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Young Writers Society


Chapter 1



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Tue Dec 18, 2007 2:35 am
Pawprint says...



I stared at the book that lay in wrinkled Christmas wrapping paper.

"SO what do you think?" asked Grandma, as she studied my face. I looked at her with a fake smile.

"Oh, it's great Grandma!" I lied. Grandma looked at my parents with triumph as they looked back at her with worried expressions. I stared back down at the book and my fake smile now gone.

"Well, that was your last present, you may now go and read the book, " suggested Grandma with a wide smile. I nodded slowly and got up with the book in my hands as I made my way towards my room.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

"Peter Pan," I read out loud. I looked at it with disgust. This story is for little kids. My grandmother must still think I am five or something! She is eight years behind!
I threw the book to the floor and took out my CD player and turned on the music on high volume. I tapped my feet to the beat as I took out a magazine and started flipping through it. After a few minutes, I glanced towards the area where the book landed, but instead of seeing a book, I saw feet. I froze and slowly raised my eyes to find my grandmother glaring at me. I quickly snatched off my headphones and turned off the music.

"Hi Grandma," I said sweetly as I nervously glanced at the book in her hands. She didn't smile. I sighed.

"Grandma, I can explain-"

"How this book ended up on the floor?" asked my grandmother stiffly.

"Oh, it must have fallen," I suggested nervously. My grandmother just shook her head.

"Kids these days rarely read books anymore. Instead they entertain themselves with all this junk," said my grandmother as she eyed my CD player.

"Jane, you must understand that this book is more than just a story. It actually hap-"

"Mother," said my mother harshly as she appeared at my doorway. My grandmother froze and reluctantly turned around.

"Yes?" asked my grandmother.

"I must talk to you, now," said Mother and stiffly walked away. After a moment, my grandmother left without looking back. Silently, I climbed off my bed and tip-toed out into the hallway, leaned over the banister and waited to hear the voices.

"Mother, what were you thinking when you gave Jane that book?" asked my mother angrily. There was a moment of silence before my grandmother answered.

"I thought it good for her to know some history,"

"History! Mother, in reality, that never really happened!"

"Molly, I was there, I met him, and it happened!" said my grandmother stiffly.

"Mother, Jane must know nothing of this! She will live a normal life and not waste her time dreaming!" whispered my mother harshly. After that the voices were too low for me to hear. I walked back to my room dazed.

Who is him? I wondered
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111 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 4194
Reviews: 111
Mon Dec 24, 2007 5:52 pm
Gladius says...



Oooooh- Who is him? Suspense!!

Ok, critty time!!:

"SO what do you think?"

I'm guessing SO is a typo, and there should probably be a comma after it.

This story is for little kids. My grandmother must still think I am five or something! She is eight years behind!

You should have quotations here, and probably put thoughts in italics. Just a suggestion. ;)

Who is him? I wondered

Same here- quotations are your friends! :-D

Good work, though. I can't wait to see how this turns out- I'm a fan of Peter Pan stories myself. XD
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