Young Writers Society

So, little more depressing than what I've posted before, but I wrote this a while back, when I was feeling pretty damn depressed. I still do, but that's beside the point. I'm not sure where this belonged, but if that's somewhere else, I guess it can be moved.

---

She's alone and she hates it. Everywhere she turns, something stands in her path. Vile, disgusting creatures ready to attack and tear her down. She cannot go back; she never could. Behind is a maelstrom anger and self-loathing that is ready to comsume her if she dares to look back.

She has people to turn to, but they only keep her safe for so long. It's not long before she's cornered by the demons once again. She does her best to fight back but at time's it's just too much to handle.

Her family and close friends worry, but there is nothing that they can do. They are her demons to defeat but she cannot do it. Every solution she tries to find is thrown back in her face, rejected by the world around her.

Then the cycle starts again.

I really liked this. I really did. If it's what I'm thinking, are the demons representing depression? If I'm just being clueless, I'm sorry. =P

She's alone and she hates it. Everywhere she turns, something stands in her path. Vile, disgusting creatures ready to attack and tear her down. She cannot go back; she never could. Behind is a maelstrom anger and self-loathing that is ready to comsume her if she dares to look back.

She has people to turn to, but they only keep her safe for so long. It's not long before she's cornered by the demons once again. She does her best to fight back but at times it's just too much to handle.

Her family and close friends worry, but there is nothing that they can do. They are her demons to defeat but she cannot do it. Every solution she tries to find is thrown back in her face, rejected by the world around her.

Then the cycle starts again.

Firstly, why is she alone? Why can't she ever go back? This reminds me of Buffy the Vampire Slayer because of the way she can't go back, xD Anyway, why does she hate being alone? Maybe you could add just a little bit of detail and background to that part.

Second, why does she fight demons? Is she like Buffy; it's her destiny to fight demons? Or is this all a metaphor, and the demons stand for depression? If so, I can totally relate to that, unfortunately. Depression is just disgusting.

This is a really great piece. It makes you think and it makes you wonder, and that's very good. Keep it up!

Kudos to you.

The one word title was very emotional and I like it, it conveys so much of your entry.

The only, and very small, part I seemed to misinterpret is the clarity of your piece, I think, in my opinion that it may need more description because it was really good.

Albeit that, let me thank you for an opportunity like this.

Very Seriously,
Al

I know it probably does, but at the time I wrote it, I honestly was more focused on, well, ranting at my notebook than anything else really. You're welcome all the same though.