z

Young Writers Society


Due to popular demand a Doki Doki follow-up



User avatar
44 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 890
Reviews: 44
Mon Dec 06, 2004 4:50 am
WinterGrimm says...



Cameron Reeves… what can I say about the kid? Well for one thing, he’s about the smartest guy I’ve ever met. Lord knows if I mention the Aeneid to any other high school kid and they think I’m talking about a flower. He’s kind on the tall, skinny side. Not a bad thing in the least in my humble opinion. He doesn’t dress all that well, he’s got this t-shirt and jeans thing that he found and he’s sticking to it like glue. Like half of them half these huge-eyed sappy cute anime girls with giant boobs wearing one step above a bikini. Today he decided to switched it up. Instead of Sailor Moon’s sluttier cousin he’s got a t-shirt that had a bunch of Japanese kanji on the front, and then faded jeans with little holes in the knees. Which may have been cool a few years ago but the grunge scene went out when Curt Cobain ended himself as far as I’m concerned. He’s got kind of a anime geek meets grunge meets Ichabod Crane. Not the icky one from the Disney cartoon, but the cute one that Johnny Depp played in Sleepy Hollow.

“Hey Cassie, what’s up?” Eliza asked. She has phased into reality as she normally does. I have no idea how she’s able to converge on me no matter where I am. “Hey cool dye job.”

Now you must know right about now that I never have decided on a hair color that I wanted to keep and I change it every three to four days. Right now my hair was a Bold Blue with subtle highlights of Violent Violet. Hair dyes always have such interesting names for their colors. I look at my bangs, nearly forgetting that I had, indeed dyed my hair that morning. “Oh, yeah, thanks.”

“Good morning Cassidy.” Melissa speaks and I nearly jump because she’s snuck up on me again.

I give her a cordial smile. “Hey there.”

“Did you get the math homework?”

“Umm… yeah.” I don’t know why she had to ask. I always do my work, unlike her, and I know that she’s going to ask me if she can copy off…

“Yeah, I kinda had a date and I totally spaced it so can I copy off you?”

“Yeah. Sure.”

“Oh, thank you so much Cass you are a GODDESS.”

“Of coarse I am.”

Melissa disappears.

I look around for her. “How does she do that?”

“Oh, its easy to sneak up and away from you Cass you’ve always got your mind in the clouds.” Eliza oh-so-cleverly pointed out.

“I do not.” I nearly formed the words when, speak of the devil, I saw Cameron. He was sitting outside of Mrs. Feilding’s classroom looking rather alone and morose. No, he’s certainly thinking about something. I should go say hi. I mean what can it hurt. I’ve still got plenty of time before class and…

“Cassi-O.”

“Huh?”

“See what I mean. Head in the clouds.” Eliza looks over to Cameron and then to me. “So has he asked you out yet.”

“No. I talk to him, but I don’t think he likes me that much.”

Eliza shook her head. “Oh my GOD. You cannot be that dense. He’s totally crushing right now. Look at him.”

Now he looks somewhere between anxious and confused.

“He’s totally thinking about what you look like naked right now.”

“No way!” I shouted. Then lowered my voice immediately hoping no one heard me. “No way. He’s not some kind of lowlife pervert.”

“Every boy’s a pervert. The difference is how well the control it.”

“Well I’m going to go say hi.”

“Try not too make out for too long you do have to get to class.”

Now before I could turn and say something like “I’m not a slut like you are” she was gone. Damnit. I think my friends have had some sort of super secret ninja training without even telling me.

I wanna be a ninja.

I shake myself out of my shinobi laded fantasy world and suddenly Cameron’s right there in front of me. I’m a little closer than I mean to be because I look up and can see his nose hairs. I step back. “Hey Cam.”
And he says… nothing.

He looks at his shoes for a few seconds then looks at me, then his eyes quickly shoot to the ceiling. He wears black-rimmed glasses but I noticed his eyes are dark brown, but with green in them. Cameron’s hair is a little on the long side for a guy, probably a few inches shorter than mine. Its kind of a Keanu in The Matrix kind of a due, parted in the middle and stopping in the middle of his ears. He’s got a little goatee going on his chin, either that or a Van Dyke, or maybe it’s a Soul Patch. I can never keep straight which on is which. I mean why do they call it a Van Dyke anyway I mean the only Van Dyke I ever knew of was Dick Van Dyke and in Merry Poppins he didn’t have any beard at all. Come to think of it he was a pretty well shaved guy throughout his career.

Cameron sits and thinks for another few seconds. I wonder what he’s thinking about. Probably something very deep and provocative. I go up on my tip toes. Maybe he didn’t hear me. And here I am standing like a dope in front of him and he’s waiting for me to say something. I begin to repeat my greeting.

“Hi.” He says.

Hmmph. A rather uninspiring response. Perhaps he can’t be bothered with small talk amidst his philosophical meanderings. I slump. If only I were a better conversationalist with boys this would be far less akward.

“How are you?”

Ah, the famous how are you. “Good.” I say. Not like he saw that one coming, very smooth Cass. Very smooth. “How are you?” The old return how are you. Now the conversation could go from lukewarm to boiling over.

“Oh, I’m great.”

He’s doing great. That’s…. “Great.” I say. Then I realize I just mirrored what he just said. Once again proving that I am a complete and total airhead. Stupid, silly, Cassidy. There he goes again into one of his strange mental meanderings.

After another second or two he says. “Well I gotta get to class.”

I shrug my shoulders. “Kay, well, I’ll see you later then.”

Sigh. Gotta get to class. There’s like eight minutes before class starts and he only has to get from Room 235 to 235. I knew it. Eliza’s full of it. Cam’s not interested in me at all.

I’m going to go get a soda. Mmmmm… soda.
That love is suffering is easy to see, for before the love becomes equally balanced on both sides there is no torment greater, since the lover is always in fear that his love may not gain its desire and that he is wasting his efforts.
Andreas Cappelanus, The Art of Courtly Love
  





User avatar
665 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 6165
Reviews: 665
Thu Dec 09, 2004 5:23 am
Chevy says...



hm...very intriguing...thats all i can really say...intriguing. when it comes to stories, however, im not necessarily good with commenting and suggesting. however, the way that the characters talk seems a little unrealistic to me...but that may just be me.
  





User avatar
103 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 103
Thu Dec 09, 2004 6:11 am
Tessitore says...



I loved the sequal still, but I think I like it much better when you write from a guys perspective. You are a guy, aren't you? You better be, cause that's how I picture you, and if you aren't, then my whole mental-picture bit is just going to be thrown way outa wack. Not a good thing.

It'll be interesting if you write another one from the boys perspective... they meet... at the soda machine. Heh.

Sorry for not offering more critisism, but it's the best I can do at the late hour.
I'm not even angry... I'm being so sincere right now.
Even though you broke my heart.
And killed me... And tore me to pieces.
And threw every piece into a fire.
-"Still Alive"- GLaDOS
  





User avatar
44 Reviews



Gender: None specified
Points: 890
Reviews: 44
Thu Dec 09, 2004 6:20 am
WinterGrimm says...



CarsandGuitars77 wrote:hm...very intriguing...thats all i can really say...intriguing. when it comes to stories, however, im not necessarily good with commenting and suggesting. however, the way that the characters talk seems a little unrealistic to me...but that may just be me.


explain. please.
That love is suffering is easy to see, for before the love becomes equally balanced on both sides there is no torment greater, since the lover is always in fear that his love may not gain its desire and that he is wasting his efforts.
Andreas Cappelanus, The Art of Courtly Love
  





User avatar
162 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 162
Mon Jan 24, 2005 11:04 pm
nickelpickle says...



more, more and MORE!!!

btw, i loved it
  





User avatar
683 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 683
Tue Jan 25, 2005 8:20 pm
Emma says...



Kool, keep it up. Though I wouldnt say thats the best work I've seen. P.s if you look at mine you'd find it crap compared to yours!
  





Random avatar


Gender: None specified
Points: 1212
Reviews: 241
Thu Feb 03, 2005 6:46 pm
Harley says...



this was really dood, but pleeease! i want them to meet! :D
  





User avatar
82 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 82
Sun Dec 02, 2007 12:52 pm
chayonz says...



is there more??! Plz say there is!
h a y o n :)

nobody is perfect. thats why pencils have erasers.
- unknown
  





User avatar
7 Reviews



Gender: Male
Points: 890
Reviews: 7
Sun Dec 02, 2007 1:19 pm
ciago92 says...



ya know, I don't think there is...there's this minor detail of: He wrote this almost two years ago. I dunno if he has others and just didn't post them here, but nothing that I've seen. And trust me, I"ve looked...oh well.
  





User avatar
62 Reviews



Gender: Female
Points: 890
Reviews: 62
Mon Mar 03, 2008 3:35 am
Izzyeyore says...



I loved this!

my only issue is your use of "coarse" instead of "course"

but, kudos to a great perspective switch!
My policy on life: you're wasting it by being sad and making others sad, so hug someone today! :D
  








cron
This is a house of homes, a sacred place, by human passion made divinely sweet.
— Alfred Joyce Kilmer