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Young Writers Society


The Watcher(03)



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Tue May 08, 2007 12:52 am
Night Mistress says...



They turned around and saw stone statues. Susan and Lucy gasped at the sight. The Watcher surveyed the area intently and solemnly, examining every detail. She sighed.

“They were helping Tumnus to escape,” said a fox as he appeared over a small hut.

“Take one step closer and I’ll chew you to splinters,” Beaver said as she-beaver held him back.

“Relax, I’m one of the good guys,” the fox answered as he jumped down from a stone.

“Oh yeah, you look a lot awful like one of the bad ones,” Beaver said straining to free himself from his mate’s grasp.

“An unfortunate family trait,” Fox replied bitterly.

The sound of the wolves trying to break barricade interrupted their talk.

“But we can argue that later. Right now, we need a place to hide,” the Watcher said as she looked at the fox. He smirked. “Come…”

The wolves broke through the barricade. “Where are the humans?” Maugrium growled.

“Humans? Here in Narnia?” the fox asked feigning surprise and curiosity. A wolf grabbed him by the scruff of the neck with his jaw. Lucy gasped, but was stopped short by Peter’s hand. Beaver’s protest was restrained by she-beaver’s paw. The Watcher gritted her teeth and gripped the tree branch harder.

“Your reward is your life,” Maugrium spat harshly.

“North - they went north,” the fox answered. The wolf that was holding him let go.

“Smell them out,” Maugrium ordered to his pack and they turned and fled into the darkness, following the fox’s said direction.

The siblings, Watcher and the beavers jumped out of the tree.

“Let’s me care for your wounds,” she-beaver said kindly.

“Thank you,” the fox said. They started a fire and gathered around it, warming themselves against the heated flames. She-beaver tended to the fox’s wounds and he squealed in pain.

Lucy looked at him with concern. “Are you alright?”

“I wish I could say their bark is worse than their bite. Ow!”

“Stop squirming,” ordered his care-taker. “You’re worse than beaver on bath day.”

“The worse day of the year,” Beaver replied, shivering. Lucy and Susan gave small smiles.

“How many have you gathered so far?" the Watcher inquired, speaking up for the first time since the gathering around the fire.

“So what they said about you is true,” the fox said.

“What do they said about me nowadays?” the Watcher asked. The others listened attentively.

“That you’re the guardian of the forest and one of the finest spies,” the fox said.

“A spy? For who?” Peter asked warily, turning his gaze to the young woman.

“Don’t fret, please. I’m a spy for Aslan,” she said. “Balan, you can come out now.”

A black stallion emerged from the shadows of the forest.

“Were you able to gather anything?” the Watcher asked.

“No milady, but I think it’s best if we leave.”

“Yes, I think that as well.” The watcher got up from her spot around the fire and dusted of her raiments.

“You’re leaving? At a time like this?” Peter asked standing up as well.

“Yes, but we’ll meet again,” she said as she climbed atop of Balan. “I’ll be watching you.” Then she and Balan rode off.

“I should be leaving as well,” the fox said while standing up. “I’ve troops to gather.” Then he disappeared.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
When the watcher and Balan was a good couple of miles away, she whistled and a hawk came down from the canopy of the trees.
“Hello Rhea, can you do me a favor?” the young woman asked while stroking the bird.

“Why, of course.”

“Watch the ones who will change Narnia’s fate.”

“So what the animals say is true -” Rhea said.

“Yes, now watch them,” the watcher replied. “Especially the one destined to be High King.”

Rhea flew off and horse and rider continued on their journey.
"I love you," she whispered in his ear, before taking his mouth with her own.

~Elizzabeth Grey of Addicting Posion
  





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Sat Jun 02, 2007 12:13 pm
Twit says...



A lot of this is dialogue, so I'm assuming it's from the film? Even so, the parts with the Watcher, I'm again assuming are your own. That's fine! The dialogue is very accurate - not stilted or too formal. :D One thing tho. Sometimes you capitalize Balan as "the Horse" and sometimes without it, as "the horse". You need to make up your mind about that. :wink:


-Twit
"TV makes sense. It has logic, structure, rules, and likeable leading men. In life, we have this."


#TNT
  





User avatar
250 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1040
Reviews: 250
Sat Jun 02, 2007 5:15 pm
Night Mistress says...



okay.
"I love you," she whispered in his ear, before taking his mouth with her own.

~Elizzabeth Grey of Addicting Posion
  








If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost; that is where they should be. Now put the foundations under them.
— Henry David Thoreau, "Walden"