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John Manley Chapter 2



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Sat Aug 19, 2006 10:11 am
Certainly Love says...



Chapter 2

“You what?!” Julia McCann said in utter surprise upon hearing Violet’s encounter with The Count of Manarte. Julia and Violet were walking in the park and Violet was explaining her experience of being in the presence of the John Manley. “I can’t believe you actually spoke to him. No one has ever had the chance to speak to him before.”

“I have to say, John Manley is indeed very charming.”

“Oh, when can I meet him?” Julia said eagerly.

“Probably never. He rejects all sorts of people and doesn’t wish for anyone’s company. He practically rushed me out of his house. You could tell he was trying his hardest to get me out of his house.”

“Can’t we just drop by?”

“Drop by? I don’t know. He is very mean-spirited.”

Julia was disappointed and let out a sigh. “You really are the lucky one. I should have walked with you when you asked…” She then paused. “Is he really as handsome as you say he is?”

“Oh yes…You should see him in his reading glasses. He is rather intelligent-looking.”

“Does he paint as well as they say?”

“Of course. As a matter of fact he gave me one of his paintings…of him.”

“Oh Violet, we must see him today. Maybe he is your match.”

“Nonsense Julia, you know better not to get into matchmaking.”
Julia laughed and pulled at her arm, “Can we at least get a view of him. We can leave once we see him.”

“Julia, we can’t just leave, that would be rude…but then again it would make him happy if we did.”

Violet walked further and Julia hurried to her side.

“What ever is the matter?”

“I…I just can’t see him…He’s too handsome for his own good.”
Julia started to laugh, “Don’t be so silly. Let us meet him.”

“Alright, but there may be a chance he might turn us away.”

“If he does, we’ll just barge into his house. That’s as far as I would go. Agreed?”

“Agreed.”

As soon as they approached Manarte House, Julia put a hand over her mouth, “It’s gorgeous.” Violet placed her parasol behind her back, feeling nervous and somewhat embarrassed.

“maybe we shouldn’t do this.” She said while turning around. Julia grabbed her hand.

“No. We are going straight to his home. Violet don’t be ridiculous.”
Violet stood, giving a hesitant look to Julia…She finally knocked upon the door and it took a while for the door to be answered. A servant opened the door and he was smiling, “Hello.”

“Good morning.” Julia said brightly. “Will the count see us?”

“I shall go and see. Stay right where you are.”

They smiled and Julia decided to step into the house without a word.

“Julia! He hasn’t returned yet!”

Soon after Larry came down looking very disappointed. “M’ladies, I apologize but he doesn’t wish for your company.”

Julia stomped on the floor, “Well tell him we’re staying anyway.”

“Certainly.” Larry hurried up the stairs again. Julia sat herself upon the sofa and smiled. Violet frowned.

“You know, we’ve no right…”

“Violet, I’m doing this for your own good. If not for yours, for his.”

“Really, well I don’t think----”

“What are you doing here?” A strong deep voice said. Julia was startled by his tone and she was astonished at the sight of him. Violet slowly turned around afraid to see the look on his face. She felt goose bumps over take her body as soon as she saw his eyes fall upon her. He was in complete disarray and his hair was dishevelled as if he had just woken up from a deep sleep. Yesterday she was completely fine and she felt nothing, but today…it was different. It was as if she had never seen him before.

“Visiting.” Julia blurted out.

“I never have visitors and never wish for visitors. You’re not visiting…you are
simply trying to invade my private life.”

“How would you know what we’re up to? We are visiting just to see what kind of man you are. Hmph! You ought to be glad anyone ever wishes to visit you and you ought to go out more often.”

“Julia!” Violet said. Julia just lifted her head.

“Do not tell me what to do.” John said, fury in his eyes.

Julia frowned, “I was simply suggesting--”

“I don’t need your suggestions.” He said harshly, “Now, how do you explain the way you came up to my doorstep? Why, Miss Williams, you seemed to be quite uncertain… hesitant rather. Were you afraid that I might have thrown you and your friend out…just as I would with anyone else? You know it was exactly what I had in mind, but why did you come anyway?”

“My dear friend Miss Julia McCann wanted to have this little visit, not I.” Violet snatched, “Now how did you know what we---I was thinking?”

“Questions, questions…” John said while taking a step forward, “There is something called windows, you know. Actions speak louder than words. It states the obvious.”

“How can a person like you stay indoors and not find social gatherings entertaining? It looks like you enjoy arguing.” Julia said.

“Well, Miss McCann…I can’t answer that.” John stepped down the last step and sighed. They were all silent.

“Well, I think you are vexing and too outspoken for your own good. Your handsomeness might as well be a crime to. You’re simply wicked, I say.”

Violet actually laughed at Julia’s remark.

“Thank you for the compliment, but I only speak in this way when I am upset. Now, the door is not too far.”

Violet sat down upon the sofa and Julia did the same, “We would like to discuss your paintings. I am really interested.” Julia smiled at Violet.

John slowly walked around the sofa and sat across from them. He then leaned forward and lifted a brow.

“Since I am not at the urge of throwing you out, I’ll talk…simply because you will not remove yourself…I paint portraits mostly and sometimes, outdoor scenery. I have forty-three in all. They hang upon my walls. So don’t be surprised if you see yourself.”

“How very intriguing…” Julia said. Violet stared at John and felt like embracing him for being so serious. Julia seemed mesmerized, she was beyond help. Well, he was indeed a very handsome man.

“M’lord, have you ever courted in the past?” Julia suddenly asked. John stood immediately. He looked to Larry and Larry nodded. It was almost as if it was a signal to chase them away.

“Lord Manarte insists you leave now…”

Violet glanced at Julia and then to John. John finally bowed and started back up the stairs. Violet and Julia had no idea what had transpired and it left Violet in wonderment.
***
As they headed home, Julia had went on and on about John’s behavior and Violet wasn’t quite listening because she was too concerned about why John had left so suddenly.

“He is rather handsome, but he is too outspoken. He could easily make a woman cry if one was sensitive. He has got to change his attitude towards ladies.”

Soon they stopped at Julia’s house and they said their goodbyes. Violet went home in her carriage and as soon as she got home, Daniel Jackson was at her front door. He stood with his hands behind his back and smiled.

“Good day Miss Williams. I just came to visit you. I have some matters to make known to you…” he smiled and handed her flowers.

“Why, how thoughtful of you.” Violet smiled.

“Shall we talk for a bit?” Daniel grinned, taking her hands.

“I would prefer that…”

Soon they started toward the garden, “As your dearest friend,” he began, “I’d like to express myself to you.”

Violet’s heart fell to the ground. Express?! Oh, heavens no!

“Violet, you have been someone I cared for since we were young…and I…I just feel as if…” It was silent, “I’ve fallen in love…”
“What? Fallen in love with whom?” Violet nearly shouted. Daniel laughed.

“Calm down…” And then he took her hands, “I’ve fallen in love with…you.”
Oh no…No, no, no,no, no! Violet breathed in deeply, “I...don’t know what to say…”

“Say anything…”

“Daniel…you have been my dear friend…but I don’t see you more than that.”

“I do love you, Violet.”

Violet smiled and kissed him on the cheek, “Thank you Daniel, buut it is not you who I love.”

Daniel sighed, “I understand. Some things just weren’t meant to be.”

“maybe you should set your interest in Julia McCann.”

“Julia McCann?” he said, “Why?”

“Well, she does think you are wickedly handsome…”

“Really now?”

“She is very daring too. So you won’t be disappointed…”
Daniel smiled, feeling a little hopeful.

“Wait…if it is not me you love…who is it?”

Violet smiled and started to walk away.

“Will you not tell me?”

“No. Goodbye Daniel.” She then hurried away as he shouted.

“My best friend has fallen in love…but with who?”
Violet turned her head to only smile at him. Blast!

***

“Lovely…just lovely, milord.” John turned around to find Larry looking over his shoulder to look at the portrait he had done of Miss Williams.

“Her or the painting?”

Larry smiled, “Her. And you painted her rather accurate.” he observed the painting from top to bottom. “Such a beauty.”

Yes, she is a beauty, John thought.

“Don’t you find her lovely?” Larry asked.

“I don’t know…” He paused.

“Then why do you paint her? I noticed that every time you feel, you paint it…So you must think she is lovely, am I right?” John didn’t answer.

“I remember the day you painted this…” Larry said, looking at a portrait of
Caroline Windsey , “You were heart-broken…every since Miss…”

“Enough…” John said softly, “I’ve heard enough…”

“My apologies…But is it anywhere near the truth?”

“Yes,” He shuddered, “You know me well, Larry. I suggest you keep these things to yourself…”John stared back at his painting.

“You seem different this morning…What a relief to hear you speak so boldly. It’s been quite some time since I’ve seen the other side of you. I must confess, I was enjoying myself.” he chuckled. John managed to smile. “I think you should start seeing other people again…You can’t stay in this confound isolation of yours. You’ll grow old with no one to love you.”

“And what? Start a new life? So I can be heart-broken again? I can’t bear it! I just can’t…”

“Still, life goes on…and it never hurts to try. Don’t give up now.”

“I gave up a long time ago. I have everything I need.”

“Not love. M’lord, give these ladies a chance. Many are anxious to know you…”

“You know, you are very stubborn…”

“Not as stubborn as you…but you’re not going to avoid Miss Williams, are you?”

“I have every incentive to do so.”

“Then I’ll have to take this matter into my own hands.”

“If you do, I’ll have you banned from here.”

Larry laughed, “No, you won’t. You need me…and I am your only friend. I’m only trying to help you.”

John growled, “You win. Now get bring me my hot chocolate.” Larry laughed and left him. Meanwhile, John touched the painting of Miss Williams and smiled. She was beautiful…but he just didn’t know how to make the feeling of attraction go away. He couldn’t think of anything but her. So he lay in bed and he thought about her until he fell asleep.
Last edited by Certainly Love on Thu Oct 19, 2006 2:29 am, edited 2 times in total.
Sincerely, Amanda R. Holden, Author of Azyea's GIfts
  





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Sat Aug 19, 2006 4:21 pm
Sam says...



I'm back for more. :D

STUFF YOU DID WELL:

- Oh, dear. Your characters really have stood the test of time- and they've changed over the past chapter. Not in a bad way, just in a way that we get to see more of them (and what they're really like).

- You've added more conflict, too! I quite like the thing with Daniel. Poor guy...

STUFF THAT COULD USE A SECOND LOOK:

- Julia is a bit of a ditz- which you may or you may not have intended. Indeed, she changes her mind completely about John after Violet's said only one sentence praising him. Bring out her ditziness (by noting how it's like her to do so) or make her argue just a little bit more.

- Also, in their conversation, note people who have known John before. It seems you've gotten caught up in the way he is now- when there used to be a whole different person living in his body. Show a little bit of that guy too. :wink:

- In the...er...fifth piece of dialogue, you repeat the word 'house' just a little too much. Change a sentence by combining or switching that particular word for another.

- Why is Violet so eager to get away halfway through the piece? In the earlier section, she was, you know, just a little eager to get his pants off- but now she doesn't even want to see John. Explain why. Is she suddenly embarrassed for her unladylike behavior yesterday? Does she secretly like him quite a bit and not feel fit to be seen by him? Explanations are a good thing.

- It seems that Violet and Julia change their minds quite a bit when they're talking to one another. There can't be two ditzes in the story! :wink: Have them hold on to their side of the story for just a little bit longer, or in the future, just cut out the scenes that make you tempted to cheat a little by having them agree right away.

- Violet and Daniel appear to be 'best friends', yet it's not really believable at the moment. Why? Violet won't tell David who she 'fancies', and since best friendship is built on quite a bit of trust and shared secrets- it seems improbable. Either bring out his disappointment and shock that she's not telling or have her crack and tell all.
Graffiti is the most passionate form of literature there is.

- Demetri Martin
  





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Sun Aug 20, 2006 2:57 am
Karma says...



I agree with Sam, and I do love this story!

It reminds me slightly of Jane Austen's work.
My Karma Ran Over My Dogma
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53 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 862
Reviews: 53
Wed Nov 29, 2006 11:14 am
Certainly Love says...



I love that I get criticized. hehehe...
Sincerely, Amanda R. Holden, Author of Azyea's GIfts
  








If you can't describe what you are doing as a process, you don't know what you're doing.
— W. Edwards Deming