to quit it,” said Vanessa, “I’m just saying that if it’s going to affect Derrick’s friendship then there’s no point in it.”
“Are you sure that’s all you’re worried about?”
“Yes,” insisted Vanessa and sighed, “There’s nothing else. I promise.”
I wasn’t convinced. “Well then I guess today is a good way of figuring out our next plan of action,” I said, “If I don’t get the part then we’ll abandon the Erik plan and get back to our old lives.”
Vanessa looked relieved. “What if you do get the part?”
“It’s a good opportunity,” I said, “I’ll just go through with it.”
“Oh…it’s all down to fate then.”
“Down to fate,” I repeated and smiled.
Vanessa didn’t look too happy about it, “Then I have a feeling that fate hates me,” she murmured.
That brought our little meeting to a grim end. I pondered her words, staring at myself in the mirror and trying to think of what to do. I couldn’t lose Derrick’s friendship over this. My face looked horrible and disgusting. I decided to clean off the foundation.
*
When we arrived at the theatre a secretary directed us to a small and cozy meeting room on the second floor of the theatre. It was bright and filled with huge windows that looked out onto the bright and spectacular view of the Grand Canal.
Teenage boys and girls sat in a circle around the balding director and his pretty red haired assistant who was flicking through the script thoughtfully, a pair of glasses perched on the bridge of her nose.
Vanessa made to walk out of the room but I grabbed her arm and pulled her down to sit beside me on one of the chairs. She made a faint sound of complaint but I gave her a sweet smile and she sighed, before folding her legs and arms and glared on to the opposite wall. The door opened and the girl with the boyish haircut by the name of Ivy walked in, a flicker of recognition crossed her eyes before she rushed in to sit beside me. Today she was wearing skinny jeans and a red blazer. A black hat rested on her head and black glittery eyeliner surrounded her eyes.
“Hey,” she said with a huge grin, “I am so happy to see you back here again! I was scared that they were going to be giving the part to some…”
“They didn’t tell me if I got the part yet or not,” I said with a shrug, “I love your blazer.”
As Ivy gazed distractedly at her blazer Vanessa grabbed my arm and pulled me towards her, “Why are you talking to her?” she hissed from the corner of her lips.
“Why what’s wrong with her?” I whispered in alarm, Vanessa hated a few people in her life. April was one of them. And April deserved it. What had this chick done?
“She’s…” started Vanessa.
“Why are you here?” asked Ivy throwing Vanessa a calculating look.
I pulled my arm out of Vanessa’s grasp and smiled at Ivy, “She came to give me some support.”
Both Vanessa and Ivy glared at each other and turned to stare at the director. I sighed and rolled my eyes, whatever their problem was could probably be solved later.
I saw a flicker of green from the corner of the room and smiled at the sight of Erik sitting in the corner with a pair of mp3 earphones snaking from the inside of his white shirt. He looked too engrossed in the music, moving his head to the beat and mouthing out words to the songs. His thick eyelashes made a small shadow on his tanned and flawless cheek. My heart started thudding furiously in my chest at the thought of being able to run my finger down his cheek, at the chance to be able to kiss his lips and hear him whisper my name…
“Hello guys,” said the director, he got to his feet and grinned at everyone in the room, “I’ve had the pleasure of watching all your auditions and I would like to thank each and every one of you for the time and effort you put in. We’ve been looking for the girl to play the part of Eliza and I am proud to say that our lead will be given to none other than Michelle O’Connor.”
I sat there in stunned silence as Erik pulled off his earphones and started clapping. Everyone in the room started applauding after him amid a chorus of murmured voices. Everyone was staring at me with frowns on their faces- like they didn’t expect me to get the part at all.
I didn’t expect myself to get the part at all. Neither did Vanessa. I noticed as she got to her feet and rushed out of the room. People started getting to their feet and filing out the door. I was stuck sitting in shock in the chair. I felt Ivy’s hand on my shoulder as she congratulated me and Erik’s grinning face as he came up to me.
“You got it,” he said excitedly, “I can’t believe you got it.”
“I suppose I should thank you for it,” I found myself replying and gave him a shaky smile, “didn’t expect myself to get it to be honest.”
“I knew you would,” replied Erik and gave me a smug grin, “You could almost say I predicted it.”
“Ah…psychic,” I said and got off my seat, “I see. Well I’ve got to go after Vanessa. I shall see you…in school?”
“Yeah you will,” said Erik, his green eyes sparkled with the smile that he threw me, “I’m hoping to see you. We’ve got rehearsing to do.”
I liked the sound of that. I loved the sound of it but I didn’t say it. Instead I gave him a small smile and told him bye before running out of the room to look for Vanessa.
*
I found her in the bathrooms. She was sitting on the sink with tears running down her face.
“Vanessa?” I asked her softly, making my way towards her as cautiously as I could. The high I had at the thought of getting the lead part started to fade. Vanessa was rarely upset, it tore at my heart.
She shook her head and slid off the sink and stumbled her way to the cubicle. She grabbed toilet paper and dabbed it on her face.
“I’m sorry!” she said gulping back her tears, “I’m really sorry! I didn’t want you to see me like this.”
“Vanessa,” I whispered softly, “what’s wrong?”
She shook her head again and took a deep breath, “Nothing.”
“We’ve been friends for years…” I said and made my way towards her, “I know when something’s wrong. You’ve never been this upset…what’s wrong?”
She hesitated before letting me wrap my arms around her. She started crying again. “I should be happy for you,” she sobbed, “I s-should be a g-good friend…”
“I can quit.” I whispered, “If that’s the problem I can quit.”
“No,” she murmured, “Don’t. Do you ever let fate decide? Just sit back and say that things will happen like they’re supposed to happen? I waited for it to happen. And now it’s going to happen.”
“What’s going to happen?” I asked her softly, “You can tell me.”
“You’re going to hate me,” sobbed Vanessa, “You’re going to hate me so much!”
“I won’t hate you, I’ll never hate you.”
“I’m just so confused! I don’t know what to do!”
“Talk to me, what’s wrong?”
“You won’t be able to help me,” whispered Vanessa and started crying again, “No one can help me”
I wanted to help her! I crushed her to me, trying to whispered words of support and praying that she’ll stop. But any time I told her that everything was ok, she told me that they weren’t. I hated it! At that moment getting the lead part of the play didn’t seem like the best thing that happened to me. At the moment I knew that whatever she was going through she couldn’t go through it alone. But how the hell was I supposed to help her when she wouldn’t tell me what it was.
That night I rang Derrick in the hope of getting him to help me. I rehearsed the words in my head over and over again. I’m sorry for what I said Derrick. I’m sorry for being such a dick. We need you. Us fighting isn’t helping Vanessa- she needs us at the moment. Please forgive me? For the sake of our friendship?
“Hello?” said a female voice.
“Derrick?” I asked.
“Laura,” replied the voice, she suddenly giggled and I heard Derrick saying something to her in the background. There was the sound of crackling and then her laughing again.
Then Derrick’s voice broke the silence, “Michelle?”
Every single word I had planned to say to him vanished at that moment. Laura? Was he seriously hanging out with Laura? I didn’t say anything instead I pressed the hang up button and stared at my phone in silent rage. I couldn’t help the disappointment flooding through me like the waves on the sand. There I was obsessing over his ditching me, there I was hoping that we’ll be friends again and there he was- making out with some girl. He clearly moved on from me and didn’t want to be friends again. Maybe it was time I should do the same.
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