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Irony's Sublimity: The Philine Quartet



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Tue Mar 04, 2008 5:23 am
J.C. Belding says...



I
When arrogance succumbs the deepest root then death be laid upon thee. Alas, as scores before have partaken, so does this empire crumble down upon itself. Babylon is now but one with dust; its mighty legions consumed by the flaming grasp of shame and thus an equivalent to ash. Though its people lay divided, pacts made through the heat of desperation, through the stifling presence of fear, forge upon them a firm of unity. All is but seven upon the Final Hour: The divided; taken with ease by the looming wolf. The thieves, slaughtered in disgust by all fingers of God, both sides of the coin all but crimson to their fate. The prophets; claimed by none but blasphemy or the stake. The brave; bold in heart yet weak of mind, in this all but doom shall reap the rewards. The faction; upon which idealism has taken hold for in unity there must be but one lie. The betrayals; neither lack of coin nor fragility of faith may suffice for whoring the enemy. The remnants; those who labor for but earth shall in turn be soon rested beneath it. And at last we come to the finale of this list of fools, damned by God. The Akkmien; firm, mighty, wise, yet still illogical. Though their purpose is utterly clear, it is ultimately unachievable, for a world without tyranny is a world without man.

II
The Akkmien suffered greatly for their secrecy. Upon many scores of morrows' eves have they witnessed the grotesque spectacle of brother and sister, put to the flame either through fear, delusion, or force of arms. They watched as the physical entities of such suffering passed by, favoring neither a touch to their flesh nor a tear to their dream. Time passed ineffective, for those who lie in shadow are at a threaten only by those who dare to enter the dark. Alas the twilight approached when the Akkmien were at last forced to abandon their collapsing cloak, if only for a sun's seventh set. To them this period is know only as the gap between the pillars, the wall between the generations. By the first day's end confusion's cloak breached the nearest city. By the second, it appeared as if the region's whole had blockaded their abodes from the steadfast view of nature's eye. Iron was drawn and words muttered; paranoia took to the air. As the eagle senses the hunter's edge so did the Akkmien taste of the hour's fruits and found them to be ripe to the peak. Thus they abandoned their cabinet within a single of earth's mighty citadels and descended upon the world's center, seeking refuge in the stretch of land that God himself has come to call his blessed doorstep, Jerusalem.

III
By the year upon which the Akkmien cast their presence over the sacred city, had four monarchies in whole laid their hand within its aged walls post to the great fall of Babylon. Its blackened history was that of a jewel, cast down into the quarters of a hundred foolish thieves. Let the Akkmien's arrival at least herald in a dwarfed degree of conscious. So as time has stated in its heavenly accords, known to the mortal man simply as fate, Jerusalem was relinquished from the control of its former denisens, into that of the Turks. This act was the kindling to the fire that would smoke away the Akkmien from their second abode and cause their final flight. Alas, the torch came from the emblazed spirits forever bonded with the First Crusade. Upon the date of their glorified conquest, a wave of carnage submerged every street and alleyway. The residence of a now former land were obliterated in what they presented to be the will of God for the soul context of religions is indeed created by the divine, yet the borders are decided upon only by those of a mortal blood, and through this source of design, has it never ceased to change in courtesy to war. This act of deprived wisdom left the Akkmien no choice but to free themselves of the intensity, to scatter from Jerusalem with the hope of finding a new place to regain their hold, all the while, carrying the ever-punishing phantom of the Final Hour, revived by the tragedy of the Crusade, for ignorance is indeed man's greatest immaturity, and, in nature of completing the circle, immaturity is, in turn, man's greatest ignorance.

IV
When cast into the desert's hold, any who possess blood of this earth will also come to claim its temptation. Alas, those among the Akkmien who grew to a state of seduction from which they could not be resurrected, formed together holding the searing intention to tread their own path to a new salvation, thus is the nature of man. But that which heralds in enough heat must be set to flight by the bearer, lest his hand be forever scarred or enflamed. And so, in this circumstance, did these visionaries of alternation, loosen their hold in cause of the release of their bondage of meaning, thrusting it among Heaven's bonfires so it may assume a position of guidance. And so, they were led astray from their master of a former affiliation and sent into the hands of the child heir of Nur-Aldin. Through the lavish auras of the damning substances that claim the likes of gold and silver, precious stimulators of rock and flesh, woven silks and foods of succulence, where these once nameless wanderers, now given the title future peasants and kings alike, from Istanbul to Great Britain would come to know and fear; Hashshashins; assassins. Despite the distractions of their lost brothers, the Akkmien persisted onward, at last reaching a suitable place to make residence; the city of Damas. Upon their arrival, words have been whispered within the city walls, words of misguided fear of heartless travelers that were soon to emerge from the desert to wreak havoc upon their homeland. Through the efforts to loosen the tongues of the Hashashins, the Saracens achieved a deluded history of an ancient organization, founded upon the fall of the Babylonian Empire; an account of such deception that even their name was of a deformed state. Through this tale the Akmien were forever branded as the radical cult of murderers and death-bringer, know to this day as the Akkmentain. Thus irony's sublimity was at last brought down upon the world.
Last edited by J.C. Belding on Fri Mar 28, 2008 8:59 am, edited 2 times in total.
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Tue Mar 04, 2008 6:55 am
Snoink says...



*Moved to Fantasy Fiction*
Ubi caritas est vera, Deus ibi est.

"The mark of your ignorance is the depth of your belief in injustice and tragedy. What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the Master calls the butterfly." ~ Richard Bach

Moth and Myth <- My comic! :D
  





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Thu Mar 27, 2008 4:31 am
NaramYesh says...



I really enjoy your elaborate style of writing (though perhaps it can be toned down a tiny bit by removing uneeded words). Good use of vocabulary, and interesting plot line.

One minor piece of advice/criticism:

was relinquished from the Muslim control into that of the Turks.


The Turks were Muslims by the time they held Jerusalem. This sentence, to me, makes it seem as if weren't. So perhaps instead you could insert "Arab" or, name of a dynasty, like the Fatimids in place of "Muslim".
  





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Thu Mar 27, 2008 7:16 am
J.C. Belding says...



Thanks for the advice. I can't believe I didn't catch that mistake earlier.
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Fri Mar 28, 2008 12:58 am
Jiggity says...



All in all, this is an excellently well written piece, aside from the odd awkward turn of phrase. And by this, I refer to unnecessary words halting the flow, rather then any stylistic necessity. The complete exposition, or narration wears on you a bit after a while. I was impressed, nonetheless, for the clarity of the writing.

It seems an odd choice though, both in idea and in form.

I think its a shame that you didn't put your obvious skill to use in a more standard short story, rather then an outdated form of prosaic exposition. Keep up the good work.

Cheers.
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Fri Mar 28, 2008 1:58 am
Kenpachi Masamune says...



Though that was the old style, description and elegance superseded practical flow. If you are going to appreciate the old style then you need to be well-versed in many subjects through which other like-minded readers can share a common experience or understanding from.

Something else to check into:

"Constantinople to Great Britain"

This was during the Gothic times, yes? I am not sure if Great Britain would be acceptable if you are dealing with the early rise of the cathedral. Since the style moved from outside of Rome towards France and the falling Roman Empire had already been moved. Now the Kingdom of Great Britain formed in 1707 under the union. Though going back in name alone would be to 1604. This seems too late to reference with Constantinople. Considering this is well after the 14th century.

Perhaps you could use Salamanca Cathedral of Spain for the reference?
  








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