Young Writers Society

Yay!! Haha and thanks, I found it and just had to use it. Gotta love the Joker.

Okay, enough rambling! Onto the review!

Durriedog wrote:I scrabbled at the side of the opening while trying not to be bested by gravity, gulped down into the horrible darkness by the very thing that had ironically kept me on my feet all these years.

As much as I like the wording you have here, it got rather lengthy for me, and borders on a run-on sentence.

It was as if all the vicious knots and bends in the roots of this tree were centred on this man-made obstruction.

I love this! Reminds me of the Tree of the Dead from Sleepy Hollow.

When I was done, I ripped the corner off a blanket and pushed the top and bottom of an end through the stick, so it was like a flag.

And I had to write on the stick to distinguish it from the many others lying around.

Why would he need to write on the stick to distinguish it if he's made the flag?


Okay, that's all that I noticed! Well done yet again, loving the twist and looking forward to the next installment.

It was great. Other than what Spitfire said, of course, it's okay, I think. You could still do some good by putting those gaps in between the paragraphs, but then again, I'm just a bit too nit-picky for styling. I liked it though, so keep on writing as always!

Robyn.

I think you shoukd absolutly continue this! I loved the different days of the month, it made me want to read more. The people before me have told you what you need to fix so I wont repeat. I hope you will put more up, I enjoyed reading this a lot. This story has some good potential!
Wicked <3