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Young Writers Society


Warriors Prologue and chap1



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Gender: Female
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Sun Apr 29, 2007 1:23 am
Frenchchilla says...



Prologue

On a night as black as coal, upon a small pool, a cat approached. With what little light the moon created only the faint outline of the cat could be seen. The light seemed to be coming from the cat along with the pool. The cat looked down into the pool and what seemed to be twenty or so cats formed around it.

“Hello Sliverwing” one of the cats said to the one staring down at the pool.
“How are you, Sootfeather?” Silverwing answered with a nod of her head. Slowly all the cats started to step towards the pool and as they did they started to glow just as Silverwing had.

“What do you see in store for our clans?” Sootfeather said, staring into the pool.


Chapter One

Eaglepaw woke startled. He had just had the strangest dream, but he didn’t have anytime to think about it because Sandpaw was coming into the apprentices den to wake him.

“Hey Eaglepaw come on you need to get up. We need to start our tasks”
“I’m coming you can go on and do what you are supposed to do, see ya” Eaglepaw got up and trotted out of the den only to realize that it was very late in the morning. Oh no I can’t believe it I overslept, Foxfeather is going to be soooo mad…,just then Foxfeather came running over she batted his head slightly with her paw.

“Come on you sleepy head lets get moving you aren’t going to become a warrior sleeping in like this” and she started to walk quickly away. Eaglepaw had to run to keep up with her as she made her way to the training hollow.

When Eaglepaw had made it to the training hollow, Foxfeather was ready to start. He didn’t even have any time to catch his breath, for she went right into her training schedule.

“Alright today you’re going to learn ways to attack your foes without getting hurt too much. Okay first I want to see how good you are before we start anything. So I want you to try to attack me head on. You can use any tactics that you want to.” Eaglepaw nodded a little worried but didn’t show it for he knew that she would be able to tell if he did and would use it against him or tease him about it. He stood as strong as he could and he lunged for her side. Foxfeather moved over gracefully at ease and kicked Eaglepaw in his side. Eaglepaw tumbled over and jumped to his feet the wind knocked out of him. He took a couple of seconds to breath and lunged again.

Stormkit and Stumpkit wrestled next to their mother. Stormkit was having the best day at the training hollow watching Foxfeather train Eaglepaw. He was trying to copy the moves that Eaglepaw was using even if they weren’t successful on Foxfeather they were on Stumpkit. Stumpkit cried out as her brother scratched at her belly. She got back at him by biting his ear. He let out a mew of discomfort, but still played with her. Flowertail then got up to keep her kit from going to far off.

“Come on Stumpkit, Stormkit you too, were going back to camp.” Flowertail started to head back to camp with her kits closely trailing her. She always paid close attention to her kits and the ever darkening forest. She was just about back to camp when she caught scent of another cat. She turned to her kits and stood over them trying to pinpoint the direction of the foreign cat. Some twigs snapped and she stared at the place where a cat emerged from the now dark forest.

Flowertail lunged at the cat, she didn’t know who it was but she knew it wasn’t a cat from her clan. The cat writhed underneath her strength. She knew in an instant this was no clan cat, for it wasn’t very strong for its size. When the cat went limp in defeat she got up still cautious. It was a pitch black cat about half her size. It had no scent from any clan she knew of and it was very skinny not having anything to eat for a week by the looks of it.

“Who are you?” The cat looked at her with ravenous eyes, it was looking desperately for something to eat not have any luck even in the middle of Greenleaf. It waited a second before answering.

“My name is Whitewater.” Whitewater? What a weird name for a completely black cat.

“Are you okay you look hungry and tired?” What are you thinking, you can’t bring this kittypet with you to the camp, but it could die out here. Besides I can’t stay here much longer because my kits are out here after dark…
“My kits” Flowertail shrieked.
Last edited by Frenchchilla on Wed May 02, 2007 10:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
  





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41 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 41
Sun Apr 29, 2007 8:22 pm
Layleun says...



Heeheehee, Whitewater, I knew she'd be in there. Jackie going to pop in there by any chance? It was good but the quick change from characters to an other group was a little....abrupt. Good overall.
  





User avatar
48 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 48
Wed May 02, 2007 10:03 pm
Pyxis says...



This was good overall.

The dialogue was strained. If you added some punctuation that would be much better. I loved your names- Eaglepaw and Whitewater especially.

Keep writing! :) :)

~Pyx
All the world's a stage,
And all the men and women merely players.

~William Shakespeare
  








The important thing is never to stop questioning.
— Albert Einstein