Young Writers Society

I can't see how anybody should care, but this is an experience I completely underestimated until I experienced it, and I feel like I need to get it out...

I was twelve years old when I read Kurt Vonnegut's "The Kid No One could handle" from his rather well known collection "Welcome to the Monkey House". In this particular story, Vonegut periodically describes the troubled child character as to have "oyster eyes". It wasn't until two years later that I realized what he meant.
I saw a hard sculpted human face holding absolutley no trace of emotion whatsoever. The lips were thin and straight, the skin was marbled and pale, there was no muscle out of place. It was the face of a corpse.
And the eyes, they were just pure black abysses. They were deep, deep, portholes into emptiness. Complete, utter emptiness. The eyes were looking at me, though there was no person there, just blackness. Black, large, stones with a sparkled ring of blue around the edge.
It literally took the breath right from my lungs, like I had been punched directly in the gut. That face was so awfully vaccant, that I wasn't even sure if it could be called human.
I stared at nothingness. I saw a face with no soul. I saw eyes with no person behind them.
And it terrorfied me.

Hi there AubrielRose! You have a very pretty username, by the way

First things first, next time you post something on YWS, giving it the simplest proof-read might help you develop some good post-writing, pre-posting habits and it will also help us reviewers There are a quite a few spelling errors and typos here that can easily be fixed without someone else proofreading it.

Also, when things are posted in 'Other', it's always a little challenging to review mainly because you don't know what it is. Here, I think I'll review it as a sort of mini essay or creative response. Which it sort of is.

As for writing mechanics go, when referring to a short story, it's always put in "quotations" and when mentioning a book of anything, it's either italicized or underlined. My personal preference is underlining, however, and it's what the majority of people I know do.

For example:

"The Kid No One could handle"

is fairly correct except even more correct should be "The Kid No One Could Handle".

"Welcome to the Monkey House"

as this is the title of a book, it should be: Welcome to the Monkey House.

I'm not going to point out all your spelling errors - in fact I will point out none. However, simply using a spell-checker in Pages on an Apple computer or MS Word on a PC can fix things in seconds. If you don't have a spell-checker, you could always use this fairly simple-to-use online spell-checker.

If you have any questions about this, please don't hesitate to shoot me a PM.

Yours,
Lavvie

PS. It's Kurt Vonnegut with two letter Ns. Not Kurt Vonegut.

My name is actually Aubriel Rose by the way.
And I know how to spell Vonnegut I just kind of had a brain glitch. Oops.