I found it a little rambly, making me want to skim and a little telly rather than showy... but you just want grammar corrections, so that's what I'll give you.
Reyu wrote:My name is Jack smith.
Should be 'Smith'.
Reyu wrote:The dead only knows death.
Firstly, it should be 'The dead only know death.' And secondly, I think that since this is a reoccurring theme, you should make it flow better... maybe 'Only the dead know death.'
Reyu wrote:My only hopes is that whoever may still exist have not gone completely mad.
Should be 'hope' not 'hopes'.
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I think that's it for the grammar... you could work on it to flow better, though...
If you can't get out of your comfort zone, you'll never find what you're looking for. Don't make things quick and easy to feel better short term. Make a change and then you'll feel better longer term. — Frinderman
