An Odd Life Escape into Normal Life!
By Bob.
Two of the characters from the ever popular humorous short story, ‘An Odd Life’, written by Sureal, recently escaped into the real world, causing great confusion and panic (not only have the character’s terrorised the public, but this amazing feat also defies all known laws of physics).
So – how did this happen? This reporter has interviewed a large number of respectable scientists, and the general gist of their reply has been, ‘Look, we don’t fucking know, alright?’
Rather oddly, the two characters (known only as ‘Chris’ and ‘Ted’) have been aiming mostly at the writing website, ‘The Young Writers Society’ (AKA YWS).
The vast majority of philosophers agree that this is probably due to the fact that their story is only available on that site.
The remaining minority of philosophers believe that this entire thing was made up in the twisted mind of an all together not-to-stable teenage boy. But these philosophers also smell, so who cares what they have to say?
This reporter tracked down and interviewed the author – Sureal – to see what he had to say…
‘So,’ I asked him, ‘Why do you think this has happened?’
‘No.’
‘You mean you don’t know?’
‘Yes.’
‘You have no idea?’
‘No.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘Yes.’
‘So you have absolutely no idea at all?’
‘No.’
‘But you must have some idea.’
‘Yes.’
‘Great! What is it?’
‘No.’
‘What?’
‘Yes.’
‘… Who are you?’
‘No.’
‘Are you Sureal?’
‘Yes.’
‘Are you sure?’
‘No.’
‘Are you okay?’
‘Yes.’
‘That’s good to know.’
‘No.’
It later turned out that Sureal was suffering from a rare mental disorder.
Back to Ted and Chris, some of their victims have kept a short record of their encounter with the terrible pair.
For example, Gazza14 had a number of terrible encounters with them. In his infinite wisdom, he decided to make a short recording of his final meeting with them.
Gazza_14 has joined channel #the_young_writers_society
<Gazza_14> Oh god no!
<Chris_464> Hm?
<Gazza_14> Not Ted and Chris!!!
<Ted> I like peanut butter
.
<Gazza_14> I think I just went mad *jumps from window*
Rather unfortunately, this recording also doubled as his suicide note.
However, not everyone sat back and just took the random abuse. Some fought back. For example, the ever vigilante Firestarter (AKA ‘Jack’).
<Ted> ... I like cats
<Chris_864> You do?
<Ted> Yes. Cats are pretty
<Firestarter> Ya mam's pretty!!!
<Chris_864> His mum is a gorilla…
<Chris_864> I would not aggravate her if I were you.
<Firestarter> She wasn't aggravated last night…
<Firestarter> Much the opposite.
<Ted> Huh?
<Firestarter> Oh, nothing…
Unfortunately, Firestarter is now deceased, crushed to death by his secret lover.
Does a bad fate come to all that encounter the terrifying Ted and Chris? This reporter certainly thinks so.
So, should you see them coming, run…
Run for your dear life…
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