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The Dark Angel of Peace Chapter 5



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Wed Aug 31, 2011 1:01 am
CrazyMuffinAssassin says...



After lunch, we all go to the stadium, a large field lined with bleachers.
I follow Sol, Milo, and Drew to the locker room, a room where guys go to change and shower. The teacher, a burly, red man that goes by the name of Coach Philips, enters after us. He immediately walks towards me and shoves a uniform into my arms. His Gift Scent is strong, like Faith’s, but not as earthy or feminine.
“Just because you’re meant to be some all-powerful being doesn’t mean you get any special treatment, Keeper,” he barks at me. “Suit up. We start in five.” He marches out, the door swinging shut behind him.
“He seems so compassionate,” I mutter sarcastically, pulling my shirt over my head and fold it, placing it on the bench beside me. I do the same with my jeans, pulling on the mesh gym shorts on over my boxers and the plain white t-shirt over my upper-half.
“Oh, he’s an absolute joy,” Sol agrees, rolling his eyes as he does the same.
“He’s not that bad,” Milo murmurs. “He just wants us to be the best fighters we can be.”
“Well, if being an ass gets you to that point, then he’s a fantastic teacher,” Sol scoffs, lacing up his bright yellow Converse. For the first time, I notice that he wears a golden belt around his waist. I’m only just noting this, seeing as he’s clasping it around his waist.
I also notice that instead of the uniform, Milo is putting on some sort of armor. It’s a deep black, shiny, and form-fitting. I cock my head to the side in interest. I’ve only seen something like that in Heaven, when the Angels of War are preparing for battle against the demons who torture the Believers.
“I made it,” Drew explains to me, seeing my confusion. “I made suits of armor for both Milo and Faith. I’m not much of a true fighter like they are, so I didn’t make one for myself.”
I nod. “I see.”
As soon as we all are done changing, we exit the locker room, walking onto the floor and towards the bleachers. My nose tingles strangely as a wave of different Scents hits me square in the face. I quickly cut off my senses to keep from choking on all of the Gift Scents hit me, nearly knocking me backwards with intensity.
Faith and the girls (including Echo) are waiting for us at the bottom of the steps. I see Faith’s wearing her armor as well. Hers is similar to Milo’s, only gray and fit for her figure.
“I am so pumped for Number One Day,” Faith says, punching the air. “I can’t wait to toast some of these people’s asses. It’s gonna be so fun.”
“Of course it’s fun for you,” Sky grumbles irritably. “You aren’t the one getting beat up.”
“I know. That’s what makes it fun.” Faith grins evilly, a rather… sadistic look sparking in her eye.
I raise an eyebrow to that. She enjoys other people’s suffering? And I still find her so intriguing? What is wrong with me???
“Come on, Vincent. We’d better find our seats,” Sol says, nudging me with his shoulder.
“Right.” I follow him up the steps and into the stands. We sit near the front, forming a line across the entire bench.
I sit next to Sol, of course, and Faith is on my other side. Echo sits on the other side of her, and she’s staring at me, her red-orange eyes trained on my face with such intensity that I can feel my blood boiling beneath her gaze. I turn away to talk to Sol, who is taking part in a rather animated conversation with Milo about the use of marshmallows as ammunition in a food fight.
“Hey, Sol?” I poke his side, and he jumps and turns to look at me.
“Yeah?”
“What is up with that Echo girl?”
“Whaddya mean?”
“She’s staring at me.”
Sol looks past me, but by then Echo has turned away and is in deep conversation with Sky.
“What’re you talking about?” Sol asks as he comes back to speak to me. “She wasn’t staring at you.”
“She was a second ago.” I feel my cheeks begin to burn with embarrassment as I turn to face the front.
Coach Philips walks up to us, a clipboard clenched in his giant fist, and he stops in front of Faith.
“Duraye, are you ready?” he asks her sternly, his beady eyes glinting.
Faith salutes. “Always ready, Coach.”
“Arnold, are you ready?”
“Absolutely.”
“Good, because both of you are starting today.”
Faith and Milo exchange looks. “Why?” they ask simultaneously.
“I want Keeper there to see what he’s up against,” Coach says, pointing at me accusingly. “If he’s going to study here, then he has to see the competition.”
“But Coach, Faith’s in the girls’ division,” Drew points out awkwardly.
“No shit, Sherlock,” Faith scoffs, glaring at Drew. “Coach, Milo and I haven’t fought each other in years.”
“Then that just makes things more interesting.” Coach smirks and walks off to a table set at the edge of the floor. He picks up the megaphone that is sitting on it and puts it to his lips. “I have a special treat for you guys today,” he barks into the megaphone. “Our two Number Ones are going to be battling today before we get on with the main event.”
The other students whisper amongst themselves, and I pick up little snippets of their conversation.
“Whoo, glad it’s not me!” “I totally pissed off Faith the other day…” “I called Milo ‘stupid’ and he was so mad!”
I blink, taking a huge gulp of air. They must be a big deal if everyone is afraid of them.
“Arnold! Duraye! Get your asses down here!” Coach orders loudly.
Milo and Faith comply, whispering to each other as they do so, and stand in the center of the floor. The light glints off their armor, sending dazzling sparkles every which way.
“I have to make their armor duller somehow,” Drew mutters to himself. “The light could blind somebody.”
“Are the two of you ready?” Coach snaps at the two of them.
They both nod, appearing as nervous as ever.
“I can’t believe he’s making us do this,” Milo says to Faith, his eyes trained on her face. “I don’t want to fight you again, Ayria.”
“I don’t want to fight you either, Kyunte, but we must do what we must do,” Faith murmurs, so quietly that I am barely able to pick it up, even with my highly sensitive ears.
They separate, walking to opposite sides of the field. The two of them pull out gloves, black, fingerless gloves, most likely for weightlifting.
“I also made those,” Drew tells me proudly. “They are impenetrable and grippy so they may pick up things with the material becoming worn.”
I half listen to him as he goes on and on about the chemical compounds he used to create the material for the gloves and focus on the two warriors. I watch as they both tie their hair back, likely to keep it out of their eyes. They bow to each other, their eyes never leaving each other’s faces.
The floor changes; instead of being just plain hardwood, it becomes this rocky terrain that is perfect for Faith’s Gift.
Coach blows a whistle, and they both explode.
Milo rushes at Faith with such speed that he surely could’ve knocked her over, but she jumps out of his way and leaps onto a rock that she lifted from the ground. She rotates to face Milo, but he leaps atop the boulder and bowls Faith over, knocking her to the ground. Faith spins out of his grasp, ducking beneath his arm as he takes another swipe at her and sending a crushing blow to Milo’s back. Milo falls forward, only to spring back up to punch Faith straight in the nose. Faith laughs at this and lifts her arms, two towers of rock bursting through the floor and pouring down on Milo. Pebbles shower the onlookers, and we all shield ourselves from the attacking rocks.
Milo meets the columns head-on, busting through the rock with a crashing punch. The other one catches his from behind, but he spins around with a spinning kick that breaks the cylinder down to shards. Faith growls and raises up more rock, only this time to circle around her in a cylindrical shield. It appears thick enough for even me to not be able to go through. Milo stands still for a moment, his hands clenching into tight fists. He breathes deeply, summoning up every ounce of energy he has. All of a sudden, he has a burst of energy and he flies through the wall, his fist an unstoppable force as he torpedoes through the stone. He comes out on the other side, pushing Faith through the other arch of the circle and straight into the wall. Faith gasps at the impact, her limbs splayed against the concrete wall. As Milo backs off, she falls off, revealing the Faith-shaped imprint in the wall. Milo stands over her, his face full of such passion and rage that it’s almost impossible to remember that they are best friends. His eyes are alight with excitement, and he smirks with triumph.
“Looks like I finally beat you, Ayria,” he says confidently, a smile playing on his lips.
Faith looks up at him, her face laced with cuts and her eye swelling profusely. But she still smiles, her eyes sparkling with delight at the challenge. “Don’t count me out yet, Kyunte. I still have enough energy left to defeat you. I just can’t use my earthen abilities any longer.”
“Ooo, hand-to-hand combat. Exciting,” Milo sneers delightedly.
Faith swings her foot around to knock Milo’s legs from beneath him. He jumps and brings his own foot down to slam into Faith’s stomach. Faith dodges the blow, rolling just as Milo’s foot comes down, leaving a decent dent in the floor. Faith jumps up and punches Milo in the face, sending blood and saliva scattered through the air. Milo retaliates with a snap kick to Faith’s abdomen, sending her flying backwards. She lands feet-first and comes charging back to Milo head-on. She knocks him down and pushes him back in the wall, the same one he’d shoved her into previously. Blood trickles from the edge of Milo’s mouth, and he, frowns, wiping the blood from his lips in discontent. Snarling in frustration, he attacks Faith viciously, snatching her by the waist and dragging her to him. He jumps into the air a startling amount of feet, taking a great height in doing so. The pair tip downward and begin spiraling uncontrollably, plummeting at a dangerous speed to the ground. Before they make impact, however, a large mattress-like thing explodes from the ground and cushions their fall.
“Arnold! What did I tell you about using that technique?!” Coach shouts at him, waving his clipboard angrily as he storms across the floor. His face is nearly purple, and he smacks Milo, just as he’s picking himself off the floor, across the face with his clipboard in anger.
Milo extends his hand to Faith for assistance, ignoring the enraged coach as he continues shouting obscenities at him. Faith leans against him for balance, and she looks up at him with such understanding that it’s hard to imagine them fighting.
“Sorry. I got a little carried away there,” Milo apologizes, blinking at Faith. “I know that that move wasn’t appropriate.”
“Cut the formalities, dumbass, I know you didn’t mean to. The heat of the fight, you know?” Faith shoulders him playfully. “Just, don’t kill me, okay?”
“Right.” Milo touches his nose to her forehead briefly before releasing her. He turns to Coach Philips, bowing his head. “Coach, I know that using that move was illegal. I am willing to accept the consequences for my actions.”
Coach just blinks at him. “You do realize that I could get you expelled for almost killing another student, right?”
Milo nods solemnly. “I know.”
“Well, you’re lucky I don’t. But your Number One privileges are being revoked. Instead, Sunshine will take your place.”
Sol groans beside me. “I hate it when he calls me that.”
I withhold my snickers and instead concentrate on the action on the field.
Milo appears sickly, his shoulders hunched and eyes downcast. He comes back up to join us, taking Faith’s seat beside me, for she remains on the field.

Note: This will be continued soon. Please Review!
One day, I held up this muffin. I held it up to the light, letting the gentle rays glint over the slight glaze on the mound that protrudes from its ruffled clothing. And then, I said to myself "I'm going to take this muffin and MURDER IT."
And that, was how CrazyMuffinAssassin was born.
  





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Sun Sep 25, 2011 7:37 am
Audy says...



Hey CrazyMuffinAssassin,

I'm really excited to be reviewing this, it actually held my attention all the way through, so I enjoyed it. Now, feel free to hate me for not reviewing the previous chapters, but this way I can review this chapter more objectively on its own. I certainly do want to go back and see how you've been developing these characters - they seem really fun to write xD And the plot seems kind of interesting too. From what I garner, it seems like a group of kids at a school or arena of some sort, they each have some sort of magical powers and in this chapter seem to be battling to the death? Close enough? xD Well, let's get to the review, shall we?

a room where guys go to change and shower.

We know what a locker room is, no need to clarify.

“Well, if being an ass gets you to that point, then he’s a fantastic teacher,” Sol scoffs, lacing up his bright yellow Converse


Haha, I like Sol. This dialogue here was good! You have a great handle on the characters :D

...walking onto the floor and towards the bleachers.


Walking onto the floor? What else was he supposed to walk on?

“I know. That’s what makes it fun.” Faith grins evilly


Hehe, she seems delightful.

“Whoo, glad it’s not me!” “I totally pissed off Faith the other day…” “I called Milo ‘stupid’ and he was so mad!”


Each line of dialogue should get it's own paragraph :)

so they may pick up things with the material becoming worn.


Without the material becoming worn?
but he leaps atop the boulder and bowls Faith over,


Bowls her over?

That aside, these action scenes are pretty intense! I can just imagine everything that's going on, and I don't even know exactly what their powers are- but you describe it quite well so even despite that, I still enjoyed the story! :D Hehe, certainly do not want to mess with Faith. Great job with this! I really hope you continue it!

~ As always Audy
  





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Sun Sep 25, 2011 8:21 am
LindsayG says...



Okay so Audy seems to have talked about the same things I wanted to talk about, already. So I'll just jump to the other part...THe good part, lolx

I loved the characters, and how they all seem to have this great distinctive quality, that's great wehn you're writing a novel with so many lead characters, the readers need to be able to tell each character apart, and that Assasin, you greatly achieved.

Secondly, you definitely sparked my interest as I'm sure you did Audy's as well with the plot line. The suspense was great, the dialogue, even better, and the descriptions very good.

Please please finsih this, so I can read it please!!!!!!!!

Awesome job, Assasin.... and please keep writing.

Oh yeah, and ,my favorite character will probably be Faith...lolx, what can I say, if you get a girl that's from your description pretty and kicks butt...I say Yay!!!!!

Lol.....bye....
I write because there's nothing left to say...
  








I will call them my people, which were not my people; and her beloved, which was not beloved.
— Romans 9:25