Charlie
“Calm down guys! We’ll talk about this when we get home.” I hushed all four of my kids up. Looking at the anger in their faces reminded me so much of their mother when she was alive. I knew I should’ve waited until we got home. But we were all enjoying dinner so much and I was excited about us moving. I guess I should’ve known they would react this way.
I got our young waitress’s attention and she handed me the bill. I gave her a five dollar tip and then kids and I walked quietly out of the restaurant. I really wish Emily was here. If she was here she would help me explain this to the rest of them. Emily was always the peacemaker. Now she’s off at college pursuing the career her mom always wanted.
Aaron, Jeremy, and April sulked to the truck. Jasper didn’t really seem to mind the news as much as them. It’s probably because he’s already graduated and he’s not leaving all his high school friends behind. Sigh. This was going to be a long night.
The drive home was dreadful. The silence was loud. Their anger was radiating off of them, making the silence even louder. When we pulled into the driveway, the truck doors were slammed and the twins and Jeremy went inside immediately. Well good thing Jasper wasn’t against me, he would at least get through to April and then she would get through to Aaron. Jeremy was a lost cause without Emily there. I took a deep breathe before going inside to face my three angry teenagers.
“I can’t believe this Dad! Why do we have to move now? I have two more years of high school left!” Jeremy bombarded me as I walked through the door.
“I’m doing what’s best for this family. Hope is a good town, and all your family is there.” I tried to explain to them calmly. I could feel the beginning of a headache coming on.
“And exactly what kind of job are you going to have in a town like Hope. Isn’t there like 3 stores and a population of 5?” Aaron asked me with deep sarcasm in his voice. He was always the troublemaker.
“Well I’m going to be working on my writing…” I begun before April cut me off.
“Your writing? Like that’s going to give us enough money to live.” She laughed humorlessly.
“You didn’t let me finish,” my anger was getting the better of me. “I’m going to be working on my writing and I bought a bookstore. Look guys, I know this is going to be a big change, and you’re not exactly thrilled by the idea. But we are moving, whether you like it or not. I’ve worked hard for this family. I’ve raised you kids all by myself, and I think I’ve done a pretty good job, so just cut me some slack and trust me when I say this will be good for us.” I looked each of them in the eyes, pleading with them to understand.
“Dad’s right guys. Cut him some slack, so we’re moving big deal. Grow up and stop throwing little temper tantrums.” Jasper told them and gave me a reassuring pat on my shoulder.
“Whatever just do whatever.” Jeremy stormed off to his room. I looked at Aaron and April waiting for the same reaction. But they surprised me.
“I guess its okay, Dad. I mean whatever you think is best. I’m not exactly thrilled about it, but I won’t give you any trouble.” My daughter said, trying her best not to sound sarcastic or bitter. I looked to Aaron, he still looked angry, April elbowed him in his ribs.
“Yeah Dad, it’s no big deal like Jasper said.” Aaron said quickly agreeing with his twin. Then they both went to their separate rooms. Probably so they wouldn’t say something to contradict with what they just told me.
I looked at my oldest son, appreciation in my eyes. “Thanks son, we’d probably still be arguing if you hadn’t spoken up.”
“Yeah well, Emily isn’t here. Someone has to be peacemaker,” he patted my shoulder one last time. “Good night Dad.” He went to his room.
I went to the kitchen and put on a pot of coffee. I took out my cell phone and dialed the familiar number. Please pick up. I thought as I listened to the phone ring once, twice. On the third ring she picked up.
“Hello.” Her voice was weary.
“Hey, Sara. It’s Charlie. Sorry if I woke you.” I greeted my sister-in-law.
“Oh hey, Charlie. Its okay, I wasn’t asleep yet,” She reassured me. “Did you tell them?”
“Yeah they didn’t take it well at first. Jazz convinced the twins to agree, but Jeremy’s still mad at me.”
“Well, that’s understandable. I’m sure he’ll come around soon.”
“I wouldn’t be so sure about that. Anyway I guess we’ll be packing all this week, and we’ll probably hit the road next Saturday or Sunday.”
“Alright well, I’ll tell mom and dad. They’ll be excited. Well Charlie I have to go put Maggie to bed, I’ll talk to ya soon.” she seemed upset, which was understandable considering what today was.
“Yeah Sara, I’ll talk to ya soon.” I hung up reluctantly. I liked talking to Sara; she always seemed to know exactly what to say.
I poured a cup of coffee and went out on the front porch. Sitting there watching the cars pass by was a regular thing for me. Well all my kids probably hate me right now. Sure they could put on a good act, but it was obvious they were still mad. Sigh times like these made me miss Abigail even more. It had been a long 16 years and today was exactly 16 years. Yeah I pretended to be all excited and happy about today for Aaron and April, but this day was hard. I couldn’t afford to break down though.
“God, if you’re listening, please don’t let this move be a mistake. I’m doing all I can for these kids. I can’t stand to disappoint them,” I whispered up to the black sky. Not that I thought He really was listening to me. Yeah I’m sure He’s up there, but if He really cared about me, I would have Abby by my side right now.
Sara
Sitting there looking at my little girl sleep was almost therapeutic. My Maggie. She was the one thing in my life that made any sense. At least for about two years now. I brushed a strand of her black curly hair off her face. She looked so peaceful. I wish I could sleep that good. Oh to be five years old again, when your only worry was skinned knees, and a band-aid fixed everything. Sigh. I got up off her small bed and turned off the light as I left her room.
I went across the hall to kitchen and put on a cup of coffee. I looked on the counter where I laid my phone down after my short conversation with Charlie. Charlie. He was the one person I could talk to about Jake’s death. He understood completely. Of course he did, he lost his wife, my twin sister, sixteen years ago, today.
I could tell he knew something was up with me. Especially after my hasty goodbye. But I couldn’t unload on him tonight, not on this day. Just thinking about it made my heart tighten. Abigail didn’t deserve to die, she was everything I wasn’t. She was beautiful, smart, and loving. She was one of only two people that made me feel special, and now both those people were dead. Now Maggie was the only sunshine in my life.
“Oh Sara, don’t be so negative,” I whispered to myself. “All the bad happens, so the good can too.” I quoted my mother. She didn’t approve of me moping, is what she called it, I have to be happy. Easier said than done.
“God? Help me get over all this hurt, please?” I pleaded with the Big Guy, not that He ever answered me before.
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