I hope you like it!
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CHAPTER TWO
It hadn’t always been like this. There was a time that was simpler and not as horrible. It felt like so long ago, even though only a year had passed since then.
I didn’t have my visions back then, the Empire was going strong, and I was still naïve to the world’s cruelties. Nothing could wrong back then, but then, it did.
*~*~*~*
*One year ago*
“Down in the valley where the green grass grows, there sat she as sweet as a rose, she sang, she sang, she sang so sweet, along came he to kiss her on the cheek, how many kisses did she get that week?” a girl chanted and jumped with the rhythm as my friend, Kirsten, and I flipped the jump ropes this way and that for double dutch. “One… Two… Three… Four…” She counted, but was out on ten.
“Okay my turn,” Kirsten said as she handed the other girl her ends of the jump ropes. “Down in the valley where the green grass grows, there sat she as sweet as a rose, she sang, she sang, she sang so sweet, along came he to kiss her on the cheek, how many kisses did she get that week? One… Two… Three… Four…”
She got out on twenty-eight.
“Great job, Kirsten!” I grinned. She was always good at double-dutch. Sometimes she liked to show off by jumping with one foot or even touching her foot with her hand. I wasn’t good at jumping though, most of the time I would fall flat on my face from tripping on the rope. So, I moved the jump ropes for everyone else instead of actually jumping.
“Now you try,” Kirsten prompted smiling at me, she tried to take my jump rope handles.
I could feel my cheeks turning red and my palms getting sweaty as I held the handles in a tight grip. Unable to come up with an excuse not to jump, I feebly said “no thanks.”
“Gwen, I did it, now it’s your turn.” Kirsten pleaded. “It’ll be fine.”
“I just, I… “
“But, Gwen-” Suddenly she jerked her head around, stared at something behind her for a few seconds, then turned back toward me. She seemed confused and a little frustrated.
“What’s the matter?” I asked.
“Well… I keep feeling like I’m being watched, but whenever I look, there’s no one there.” She glanced behind her again and I followed her gaze.
I was used to Kirsten telling me that someone was watching her. She always thought that someone was, but there would never be anyone there. Sure enough, when I looked around I didn’t see anything out of the ordinary, there were just kids coloring with chalk, playing four square, and having a game of Freeze-Tag. Behind all of them was the tall, wooden private fence that blocked the orphanage off from the rest of the world.
“I don’t really see anyone…”
“Oh.” Kirsten - whom was clearly irritated - flipped her beautiful, long hair in a dismissive gesture and we dropped the conversation.
“Okay, who’s going to jump?” The other girl asked impatiently. She held the jump ropes lazily in her outstretched hands.
Kirsten ignored her and I wasn’t sure what to say so I did too.
“C’mon you guys, who wants to jump?” She asked again, her voice edging toward bitterness.
Noticing the negative change in the girl’s voice Kirsten finally answered out of spite, “I don’t really want to play anymore, this is getting boring.”
The girl frowned, “This isn’t boring,” then she turned to me, her eyes piercing, “is it?”
I glanced at Kirsten who was glaring intensely at the other girl. They didn’t get along very well but she had the jump ropes before us, so we had to be nice to her in order to jump.
If Kirsten thought it was boring, then, well… “It’s getting a little dull.” I flinched in anticipation for the girl’s angry reply.
She huffed, then looked from Kirsten to me and mumbled in a voice full of venom “just because you’re Kirsten’s best friend doesn’t mean that you have to be exactly like her.”
That stung. I turned to Kirsten to see if she would say anything to that, but she just pursed her lips. Then, she turned to me and said “do you wanna play four square?”
Of course she wouldn’t reply to that, the girl was addressing me after all, but, I wasn’t able to say anything to her either. Anyway, would I want to play four square? “… Not really.” I wasn’t good at it and I didn’t like losing frequently in games.
“Okay, what should we do then?” She asked.
“Um,” I felt an arm around my shoulder and I turned to see that flawless chocolate-colored complexion, dark hair, and those big brown eyes that I knew so well. “Hey Henry.”
“What’s up girls?” He smiled to reveal his full white teeth.
“We’re just trying to figure out what we should do for recess,” I replied.
“A bunch of us are playing kickball, you wanna play?”
“Do you, Gwen?” Kirsten asked.
I nodded, “yeah, sure.” Kickball was really the only sport I was good at.
“Great!” Henry led us to the small gathering of kickball players. Kirsten and I seemed to be the only girls, but then I saw Nikki. She stood tall and proud, her beautiful caramel skin set her apart from the other pale and sickly girls in the orphanage. Nikki was the strongest and fastest out of all of the kids. So there was no doubt that the team captains would be fighting over who gets her on their team.
A boy named Preston called out to all of us, “okay, let’s get this started you guys. Who are the team captains?” Preston always seemed to be the one to take charge. At his words, there were many debates over who should be the captains. He quickly sorted it out though, “all right, will all the people who want to be captain step forward.” Most of the group went forward, excluding me and a few others. “Now, we’re going to vote on the captains. Who wants…” He named off the people in the group and the person who had the loudest cheering won as captain; Henry and some other boy won. Next, the team captains took turns choosing their team players. I went into Henry’s group, but Kirsten went into the other’s.
It was a fun game. One time I kicked the ball extremely far and got so excited that I accidentally mowed Kirsten right over onto the ground while running the bases. Even after many apologies, she repaid the favor. Nikki was on my team, so of course we won. She got us four home runs and gave our team six additional points, for a total of ten out of the fourteen points that we ended up with. To my surprise, I actually got our team a point. When the game ended Henry pat me on the back and said “good game” I smiled and agreed. Soon afterwards, our warden called us all in for dinner.
The macaroni and cheese jiggled at my fork’s touch. As un-appetizing as it looked, it actually tasted somewhat good. The milk was sour though. I sat with Henry and Kirsten and we talked about all of the amazing slides Nikki had done during the kickball game, and how Henry got us two home-runs.
After dinner, we all went off to finish our daily chores. This time, I had to hand wash the dishes from breakfast, lunch, and dinner. A tedious chore. But, Nikki was helping me and she made it fun by playing the radio loudly and singing and dancing along with the tune while she rinsed off and dried some plates. She wanted me to do it too, but I could feel my face flush a deep crimson and wouldn’t. After a while of seeing her singing and dancing with the radio, I felt awkward not joining in, so I quietly sang with her. Hearing my voice, she turned to me and grinned, then she grabbed a spoon to use as a microphone and held it up for both of us to sing into. My voice sounded mediocre compared to the proffesional singer’s voice and Nikki’s beautiful voice, but I tried not to notice too much or I wouldn’t be able to keep singing.
Then when the guitar solo came Nikki dropped the spoon and played her own air guitar, urging me to do it along with her. I hesitantly did. I awkwardly put my hands up and strummed the imaginary strings, I was strumming them way too slowly compared to Nikki and I could tell she wanted me to do it faster and be more animated. I attempted to do it like her and then I started to get into it, playing it how I thought the band would play it - slow at certain times and fast at others.
The warden, Miss Abby, came into the kitchen and I quickly turned off the radio so as not to get in trouble for slacking. But then she said teasingly, “why’d you turn it off? That was my favorite song!”
When we finished cleaning the dishes, I left the kitchen to go to bed. When I got to the room that Kirsten and I shared, I noticed that she was already fast asleep in the bunk above mine. So, I quietly tip-toed over to my bed and nestled into my blankets, hoping not to wake her.
Sleep overcame me instantly and I found myself nodding off.
“Sweetie, are you all right?” She stroked my hair, her concerned eyes looked into the ones with sadness in them.
“I’m fine, mom. Just tired,” I rubbed my eyes, as if to prove it.
“Oh, do you want to take a nap?” She grabbed the pillow off the couch nearby and held it up.
“No, that’s all right, I’m just gonna hang out in my room,” I got up to leave.
“Sweetheart, don’t forget that you agreed to go to the store later to pick up a few things for the house.”
“Okay,” I climbed the stairs to my bedroom.
But, my mom stopped me before I got too far, “actually, Gwen, it would be great if you could go up to the store right now.”
“Yeah, sure, no problem.” I ran up the stairs to grab my shoes and left the house to go to the bus stop.
After I bought the things on the list I was given, I came back home via bus. Bags covered my arms and it was a relief to set them down on the floor. But, when I looked up - I saw that the house was ransacked. Belongings were strewn across the floor, and a few things were missing.
“Mom?” I called out. “Mom, dad, where are you?”
No answer, only an eerie silence.
“MOM?! DAD?!” I screamed over and over, falling to my knees crying.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
I woke with a start, my breathing heavy. Another nightmare. I pushed back my hair and fixed my sheets, wiping a tear away from my eye. It was always a different dream, but it always involved my parents. I actually never even knew my mother. Nor did I know my father. They’d abandoned me at three years old and I was sent here, to Davinburke Orphanage.
I’d had these nightmares ever since I could remember and I grew used to them. When I was little though, these nightmares would get to me and I’d spend the whole night crying. But I eventually got over it.
I looked at the green LCD clock across our room, it read 3:47 AM. I shut my eyes and tried to think of something happier to help me fall back asleep, such as seeing Miss Abby sing and dance along with the radio while helping us clean the dishes. I smiled and nuzzled up to my pillow, hoping for a better dream.
It was a dreamless sleep though, and I soon found myself being woken to Kirsten shaking me and calling my name to wake up. I rubbed my eyes sleepily and yawned. Then I slowly sat up. “What’sss todayy?” I slurred and squinted, but I only saw blurs.
“It’s Friday…” Kirsten replied. “FIELD TRIP!!”
I covered my ears. It was too early for her to be yelling so loud.
“Oh, sorry,” she mumbled noticing my discomfort.
Kirsten was a morning person. I wasn’t. It usually took her a few seconds to completely wake up, while it took me a few hours.
“Where are we going?” I asked, my voice slurring a little less.
“I heard Miss Abby say that we might be going swimming,” she replied, a little quieter this time for the sake of my ears.
“Really? That’s awesome.”
“Yeah, it’ll be fun.”
“C’mon girls gettup!” Miss Abby opened our door and shouted. Being a warden, she was the one that took care of us and watched us - and told us to get up if we hadn’t already. She was young, in her late twenties, a tall and thin woman. Her sandy brown hair was put up in a messy bun and she seemed tired.
“But I’m already up.” Kirsten pointed out.
“All right, well, Gwen wake up.”
Are you serious? I collapsed from my seated position to lying down again. “But, I’m soooo tired,” I complained.
Miss Abby yanked the sheets off of me and I tried to pull them back over myself. But she dropped them to the floor where I couldn’t reach, “oh fine.” I rose from my bed and rubbed my eyes again.
Kirsten laughed and said teasingly, “yay, she’s finally up!”
“Good. Now, the sooner you get ready the sooner we can all go on our field trip.” Miss Abby coaxed.
“Are we going to go swimming for sure?” I asked.
“Yes, if we can all mange to walk to the pool without misbehaving.” Miss Abby sighed, “those boys always act up - well, most of them do, not that Henry, he’s a sweetheart.” Kirsten and I smiled, as if the compliment was toward us. “I’m glad that Mister Camden is here though, he’s a lifesaver sometimes.” Mister Camden was the male warden. “All right, well I have to go; many more kids to wake up.” She smiled and left our bedroom. Once she was out of sight, I lay back down on my bed.
“C’mon Gwen! You have to get up!” Kirsten attempted to pull me out of bed without much luck.
“Five more minutes,” I grumbled.
“No, you have to get up now!” She whined.
“I’m too tired, just let me rest.”
“Come on, let’s go.” She tugged at my arm.
“Nooo!” I moaned. “Please, just leave me alone.”
Suddenly, I felt my body moving and hands pushing my stomach. Then, before I knew it I fell onto the floor. “Hey!”
Kirsten smiled. “All right, well, let’s get ready.” She opened our shared dresser and threw some clothes at me.
We dressed and walked the bare hallways to the girl’s public bathroom and attempted to get a spot near the mirror. Many of the girls were raking at their hair with brushes or washing their faces with the water from the sink. Looking in the mirror, I saw that my curly, golden-brown hair was tangled and shot up every which way, meanwhile Kirsten’s orange colored hair was perfect - it held straight at the top and at the end near her shoulders it rippled in small waves. We brushed our hair (although Kirsten didn’t really need to) and we washed our faces like the others. My hair looked much better after being brushed, it spiraled in large curls to hang just below my shoulders. Sometimes, out of habit, I would pull on one of my curls and let go for it to slingshot back in to place.
“Are you ready?” Kirsten asked, staring in the mirror and finishing some last minute touches to her hair. Then she turned to me, inquisitive.
“Yeah, but I have to get my hat first.” I replied and opened the bathroom door about to get it, but Kirsten stopped me.
“Do you have to?”
“Yes, of course! People will stare if I don’t.”
“Gwen, they won’t stare!”
“Yes they will.” I said.
“No they won’t,” her cutting tone was one that could finish the conversation, but I was determined to get my way.
“They will.” I walked to our room, ignoring everything she said to me.
“They aren’t going to stare!” she repeated loudly several times while I rummaged through the dresser, looking for my hat. I could’ve sworn that I’d left it right on top of the nightstand in our room.
If only she could understand what my hat meant to me. “Kirsten, they will-” I started to mumble to her, but she interrupted me.
“No!”
Miss Abby came in the room, “please stop shouting girls. What’s going on in here?”
“Gwen’s trying to get her hat and I keep telling her she doesn’t need it.” Kirsten complained.
“Yes I do.”
Miss Abby wrapped her arm around my shoulder, unlike Kirsten she knew what a big deal the hat was to me, surely she’d let me wear it. “Sweetie, you don’t need your hat.” I grumbled at her words and she continued. “No one’s going to stare. If anything, they’ll be jealous of how unique you are. I wish that I had two different colored eyes.”
“No you don’t! You’re lying! Like you’d want to be a freak like me. Yeah right.” A single tear escaped my left blue eye and fell to the floor. Then another escaped my right brown eye and accompanied the other. Then, before I could stop it, I was crying hysterically, taking in sharp gasps of air every few seconds.
I had been born with two colors of eyes. And, because of it I always had the thought in the back of my mind saying that maybe my parents had abandoned me because of them. “It’s just… I just…”
“It’s all right Gwen, it’s all right,” Miss Abby comforted me, patting my back. “You can wear your hat if you feel best that way.”
I smiled tearily, “thank you.” I found my hat under my bed and pulled it down to cover my eyes. I could see, but it was harder for others to notice the difference in my eyes.
“Okay, are you ready now?” Kirsten asked.
“Yeah, let’s go.”
Kirsten was always trying to get me to not wear the hat, but I just had to.
*****
“Stay in line,” Miss Abby called out.
“Anyone who leaves the line will be sent straight back to the orphanage,” Mister Camden added with a stony face. He usually helped out during field trips, but Miss Abby was really the one in charge. Because Mister Camden was at an older age and had bad eyes and hearing, he wasn’t able to take care of so many kids. So, the authority was passed down to Miss Abby when she was hired after the previous female warden, Miss Helga, quit. Miss Helga was a bitter old woman with a short temper and nasty attitude. Most of us thought that she got so sick of us that she ran away from the orphanage and never came back. Mister Camden had said that she would visit, but after the two years since she did quit, she never did.
“Are you all ready to go?” Miss Abby asked, snapping me back to the present. We all mumbled “yes” and shuffled out the front door groggily.
It was a beautiful Summer day. The trees and grass were a healthy green color and the sun was bright, its golden rays turned the city a honey color. We went to the community indoor pool which was a lot of fun, Kirsten and I played marco polo with a few other girls, while Henry and the boys played underwater tag. We came back to the orphanage around four o’clock and took showers to wash off the chemicals from the pool.
When I came out of the shower in my bathing suit - which we had to wear whenever we showered - I wrapped my towel around my head to dry my hair faster and patiently waited for Kirsten to finish showering. After a while, I decided that she was taking too long to wait for and so I got dressed, a bad idea. The moment I finished dressing and opened the curtain to the changing room stall, she splashed me with ice cold water. My shirt was drenched and it felt like needles against my skin. I shivered and closed the curtain to keep her from splashing me again. “What was that for?!” I shrieked, still shivering from the wetness.
“For being so self-conscious! Did anyone stare at you when you had your hat off to go swimming?”
“No,” I mumbled.
“See! I told you no one would stare.”
“But-”
“But nothing, you’re perfectly fine the way you are and you need to stop covering it up!”
I huffed, but resigned from the argument. Feeling that I was safe from getting splashed again, I drew back the curtain. Kirsten was facing the floor, drying her hair with her towel. She looked up at the dark wet spot on my shirt and grinned, “you might want to run your shirt under the hand dryer. Sorry if it was cold.”
I walked over to the hand dryer by the sinks. The girl’s shower room had a bathroom in it too and I’d usually change in the stalls if the changing rooms were full. Today we were taking our time though, and apart from another girl we were the only ones there.
“Are you almost ready?” I shouted over the blaring noise of the dryer.
“Yeah, let me get dressed and we’ll go outside.”
After we finished showering, we had recess. Kirsten and I played jump rope (this time separately instead of double dutch. I was a little better at individually jump roping). And Henry ran off to play soccer with the other boys.
We were just about to challenge each other to see who could jump the longest (I already knew that Kirsten would win) when; “Kirsten Mae Barnett?” Someone asked from behind us. We turned to see a man dressed in black, wearing dark sunglasses.
“Yeah?”
“Follow me.” He walked on.
She hesitated. When the man noticed she was not following him, he beckoned for her to come. She still didn’t follow, probably too confused to move. I lightly pushed her toward the man. She was acting silly by not going with him, he was most likely someone who wanted to adopt her - although he was being very formal about it. I secretly hoped that he wouldn’t adopt her though, I didn’t know what I’d do without her.
Kirsten slowly followed the man, looking back at me with uncertainty in her eyes.
) Just practise, practise, practise!
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