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Post Twilight Saga : Forever Dusk ~Chapter 02~



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Fri Jun 18, 2010 12:33 pm
Currer says...



Please read the 1st chapter .Cuz this is the second chapter .... It is one page ahead I guess......









Forever Dusk

~ * ~





Chapter o2

~ A New Paranormal Power ~


I was back in my class again , on planet Earth again.

I turned my head right and saw Mr. Jamson standing in front of me with his eyes wide open gazing at me. There were 19 other pairs of eyes who were looking at me with questioning eyes. It took me no time to realise that 'I' was the source of all this distraction.

"Sorry Sir" I said as I restored my senses.Of couse it was rare outcome from me. I was a perfect student with the knowledge of 14 languages n thus a blank look in Mr. Jamson's class was not at all expected from me.

"Ok its fine but don't repeat" Mr. Jamson replyed and started from where he had left the story by William.

For the rest of subject classes I tried my best to ignore Leon and concentrate over the text being taught by different teachers. He was calm with no worries. It gave me a sensation of envy. Dunno why but I really hated that boy.

It was break. Zaara and Daisy stood in front of me. They were predictable. I packed my stuff into my back pack.

"Are U fine ?" Daisy asked the question with uncertain looks.

"Ya ... It was headache...but its gone" I lied since I never wanted a human girl to worry about our lives.

"Then lets go" Zaara pulled my hand and that of Daisy's into her tight grip. Then she walked swiftly straight towards the Cafeteria.

At the door I was able to turn my head and get a sight of the classroom. Leaon was surrounded by girls. Probably the girls who got flatterd by his charming looks. But he got up from his seat at that very moment and our eyes met. It was as if the time n air around us was coagulated. And as if we two were alone in this room, in this infinite universe. But this thought last for mini seconds.

We'll took our etables and headed to our favourite cornner table.

Though I always loved bood specifically that of a Snow Leopard. I was kinda forced to eat the 'human' food. I had to do this to adapt myself into this human world. At mornings I prefered Goat blood but I ate toast. Just to be a part of human community. Cuz I always thought that our eating habbits is the source of real diversity.

I had picked up the simplest food stuffs......Apples, Chicken roll and water. Zaara continued her chat which she called as "Chrispy Chat". But today it was Leonish Chat. I simpley hated his name.....no I hated him cuz he gave me his depressing flashback.

"Ren...Chill" Zaara suggested as she saw worry on my face.

"Oh they're there !" Daisy waved her hand at Knox and Max. Knox came running towards up with his tray.Max followed him slowely.

"Where is Leon ?" Daisy asked them as they occupied their seat.

"He have some work in the Office.......The new guy is intresting" Max made his statement.

"Ya I guess Daisy got a secret crush on him !" Zaara made fun of Daisy.To which Daisy blushed and kicked Zaaras leg. Zaara controlled her screem.

"Ok ....Take it easy..." Max comforted Daisy.

"Ren ? ur fine" Knox asked me the question and stuffed his mouth with Hamburger.

"Ya ....Jeez...What do u think about me?...course I'm fine" I lied to Knox but it was tought o hide from him. He was very skilled at his oratory.

The break got over. And we'll returned to the class. But one thing changed .... Leaon was not in his seat and neither his bag. It was scary. A boy who left in the break on his very 1st day of new school.

But it was now fine with me. No more flashbacks. Life was normal again. But the Leon fangirls were in panic......

Rest of the day went on and on with the rain droplets gushing against the window glass. It was end of my day in the school. I said goodbye to my firends and walked straight to the nearb Bakery. The Bakery was just a few steps way from the High school. It's name was written in Old English font. An old lady named Molly Riddles was the owner of that bakery. Although I hated human food stuff but rarely I got bored my the scent of blood. So I once teasted the Black Forest at least once in a month. Well, it was routine affair.

"Oh ! Hello Ren ..... I've got ur stuff ready" Molly smiled and handed me the box containing 2 pieces of Black Forest.

I gave her a artificial smile and paid her the price. I just came outside the door checking the condition of pastries and saw Leon standingon my right hand side. I got horrified. His eyes were reading the name of the shop and then he scanned the outer looks of the shop. I gave a bank look and walked my seperate way.The road connect my home, Cullen residence, Seattle main market and my of course my High school was right in front of me.

"Its going to rain U'll need sheltter" a polight masculin voice caught my attention which was coming right from my back. I paused my steps and turned around and saw Leon smiling with his same narrow eyes and that attrcting dimple. I ignored him and started to walk on my own to my home. It was soon dark and it stared rainning heavely just like that new boy predicted.....

Its fine...its just rain....n thank god that today I took a water proof bag I murmured to my self. The rain effected me. Unlike rest of our kinda I slept but only for two hours, I ate both human n vampire food and I even got sensations.

"Ur the living evolution of our species" my adoptive graddad Carlisle Cullen kept telling it to me at my hard times. He spoke every word with wisdom and he was my insperation.

I got wet but the street lights gave me a dry feeling. I heard a sound of familiar horn. And I turned my head....I saw two yellow dots over the edge. I recognized the car.

It was Aunt Alice in Porsche 911 Turbo on 40 km/hrs.

I waved my hand though I knew she must have noticed me by her amber yellow eyes. She slowly parked the car in front of me. I opened the door and saw aunt in black gown and with a perfect smile.

"Need lift? Dear Ren" she spoke the words softly with her hands on steering wheel.

"Ya thanks" I answered and removed my wet jacket. In sat in side the car and the car started. I saw a scar on Aunt Alice's let hand and touched it. I forgot about my ability to transfer thoughts by touch at that moment.

And it was like aunt got my full experience of the day. She stopped the car and started to breathe faster as if she was on a roller coaster ride.

"I'm sorry...I forgot" I pleaded her.

"Wow Ren you are amazing!" she answered after processing what she had seen. She restarted the car and began to talk.

"Flashback! I think you have inherited best and opposite of all the Cullen’s." She exclaimed with joy. She was very pleased from me all the time.
And I loved her a lot. Her eyes were focused on the road. And she was just happily laughing.

"Aunt...its no big deal...instead I'm kinda worried" I told her about my situation.

"Ren...sweetie you are really special....and its better if you get it in your head" She answered politely.

"Oh! Carlisle will be so proud and your mom will be so happy." aunt Alice was very pleased.

I was puzzled and looked on my side of the road and saw the woods in the dark. I was really cold weather for me since I was warm blooded.
  





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Fri Jun 18, 2010 3:23 pm
retrodisco666 says...



Again i stand by everything i have put on my review of the first chapter. Read that and see where it takes you.
'I have loved to the point of madness, which for me is the only true way to love'
~Francoise Sagan
  





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Sun Jun 27, 2010 3:01 am
SporkPunk says...



Hiya, Currer!
I'm no fan of twilight, but I saw you only had one review, so I decided to help you out.

Unfortunately, there are very many errors that need to be addressed. So I'll give you some general ideas.

1. You really, really need to take a look at your spelling, your grammar, and your structure. I can tell you spent some time on this, and you truly need to spend time on proofreading as well.
2. Never use chatspeak in literary work. "Cuz" and "n" and "U" are not acceptable English in literary pieces.
3. Numbers under one hundred need to be spelled out.

You have a good general idea. Just make sure your grammar is passable, and you could have a decent piece. :)

Please don't take this personally, I only wish to help make your piece the best it can be.

~Sporks
Grasped by the throat, grasped by the throat. That's how I feel about love. That it's not worth it.

REVIEWS FOR YOU | | Uprising (coming soon!)
  





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Mon Aug 02, 2010 12:27 am
Sierra says...



Hi, Currer. I'm a huge fan of the twilight series, so this caught my eyes. I really liked it.

My nitpicks:

*I think you should check your grammar. Words like 'you', "your', 'and', and 'because' should be spelled out, not abbreviated. It makes it a little hard to read your writing.
*Check you spelling. ALWAYS check your spelling.
*Your sentence structure needs some work, which makes it a little hard to read your work.
*When someone says something, you need to put a period or something at the end of the sentence. Its: "Hey, Nessie." Not "Hey, Nessie".
*I think your character could be a little more life-like. Really make their personality like an actual persons.

All in all, it was very good. Keep writing, Currer.
What a shame,
We used to be such fragile broken things.
  





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Fri Aug 13, 2010 11:21 am
BookGirl says...



Just some small things:
1. Don't abbreviate
2. Use spell check
That's it, though I'm really enjoying reading your story
"I vill now destroy all de Snickuh barhs!" The Angel Experiment.

"You said you were going for a walk!? What kind of walk takes six hours?"
"A long one?" The Mortal Instruments

"Waiting for a special occasion to kill me? Christmas is coming" MI
  





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Fri Oct 15, 2010 3:04 pm
tzuchkan says...



I love your story! It's awesome
  





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Wed Dec 01, 2010 2:14 pm
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Naydy says...



I love you're story. Is really amazing! Keep writing.
Tear down! the walls that will surround
Cry out! above the burning sound
Show me! how bleeding hearts still pound
If we stand together,we will be unbroken!
  





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Sat Jun 11, 2011 6:40 pm
sammay says...



Again, same thing I said in the first chapter, way too many grammar and spelling mistakes, otherwise i like it.
People think I'm quiet those who know me wish I was.

I <3 to write.

- Sammay :D
  








To be a master of metaphor is the greatest thing by far. It is the one thing that cannot be learnt from others, and it is also a sign of genius.
— Aristotle, Poetics