Young Writers Society

My alarm went off, disturbing the silence that was surrounding me.( I like this line, the disturbing the silence that was surronding me I got up slowly, stretching every muscle in my body. I got dressed without a hesitation, having already chosen what I would be wearing for today. Everything was done fast and neatly, the routine imprinted in my bones. Mornings weren’t my best moments. I hated them, to be frank. From the moment you had to turn off the annoying beep of your alarm, to shaking off the sleep that was still clinging to you. I wished I could still be in bed, dreaming peacefully. I was sure it's safe to say that every teenager felt the same way. But I had to go to school.

Going down the stairs, to the kitchen to take my breakfast, my thoughts were still on my warm bed. A loaf of bread and the peanut butter jar were already on the table, waiting for me. Thanks mom, I thought. She knew what I liked, and remembered to leave them in plain view every morning. When my breakfast was finally ready, I sat at the table and started to pour myself a glass of orange juice when my brother entered the room and took it from my hands.

“Hey!” I protested. I knew that I was the one going to clean up after him. Even though he was a year older than me, I was more responsible than him.

“Thanks, Alicia,” he said in an exaggerated tone of gratitude. I eyed him for a few seconds before going back to my breakfast.

Benjamin Weller was the kind of guy that was considered handsome. Brown hair, always stylishly messy, big blue eyes, tall, muscular, tanned, he was the fantasy of practically every girl at our school. Right now, he was only in his plaid pajama pants.

I ate my breakfast rapidly and then got to my room. I had to apply makeup and brush my teeth. Every day it was the same thing. I was hurrying up so I could be ready when Liam showed up and my brother was sleeping up to the last moment. Guys tended to do that, always be last minute. And sometimes I was sure it was especially to get on my nerves.
Someone knocked at the door, interrupting me and my thoughts. I hurried to the door and opened it. Liam was standing before me, smiling. My heart was pounding in my chest, making me a little light headed. This line really adds character

He passed me and dropped his backpack on the couch, and then sat in a chair. He knew the routine pretty well too. I got upstairs again, leaving him alone. Ben shouldn’t be long, and besides, Liam had come so many times to stay at our place that he probably didn’t mind being alone for a few minutes.



***

I sighed heavily, looking at my reflection in my mirror. Why didn’t I inherited the clear blue eyes of my mother? I’m sure that with those eyes, nobody would resist me, including Liam.I like knowing the thoughts of her, and maybe a description here? Ben had those eyes and every single girl at school was drooling over him. And the girls that were indifferent to him were falling for his best friend, Liam Rowley. Liam… he was something else entirely. "he was something else entirely" I like this, it just adds to the character so the reader knows she isn't some bimbo Ben was a typical guy, he wanted to have fun and didn’t care who would be hurt in the process, the act he was putting on when people where around him, but his best friend… He wasn’t like that. He was caring and fun and sweet and handsome… I could go on for hours, I thought and laughed at myself. I was such a girl sometimes. Listen to me! Obviously, all guys were the same, and the little bit I had seen of my brother at school, just reinforced that fact.

But I didn’t like Liam for his good looks. I didn’t like him like the other girls at school. Even though I couldn’t resist those big green eyes, I liked him because I knew him. I like this, it's different from other stories, "oh my god, he's soo dreamyy!" this main character is a strong independent girl, I like it!

When we were just little kids, he had once been my best friend. Me, Ben and Liam were inseparable. But the difference in age between us quickly separated us. One year. What would one year do? But trust me, it did something. When the boys left for Intermediate School, I was left alone at the Elementary School. I quickly made other friends, but I preferred, by far, the company of Liam and my brother. The years went by and they didn’t want to hang with me anymore. Now, Liam barely said "hi" to me.

“Alicia!” The voice of my brother

resonated through the walls

.The quoted part is a great line, the use of vocabulary is great there! I picked up my bag and came down the stairs two at a time. I locked the door and ran to Ben’s car. They were already there, laughing at some joke I didn’t hear. They started to talk, but I quickly understood that it wasn’t something that I wanted to hear, so I fetch my Ipod from my bag and put on the ear buds. I cranked up the volume to drown their voices. It wasn’t for the reasons you're thinking. I didn’t mind them talking, it was their subject that I disliked. Sometimes they even talked about how some girls were hot… And I’m not really into girls, if you know what I mean.

The way to the school was short, and my brother was now navigating through the school parking lot. When he finally set his mind on one spot and parked, I opened my door and walked fast to the front door. I found my locker and did my combination without looking. It’s been five years that I’ve had this lock and I knew the numbers by heart. I placed my things on the shelves and picked one of my binders. Chemistry. The only class I didn’t have any friends to keep me company. Great. At that moment a hand came over my eyes, covering them completely. I knew exactly who it was.

“Adam”, he always did that trick on me since seventh grade when he discovered it.

“Why do you always know it’s me?” He asked, taking his hand away from my face and chuckling almost inaudibly.

“Well, you’re the only one that does that thing…” I said while I turned to him. I was joining his laughter when I turned around and saw that Liam was right beside me. He pointed at his locker, which was just beside mine.

“Oh, sorry…” I said, feeling my face go hot. I took a step forward, and he slipped between me and the lockers.

“We'd better go…” I said to Adam.

“Yeah, sure. Lead the way,” he replied, spreading out his arm. I smiled at him, and guided him to my science class. He left me when the bell was about to ring, everybody else was already installed at their tables and there was only one place left. The place just in front of the class. Great, I was sure going to enjoy this day.


*****

The bell ringed, announcing the end of the class. Finally it was lunch, the best hour of the day. Already, a pack of students were pushing each other to pass as I navigated between them. I prayed silently, my lips unmoving, while I passed a few of my friends.What was she praying for? But when I saw a hint of brown hair and strong shoulders sticking out of the crowd, I let out a breath. Liam and Lisa were just what I needed.

I tried to do the combination of my locker with my elbows glued to my sides but I didn’t succeed. I elbowed Lisa in the ribs, but she didn’t seem to mind.

They were making out, and he’d gotten her sandwich between the lockers and him. Damn, I couldn’t look. I tried to focus on getting my purse loaded up and getting rid of my books. Take a deep breath, I told myself, you’re going to be alright. Yes, I will. It’s not like I hadn’t seen this before, right? We were in May, meaning that I had had almost 7 months of that. I could deal with it one more time. A couple of months and it was over. Except the fact that they were going to be at my house every day during the summer. Since Ben’s best friends with Liam, and so are Amber and Lisa. Don’t think about that, I shook myself mentally. Stupid girl.

I closed my locker, feeling like a total idiot since I was there, standing just beside a couple that was making out. And that the couple was including the boy that I loved and had loved for at least 4 years. Whoa, that sounded pathetic, and I guessed it really was. I forced myself to take big steps toward the door of the hallway. I walked to the cafeteria, leaving them and all those damned thoughts behind.

I spotted my friends, sitting outside, on the grass. It was a beautiful day of spring and it was hot outside. I laughed silently, thinking of how my friends hated the cafeteria and how they had anticipated the good weather so we could eat outside again.

“Alicia!” Rose said almost instantly after she saw me coming toward them. At the sound of my name, a few of my friends looked at me. The others were occupied with something that I couldn’t see. A few minutes later, I saw them split up and come back to where I was standing with Rose.

“Hey, was up? I didn’t see you this morning,” Scott, one of my friend, said.

“Gee, Scott, not like you see her every morning. She barely takes the bus anymore,” Rose said, laughing at my side.

“Hey, I’m not the kinda guy that stops hoping,” he said with a big smile for me.

“Cheesy, but not my type. But I guess Alicia appreciates,” Rose replied, smiling at me.

“Yeah, I bet she does,” Riley said to us, from the other side of the circle that was forming close to us.

“Eavesdropping is not good, Herbert,” Rose replied. I coughed to mask my laughter, and heard someone among us do the same. Herbert was Riley’s last name and he had always hated it. That’s when the nick name had come out. Nobody called him that anymore, expect Rose when she wanted to make him angry.

“Shut up, Belden,” he shot back, his eyes shooting lightning. Laughter exploded all around me and people started talking again. This kind of thing always happened in my group. I always preferred the guys to the girls because of that. And the male population in my gang was pretty much equal to the female one. But even though I preferred the simplicity of a relationship with a guy, I still had my best friend. Rose was the kind of girl that just wanted to have fun, and I loved her for that. I had met her in 7th grade when we were both changing school to a secondary one. From that time on, we were inseparable, and we still are.

“You should give him a break. It’s not like he chose his name. Plus your name is not really better,” I said to her, looking between her and Riley. Back and forth.

“Hey, my name is great! Rosalie Belden. Sounds powerful, compared to Riley…” She drifted off, catching Riley watching her.

“Yeah, if you say so,” I said, laughing at the two of them.

“Yeah, whatever you say, Rose. But if you insist on being dead, you can say it one more time,” Riley said, frowning at her beneath his long bangs. She smiled at him sweetly and nodded to him. I knew her too well to know that she wouldn't stop so easily. She was the kind of girl that did as she wanted, no matter what the ones around her thought. A few minutes later, she turned and winked at me, and I knew that I was right. She was my best friend after all, and I knew her all too well.

“Okay, so can I come tonight? Or you want to come to my place?” She asked, mainly to change the subject.

“What do you want to do? Well I guess we are Monday, so we can do homework?” I said, but saw her grimacing. “What?”

“Well, we could do something else than homework,” she said the last word like it was the plague.

“Yeah, well unlike you, I like to actually do the work people give me. And besides, aren’t you behind in French?” I asked as I gently pushed her on the shoulder. She frowned at me.

“Well it’s not against the law to have some fun now and then.”

I sighed heavily and said, “Okay, what do you want to do?” She lit up instantly.

“I was thinking that we could maybe… I don’t know; go to a club or something…” She drifted off, leaving the space empty for other prepositions, but none came.

“You know that’s illegal, right? To go to a club when you are a minor,” I said, stopping there to see her expression. She didn’t look too happy that I’ve made that remark.

“I know, but the thing is… We need something to do. Something fun, and memorable, and…” She drifted off again, wanting somebody to jump in.

“We need a party,” another girl said, her name was Bailey and she was a tall girl, just like a model would be.

“It’s Monday guys,” I said. “Just saying,” I continued when they all looked at me. And after a moment of silence, they all began to talk all at once, making plans to throw a huge party. Ha, like that will happen, I thought to myself. My friends were always planning a party, but it was rare that it even happened. At the end of 10th grade, they had decided that they were going to organize one party each week. That didn’t happen for long. After a while, it stretched to one a month, and then one for 2 months… But at least they were trying; I had to give them that.

Rose grabbed my arm and locked her eyes with mine. She was happy. She wanted a party for a long time, but didn’t have the guts to ask. And now she had the possibility of one and didn’t even have to make a fool of herself in the process. But then she heard the possible date of the party and her face fell. Friday. This Friday. And we weren’t going to be here because we are going to an I See Stars concert. Our favorite group and they aren’t going to come by to Canada anytime soon… A party with your friends, or a concert of your favorite band? That was pretty easy for me, but I guess it was a close call for her.

“No, you can’t make it Friday. Alicia and I aren’t going to be here,” she said calmly, too calmly for what she was probably feeling inside.

“Oh, right. That Seeing Stars concert or something?”

“I See Stars,” I said, frustrated. My friends were good friends, but they were horrible with music. They went with main stream, only listening at the music that was playing on the radio, not bothering to look for other bands that might be better than what they were already listening to. People whose parents were famous and didn't even know how to sing or play guitar, and maybe even their voices are arranged in studios… Aw, they were giving me chills.

“Yeah, that’s right. I See Stars… I’ll try to remember that, sorry Alicia. So what? Saturday would be better?” Scott said, smiling at me and Rose. He was always happy and trying to make everyone comfortable and cheerful as well. I liked that of him.

“That would be awesome,” Rose said.

“It’s on bitches!” Adam screamed, dancing like a complete idiot and everyone busted up in laughter

.Probably my favorite line in the whole story, made me rofl

Going down the stairs, to the kitchen to take my breakfast

Brown hair, always stylishly messy, big blue eyes, tall, muscular, tanned. He was the fantasy of practically every girl at our school.

Guys tended to do that, always be at the last minute.

He was caring (comma) fun (comma) sweet and handsome

so I fetched my ipod from my bag

everybody else had already been installed

The place was just in front of the class.