***
He covered my eyes with his scarf. I had no clue to where I was going at all. All I could hear were our footsteps against the crackling snow and then the smooth floors. His hands were on my shoulders as his lead me to nowhere.
“Is this really necessary?” I pointed to the scarf.
“Yes Jessa,” he laughed.
A smile grew on my face.
Then we came to a halt and he took off the scarf and I saw his wonderful face. My smile grew bigger and I could feel my heart speeding.
He moved away so I could see what the surprise was.
No, no way.
Tears burned my eyes while I couldn’t believe my own sight.
“No way Harry!” I said.
He hugged me and said, “I knew that you would like this,”
“You’re wrong, I love it,”
I took in the most amazing sight in the world. I once told him on a Christmas night that I’ve always loved it when in Romantic movies the lovers admit their love to each other in mid dance. When the romantic music plays and they are stuck with each other no matter what. The other dancers sway around them and they stared into each other’s eyes and kiss.
There were many dancers in elegant dresses of colors of cream, baby pink, Sky blue, chocolate brown, and yellow. A piano player was placed on a stage that lay in front of us. The long red curtains shaped the windows as the dancers put in their masks.
My heart skipped a beat and Harry lead me to the dance floor. Then I heard my favorite song ever, by one of my favorite bands. One Republic’s “Marchin On” was playing through the speakers. I looked up and noticed that the actual band stood up there and the lead singer played on the piano as he sang.
“No way,” I whispered.
“What…?” Harry asked.
“One Republic is up there!” I whispered loudly.
He smiled and I looked up at them once again. Those words that he sang made my heart flutter and I hugged Harry as hard as I possibly could.
“Thank you so much,” I kissed his cheek.
He blushed and we continued to dance to that wonderful beat of the piano.
Don't give up when your are writing. It has good potential, don't get me wrong, there was lovely description and the imagery was great but I just feel the plot went nowhere. Like you started writing and then gave up haalf way. Like there was so much more to come. It was good thought, I did really like it! What I'm getting at here if Im honest is that well, I guess I was dying for more and then when it came I just needed too much more! I really love this series and I think you are writing it really well you just need to keep heart. Dont give up half way. Write more. Let me know. This story is showing passion but not enough of it. It shows alot of things really but only through a window. Its like were giving a brush to search for nits in your hair (ugh I know 
) but you really need a fine tooth comb. We never have enough.
xD
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