Young Writers Society

It is a city, a small one. It is the city of our birth if not the city of our childhood and adolescence. We used to see it as a very small city with no infra structure, with no places for our big dreams.
We said that we couldn’t wait for the moment of leaving behind us those insignificant things .the moment that gives us the chance to see the real world. I mean here with the real world big cities with big opportunities, new things to discover and to do in your free time. Before, we use to visit friends and hanging out for hours. We use to smile a lot and to laugh for anything. I think that we use to live in that small city. Yes, we cried and we had bad times but as I remember we were always near of people we love. Even the bad times look like good ones now.
I remember the smiles and I remember the mills I use to walk with my friends till the school, the college and the high school too. I remember how the air was, how we felt cold at winter and how the sun made us feel so worm at summer. I remember how I was happy for getting older and smarter. I remember meeting good people. I still have in mind how they were and how they made me feel. People that I will never forget all my life long, who were here for me whenever I needed them, with whom I spent my good and bad times.
I remember feeling like that we will never miss the city or the people because we will be busy with our new lives, but once I was outside I felt like losing my soul . It is very true that I came visit the small city sometimes but it is never the same thing. We use to feel that we live in that city .now we feel that we are traveling to this wonderful place and we already know that we can’t stay for a long time.
For many of us it is a big honor to be apart of this small world .the world of simplicity, generosity and kindness. For others they feel ashamed of being from our small heaven. I guess because they didn’t see the suffering of the other places or because they are so blinded by the superficial things in big cities. I mean here they didn’t live in big cities for a long time to see how much they are uninhabitable. I don’t say that big cities are that bad because they use to have their proper details and pure beauty but now I am feeling sorry for their conditions. The majority of people in big cities forget totally about details and small things that make us feel at ease, happy and give us peace of mind. It is nearly rare to find people with souls and pure hearts because everyone is a collecting money machine now. They don’t have the time to feelings and morals. But we must never say that all big cities people are like that, because wherever you go there are good people and bad people. Even in our small heaven there are some heartless people except the rate is different.
I just want to salute the people of Ouarzazate city ,my beloved city , I want to tell them that I’m really proud of being one of them and that I love them because they are unique with their big hearts.
Ouarzazate, our stories started at your streets, our past memories are left inside your boundaries. Our futures may be fascinating in other cities but you will for eternity be the city that tells our stories,the city that we miss everywhere; the city of our past and last times. You will be always the fascinating small city .Our own Hollywood where memories are the details of so many movies with real stories and real actors.

This story is great, I love this part: "I remember how I was happy for getting older and smarter. I remember meeting good people. I still have in mind how they were and how they made me feel. People that I will never forget all my life long, who were here for me whenever I needed them, with whom I spent my good and bad times."
It's just a really down to earth, realistic piece of text. There are a few grammatical mistakes but that's just me being picky. The content is wonderful and this a fantastic piece of work, well done!!!

Hulloooo! Great title -- just thought I'd put that in first, before I start with the actual nitpicks and such.

It is a city, a small one.

Great line, but something just irked be about it. Like ... I don't even know. I was trying to figure it out. I even consulted Microsoft Word 2007, whose consensus was that it as neither a comma splice or a fragment. Now, maybe I'm just going mad with some sort of infatuation with semi-colons and dashes, but that's what I feel like it should be; a dash.

It is a city -- a small one.

As I'm not certain, I'd suggest someone more knowledgeable about this sort of thing, or just see if it fits for you.

It is the city of our birth(?) if not the city of our childhood and adolescence.

I'm thinkin' I can see a bit of a comma in there.

It is the city of our birth, if not the city of our childhood and adolescence.

So this is your second paragraph. The changes I've made are in bold.

We said that we couldn’t wait for the moment of leaving behind us those insignificant things-- the moment that gives us the chance to see the real world. I mean, here with the real world, and big cities with big opportunities, there were new things to discover and to do in your free time. Before, we used to visit friends and hangout for hours. We use to smile a lot and to laugh at anything. I think that we used to live in that small city. Yes, we cried and we had bad times but as I remember we were always near the people we love. Even the bad times look like good ones now.

So there were quite a few grammar mistakes in that paragraph alone -- and others. I tended to overlook quite a few of them, so you might want to read it over, as some of the things just don't seem to mesh together very well. One thing that kind of bugged me while reading this was the use of "use" and "used"

We used to do this ...

That is my example of using the word "used" -- as it is the past-tense of the word "use".

Now, you often used the word "use" in your past tense. I'm not sure if you did that simply because that's the way a lot of use say it, but unfortunately it does not go that way. "Used" is for the past tense; "use" is for the present.

All-in-all though, I think this was good. It just goes to show the way we take life in a small town for granted, because suddenly you have something you want, and it isn't what you need. Coldplay was very wise that way.

Toodles, happy writing!