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Gigaman : A Very Bad Pun.



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Sat Apr 10, 2010 6:54 pm
Esther Sylvester says...



This little story is just to be random and to have fun! Rated 12 and up for some random violence.

THE CAST!

GIGAMAN

FLUFFY

PINEAPPLE MAN

HAPLESS ORPHAN

MEGA TOAST

HAPLESS PEDESTRIAN

NARRATOR

DANCING CHICKS

ANGEL ON HIGH
______________

SETTING: A place on earth!

______________


Won,t00, tree, GO!


NARRATOR: You've heard of Megaman, you've heard of Superman...now introducing, GIGAMAN!

(Three dancers appear in a cloud of smoke. They begin singing the Gigaman theme song)

DANCER CHICKS:
Gigaman! Gigaman!
Does whatever a normal man can!
With his fists, he will punch.
If he isn't too careful, he will be lunch.
LOOK OUT!
Here comes Gigaman....



(Gigaman appears and bows.)

GIGAMAN: Thank you, thank you. You have tugged my heart strings like those little beggar children that I give huge sums of money to out in the streets....

(Scene cuts to an orphanage with a child sitting out in front of it.)

GIGAMAN: Ah, an orphan! Have some money, orphan! (Hands orphan a penny)

HAPLESS ORPHAN: Hey, this is just a penny! How the heck am I supposed to live off of a PENNY!?

(Scene cuts to reality)

GIGAMAN: Ah, yes. Good times.

NARRATOR: Now, Gigaman man may be perfect in every single way, but every super hero has issues too! Isn't that right, Gigaman?

GIGAMAN: Um, no.

NARRATOR: Ah, Gigaman, don't be modest! Tell the truth.

GIGAMAN: Well, I guess I've always have had problems with my catch lines...(FLASHBACK)

(FLASHBACKS to GIGAMAN protecting the City from a giant mutated toast)

MEGATOAST: AHA! You shall never defeat me!

GIGAMAN: Ha! By the time I'm done with you, you will be toast.

(Awkward silence)

HAPLESS PEDESTRIAN: Ah, that line was so bad I think I might die! (dies)See, I did.

MEGATOAST: But...I am ALREADY toast. It's in the name.

GIGAMAN: Yes, which is why my line was so clever and endearing!

MEGATOAST: ...I'm done here.

(Scene cuts back to reality)

GIGAMAN: Oh what am I saying? That line was brilliant!

NARRATOR: Gigaman, have you ever thought about getting professional help with your catch line issues?

GIGAMAN: What? You simply can't be serious! I do not need help with my wit!

(GIGAMAN signal wails)

GIGAMAN: Ah, the Gigaman signal! I must be off to fight EVIL! (leaves)

NARRATOR: I sense some internal conflict supported with a lot of angst is going to fuel this plot line...

DANCER CHICKS: Um, can we get payed now?

(Scene cuts to evil lair. Pineapple Man is hovering over his evil doomsday machine )

PINEAPPLE MAN: Ha ha ha ha! With this complex and impossibly ornate disintegrating ray, I will be able to rule the world!

(GIGAMAN drives through evil lair walls with the Gigamobile(tm). He gets out of the car.)

GIGAMAN: Not so fast, Pineapple Man!

PM: Egad! It is my rival of rivalness of all things rival, GIGAMAN! And his annoying sidekick, Fluffy!

FLUFFY: I have no purpose!

PM: I think it should be YOU who is to be cowering in the fear! Behold, my disintegrating ray!

GIGAMAN: Oh noes!

PM: Aha ha ha.. You stink, GIGAMAN!

GIGAMAN: Hmm..I think this the time for a good catch phrase. (Eats a banana and holds the peel up in the air) Give up now or I will give you the slip!

(AWKWARD PAUSE)

FLUFFY: My weak mind cannot take the horrible catch line! I am stunned!

PM: But I am evil so I am not! Eat disintegrating beam Fluffy! (Shoots FLUFFY with ray)

FLUFFY: Gah, my atoms! (disintegrates into a pile of dust)

GIGAMAN: No! FLUFFY! It is all my fault! If I had not stunned him with my horrible line then he would be alive right now. This will be horrible for my reputation!

PM: I suggest that we just sweep this under the rug!

GIGAMAN: Good point.

(PINEAPPLE MAN and GIGAMAN sweep FLUFFY's DUST under a rug)

PM: Good. Now that this is dealt with...I hate you GIGAMAN!

GIGAMAN: You shall pay for this! You! Shall! Pay!

(GIGAMAN leaps at PM and kicks his butt)

PM: My butt! It has been kicked! You won't get away with this Gigaman!

GIGAMAN: And yet I will. (Stands and grimaces)

PM: Aren't you going to kill me?

GIGAMAN: Normally, I would. But my hatred and constant longing to kill you is my purpose of life. Without you, I am nothing. Go along now.

PM: You'll regret this! Now for my escape! MONSTER!

(MONSTER bashes through walls)

MONSTER: I am a monster! Yays!

PM: Good bye, Gigaman!(Exits with MONSTER)

GIGAMAN: Rats, he got away. (Runs over to rug)Oh Fluffy, I wish I could bring you back to life...

ANGEL ON HIGH: But you can, GIGAMAN!

GIGAMAN: I can? How can I?

ANGEL ON HIGH: You must bring his dust to the Fountain of Water, the only fountain in the world that has actual running water. There, he will be alive.

GIGAMAN: I-I-I..I will do it! (Sweeps up dust of FLUFFY) Let's go Fluffy!

Will GIGAMAN find the Fountain of Water? Will FLUFFY come back to life? Will GIGAMAN ever be able to pull a proper catch phrase again? Tune in next time for the next episode of GIGAMAN!

(RUN CREDITS with theme song in the background)

:thud: -woo!
Last edited by Esther Sylvester on Mon Apr 19, 2010 2:41 am, edited 2 times in total.
It's writing prompt week on my blog a very random pickle!:
http://veryrandompickle.blogspot.com/
  





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Sun Apr 11, 2010 10:34 pm
Navita says...



Well...this was certainly another bit of light humour I've read this morning. I thought 'megaman, superman, gigaman' was a cool transition - and I'd love to see you do something more with it than this almost-cartoony scene of characters like mega-toast and those 'bad puns.' I have a feeling...Gigaman might just be the next Superman, with a bit of luck. But you KNEW we needed new antiheros, new characters, which is why, I guess, you created them - I have to say, I think that you could invent even better characters for the villains using the same transition you did for gigaman. Nice one!
  





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Mon Apr 12, 2010 8:51 pm
Nebesah says...



this was so terribly cheesy that I loved it.

profession help


this should be professional help, but other than that, i found no gramatical errors.

Your story made me laugh a whole lot and I loved it to no end. I will definitely read the next section you write.

Toodles!
My sister: I'll never forget that day... It was raining wasn't it?
Me: ...no.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Need a review? PM me and I will take care of it. :]

**previously known as EAHailstone**
  





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Fri May 07, 2010 12:58 pm
skutter11 says...



I liked this one! You used a lot of humourous devices here and very effictivly at that. I liked this bit:
PM: But I am evil so I am not! Eat disintegrating beam Fluffy! (Shoots FLUFFY with ray)

FLUFFY: Gah, my atoms! (disintegrates into a pile of dust)

GIGAMAN: No! FLUFFY! It is all my fault! If I had not stunned him with my horrible line then he would be alive right now. This will be horrible for my reputation!

PM: I suggest that we just sweep this under the rug!

GIGAMAN: Good point.

I think you have done a good job writing this and hoping to read more of your work in future!
"Madness rides the Star wind"

HP Lovecraft. Ironic, no?
  








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