Ignorant Haiku

Silence in the house
Computer humming loud
I crave Snickers.
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There you go. Bleed your eyes out. Bad Haiku by the Baroness (I....rhyme!)

Don't put yourself down so much... but I agree. Didn't contain much depth, just a basic description of what is happening around you, it doesn't induce any challenging or profound thoughts in the reader.

A haiku is:

5 syllables
7 syllables
5 syllables

Yours is 5 6 4 so it's not a real haiku.
You could change "loud" to "loudly" but I have no solution for the last line.

I said it was bad...lol.
REVISED: Ignorant Haiku:
Silence in the house
Computer humming loudly
I crave Snickers bar.

'Tis NOT bad at all, in my opinion! You have summed up the depths of my surroundings and feelings in three lines!

Goldie

Baroness Ink wrote:Silence in the house
Computer humming loud
I crave Snickers.
-----
There you go. Bleed your eyes out. Bad Haiku by the Baroness (I....rhyme!)

Attention deficit and curious. Adolescent and cute. I think this has to be appreciated from a teenage perspective because there's an apparent hormonal madness attached to it.