Young Writers Society

Okay, so here's the deal. About a month ago I started writing a blog. It wasn't a normal blog, more like a fictional novel that I would add to everyday, filling the readers in on the days events.

It starts off with... oh never you mind. you can read it to find out.

Basically I'm looking for a review on all of those things that you promise yourself that you'll get around to, but never do. And It's always nice to have someone else's input on things, as you think that you're god and everything you write turns to gold... the usual stuff.

So:

Did you like it?
Would you read on? [you can do that here
Anything I should add more information to?
Anything I should take information out of [info-dumping]?
Anything that made you confused.
Do you think it's a good idea?

and all of the other stuff that you may/may not want to add.

Oh... thank you so much! Even if you just read it and post a short comment on what you thought... I don't mind. Thanks for reading!

I'll get around to this when I can. All I ask is for some patience, as that I'm quite a busy person nowadays...I'll get it back to you asap.

Okay, I don't mind how long you take... I just want other peoples opinions, and some basic grammar checks.

I've done part of it. I'm not sure if you're allowed to do your advanced crits in parts... but fi you aren't, then it really should be put in the rules.

The story has lots of mystery, but was somewhat boring in the first parts. Didn't really like that. Try adding in some more action. Like maybe have your character (I'm really not sure if it's a boy or a girl, clear up on that a bit) actually escape from police. That would be cool. Once they get onto the island it's cool, although you should explain the geography of the island more, if they're going to have to survive there? What's there besides the desert and trees? What's the temperature?

~ Merlin34

Yeah, I have read the hunger games. Just recently, actually. I might have the beginning changed around, to get rid of the running away part, and she's just beign sent to boarding school. Thanks for the critique!

No probs. I'll get the rest done soon. Maybe tomorrow or Wednesday at the latest.

EDIT: Got it done.

Well, I finished it. Can't say I overly enjoyed it- just not my type of story. All my comments are on here. I used Microsoft 2007 with the tracking changes- I really hope you can open it. If not, you can pm me and I'll try to get it into a more standard word processor.