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Young Writers Society


Chapter 2- Unknown



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Gender: Female
Points: 890
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Mon May 26, 2008 4:29 am
nichole_kram says...



There was a knock on the Office door. “It’s open!” Officer Dean yelled. “Carter and Bob, I want you to come in here!” He barked… Silence. “Carter? Bob? Do you hear…”

One drip of blood after another. The bullet pierced the left side of Officer Dean’s skull and came out the other, killing him almost instantly.


“May I ask how you got back so early?” Carter’s wife, Bella asked him.

“No.” Carter walked by his wife with only a peck on the cheek. He turned around. “I’m just kidding. The Mayor came and let us off early.”

“Why?” She asked him.

“Can’t you just be happy? I’m actually home in time for supper!”

“Daddy! Daddy! You’re home!” Carter’s daughter Sara came running up to him and jumped up in his arms. “Are you going to stay Daddy?” Sara asked.

“For today I am.” Carter replied. Just then the phone rang.

“Carter! Phone!” Bella yelled from the living room. She had already answered the ringing annoyance.

Carter walked up to his wife. “Who is it?” He whispered so the person on the phone couldn’t hear him.

“They said it was the Police Department. They said it was urgent.” She replied to him. Bella rolled her eyes as she figured that her husband would have to leave once more.

Carter took the phone with his wife staring at him. She heard only his side of the phone call. Which turned out like this:

“Hello… Really? … Do you know who it was? … How is this possible, I was going to visit him in about… twenty minutes…?” Bella watched her husband’s face become more and more serious by the second.

“Carter, honey, what’s going on?” Bella asked him as he hung up the phone.

“I got to go babe. I’ll be home tomorrow.” He called as he ran out the front door.


Carter reached the police station at the same time as Bob and a few other guys that he worked with. They all raced up to the front door and barged in. “Where do we need to go?” He asked the secretary.

“Which case… Officer Dean or Officer Simon?” She asked.

“You mean there were two murders?!” Carter jumped back.

“According to the records there are. Which one are you here for?” the secretary replied.

“Um… um…Dean.” Carter answered, still confused.

“OK, they are taking care of that one…” She scrambled through a dozen papers on her desk. “At Officer Dean’s office. Here are the directions on how to get there.” She handed them a paper with directions on how to get to Officer Dean’s office from the Police Department. “Sorry about the loss,” she apologized.

“Yeah.” Carter answered, thinking it was a question.

“What?” The secretary asked.

“You asked if I was sorry about the loss, and I said yes that I was.”

“No, I was apologizing to you, that I was sorry that he was gone.”

“Oh, its okay, we never got along great anyway.” Carter said as he left the building.

“Now who’s the dumb ass now?” Bob asked as Carter caught up with him.

“Oh, just shut up!” Carter jumped in his car before Bob could say anything else.

“Mind if I ride with you?” Bob asked through Carter’s window.

“Yes.” Carter complained. Bob jumped in the passenger side and sat down regardless.

“Thanks buddy.” Bob shut the door and fastened the seat belt.

“What are you doing? I said no!” Carter took the keys out of the ignition, leaned back in the driver’s seat and let out a long heavy sigh.

“No, you said you would mind if I would ride with you, you never said I couldn’t.” Bob argued. Carter leaned forward and put the keys back into the ignition and started the car. Tired of arguing he backed up the car and started driving to Officer Dean’s office. They didn’t even get half way down the road when Bob had to take charge. “Are you forgetting something?” He asked Carter.

“No.” Carter’s answer was straight.

Bob cleared his throat and tugged at his seat belt.

Carter rolled his eyes and fastened his seat belt. “You happy now?” Carter asked sarcastically.

“No, but who cares?” Bob said this with joy in his voice.

They finally reached Officer Dean’s office after about twenty minutes in the car. “We’re here!” Bob shouted as they pulled into the driveway.
“No, we are in the Land of Oz with little midgets running around! Don’t you see the yellow brick road?” Just then Tom, a midget that worked with the police, came by carrying a yellow painted brick.

“I guess you are right…” Bob admitted. “Let’s just get in there and solve this case. I already have an idea about who did it.”

“Who then?” Carter sat back in his seat and stared at Bob.

“The same person who committed the other murders, maybe he was trying to make sure no one could figure out who it was.”

“Good job, now try to run it through the boss… Oh yeah, the boss is dead!” Carter exclaimed.

Carter opened his car door and jumped out of the car. Bob did the same and followed him up to the front door. Carter jumped to the top of the three stairs that were leading to the front door and knocked on the door. James Orrien opened the door. “Carter, Bob, come on in.” James said as he stepped to the side. Both Carter and Bob stepped in the house.

“I thought this was being taken care of at his office?” Carter asked.

“It is… Officer Dean’s office is at his house. He basically had no life.” James said as he led them to the office. “This is where the body was… They already took it away.” James told them pointing into the office. All the walls of the office were painted gray. Only two out of the five lights on the fan in the room were working, and the office was only big enough to hold about five people, if they stand up. It was very boring and unfriendly. The desk was sitting against the back wall. It was very organized which made the room even more unfriendly. The pens were lined up on the desk by size. There was the biggest one, and then it kept getting smaller. Next to the pens were about five sheets of paper. All stacked in one pile where not a corner was off.
The top paper had some writing on it. It said “Bob = En” What did En mean? Did he know something about Bob no one else knew? Was En some kind of ‘secret message’ or something? When Carter couldn’t figure it out, he gave up.

“Did you get to see it?” Bob asked… Carter was about to ask that too but Bob beat him to it.

“See what?” James acted more stupid by the second.

“The body!” Carter butted in. He said it so loud everyone that was working stopped and looked at him thinking that he found another body.

“Oh, no. They took it away just as I pulled up two hours ago.”

Just then Carter’s cell phone rang. He looked at the number on the phone; it was his house’s number. “Sorry, I got to take this.” Carter apologized as he walked outside to answer his call. “Hello?” Carter asked into the phone as he answered it.

“You’re too late… You blew it; you could have had a nice family if you didn’t have to except this case. Now it’s over, and now you don’t have anyone to come crying home to when you fail this case.” The unknown caller had a very raspy voice. It was almost scary.

“Who are you? And what did you do to my family?!” Carter yelled into the phone. But all he heard was a laugh on the other end of the phone, and then a click. The unknown caller had hung up. Carter quickly ran to his car without telling anyone what he was doing or where he was going. He started the engine in a hurry. That is when Bob heard him. Bob ran out to see Carter backing up almost hitting another car, and then he started to drive off. Bob already knew something was wrong, most likely with Carter’s family.
When he reached home all the lights were off. But their other car that Bella drives was still in the driveway. It was a green pickup truck that could only fit two people in it. But that was okay for them because Carter was never home, and when he was he could always use his tan SUV which could fit six people into it.

Carter raced out of his car and ran into his house. “Bella?! Sara?! Where are you?” He yelled. He ran through the kitchen, and the dining room, then Sara’s room, that’s when he stopped. He turned back. Sara was lying on her bed, with her back facing up, peaceful and quiet. “Sara?” He whispered with a shaky voice. “Look at me Sara…” She didn’t move. Sara laid in her place motionless, like a rug waiting for someone to walk on it.

Carter flipped his daughter over. Tears sprang to his eyes. She was dead; several knife marks pierced her stomach and neck. He picked her up in his arms and cradled her. He moved the blankets back and put her back in her bed. He tucked her in and kissed her head. Then he said goodnight and good-bye to her for the very last time. “I love you.” He said stepping back from the edge of her bed. “I’ll see you in heaven, my little angel.” He walked out of her room and into the master bedroom where he figured that his wife laid. He was right. Peacefully, but also stabbed, she lay in her bed in the same position as Sara. He covered his wife with blankets also and kissed her on her head. “I’ll miss you baby.” He said leaving his room and walking to the kitchen.

He grabbed the phone and sat down on the couch in the living room. He called the police to his house for a change. They came ten minutes later. Carter was still sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. That is when Bob walked up to him and sat down beside him. “It’s okay.” Bob offered.
“No, it’s not okay! It’s all my fault! If I wouldn’t have taken this case none of this would have happened! I lost the only thing I had left in this world that I loved! Now I am a murderer that should be sent to my grave, just do me a favor, do it fast.” Carter cried.

Bob hugged him, “I’m not going to kill you, you didn’t know that any of this would have happened. None of us did.”

Carter pushed away from Bob. He ran through the kitchen and out the back door to the back yard. Bob walked through the kitchen and out the window he watched Carter sitting on a lawn chair crying. Then the next thing happened so fast that Bob had no clue it was coming.
  





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145 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 1090
Reviews: 145
Sun Jun 15, 2008 10:20 am
deleted2 says...



Heeeya

Here I am again, commenting on part 2 ! I like the theme of your story :DD

I enjoyed it, and think you leave it with excellent suspense! Well done on that. Let me know when more of this story is put up because I'd like to review it, too.

Take care and happy editing!

XxxDo
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Every first draft is perfect, because all a first draft has to do is exist.
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