Young Writers Society

You should have looked before
you burned that bridge,
because now you're falling
into nothing.

As the burning pieces fall
and turn into ash around you
find your wings
and fly.

I like it, but I'm a little confused about the feel. At the beginning, it feels as if the narrator the narrator is scolding for what you've done, but at the end, they give encouragement. On the other hand, I can see it as a sort of parent view. First, pointing out your wrongs before helping you along with your problems. Anyway, I like the feeling of hope it gives at the end. At first, I thought it'd be a poem giving shame to a person, but it's nice to see that hope. Besides that, I feel as if something's missing from it. I'm not sure what, but I feel almost empty from reading it. Of course, that's my view alone and someone else may think differently. Overall, I find it a decent read.

I liked this, a truly simplistic and beautiful poem. It actually meant something to me, which is rare, and I feel like it's a warning to people who don't take opportunities. My favourite line is easily; "and fly". The super-simple line just has so much resonance in my head. The author is offering a solution to the readers problem, and is offering it sincerely, even though the solution is impossible. Fantastic.

One thing;

You should have looked,
before you burned that bridge.

In my head that works better. But obviously that's my opinion.

~JCK

Hi!
I'm not sure what to say.The poem seems great, but a million thoughts came upon me. I'm not sure what you mean.In my opinion, the poem needs a bit of fixing and explaining.
I like it.It's pretty good and all,but once the reader reads it,he'll go back and say:"Did I miss something?"
Anyway,you seem like a good writer with deep feelings and thoughts. I'm looking forward to read more.

Does it really have to be this short? :/ When I read this, I instantly got interested until I noticed the length. If you actually had more for this, add it because I was so excited. I can't really generate much of what a message you're trying to get here so I would look it over and try to add some stuff but actually, do what you got to do. Good luck and keep writing.