Rated because of the slight use of swear words.
Can’t you just choose between me and him? Those words kept echoing in my head, and every time, I had an urge to open my mouth and say them. It’s just a sentence. A few words put together for a meaningful, fucking sentence.
I looked around, passing a hand through my hair nervously. There weren’t many students in the library, and most of them were hunched up over a book or loose sheets of paper. What was I doing here anyways? I didn’t have a test to study for; projects that were due, or even research of any kind... No, but you do need peace and quiet, I thought. I sighed and a girl looked at me, annoyed. My eyes traveled down to the table beside me, watching the intricate pattern in the wood before them.
I had to go see her. This was driving me crazy, and I knew that the earlier I talked to her, the better it would be. At least, I hoped so. The words he had sent her kept appearing behind my eyelids, and no matter how hard I tried to forget about it, I couldn’t. I had tried to act as normal as I could today, really. I had tried so hard, you had no idea. By the end of the day though, I couldn’t even look her in the eyes. He kept materializing close to her whenever I saw her. I felt like I had soaked in jealousy all day.
Can’t we just hang out? I know ur close with Nathan... I still wanna see u tho.
My name written like that on her cellphone screen... When it had vibrated, I hadn’t really wanted to read the message. I just wanted to open it so it would stop vibrating. When I saw his name though, I was curious. Why would he be texting her? Probably to advise her of another one of their meetings for the student council. I didn’t expect those words though. After that, I had to go see the other messages. My fingers moved so fast, my heart beating hard against my ribs. Plenty of messages, more and more flirting. The worst was the feeling that had grown inside of me. I had sincerely though that she was mine, although we weren’t officially together.
I pushed up from the table I was sitting at. My breath was deepening, on the verge of hyperventilating, I had to get out. I almost ran down the few hallways to the doors that lead outside. When I reached the fresh air, I took a deep breath, letting it swirl inside my lungs. I walked, feeling like I had to do something. Anything to distract me. Turned out it didn’t do much. She was leaving the school too, walking towards the parking lot. She saw me and she smiled, stopping in her tracks to wait for me. I didn’t want to go see her, walk by her side, make conversation... But my legs decided anyways, and it only took a few seconds to be there, facing her. Her brown eyes traveled down my body, taking me in.
“Hey, what are you doing at school? I thought your mom asked you to be home early today,” she said, the wind carrying the notes to my ear.
“I had to do some work,” I lied. I was way too proud to admit that I actually didn’t know what I was doing here.
“You’re done now?” She asked, a smile stretching her soft lips. Her eyes twinkled, almost like there were a million Christmas lights in them.
“Yeah. Listen, I have to ask you something,” I said, and clamped my lips together. Why did I just say that? I asked myself. Her eyes were concerned, carefully searching mine. I opened my mouth once again, it had to be done.
“I know there’s something between you and Sean. I... I thought what we had...” I couldn’t find the strength to finish my sentence. Instead, she answered, she already figured out what I was trying to say.
“We do. It is... I mean,” she hesitated a few seconds. “I like Sean, he’s a nice guy. I like you too,” she said quickly.
“Do you like me more?” I felt like such a jerk asking her that, but I had to know. I wasn’t going to humiliate myself if she was into another guy. “He wants to go out with you, you know that? So do I,” I said, closing my eyes.
“I don’t know. I like you both...“ I opened my eyes.
“It might be a good idea to start thinking about that. I’m not going to share you,” I said, voice harsh against the wind. Her eyes filled with water, and she caught a tear with her index finger. Her mouth opened and closed, she was lost for words. I turned around; ready to walk out when she called out my name.
“Nate...” Whispers, making my heart stop beating. I turned again, watching her sobbing, her head bent, and hands hiding her face from my view. She took them away, revealing a tear soaked face. I took a few steps, taking her in my arms. I couldn't leave, not like that. Not ever. I had to fight until the end for this girl.
She pressed her face in my chest, sobbing even harder.
“I love you. Really, I do. But I love him too,” was all I could hear between two sobs.
---> 
<3
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