Young Writers Society

Well quite simplisticly, my main character is about to storm into her fathers room whilst he's having sex. She finds out from the father's sexual companion that this affair is the reason her mother relinquished her life several years go. This is for my coursework and she has to end up on the top of a building about to commit suicide.

The problem is, I don't know how the scene is to occur. I don't know if I should detail emotions (if so how? She's obviously infuriated). Should she go in guns blazing, or should she be all "Hello, father." in quite a cool tone (would be nice if someone who knows what imeans can tell me the proper word for this ^^). Should she cut off her fathers balls (Possible joke intended)?

I rated this PG-13, for obvious reasons.


Really all that you are saying depends on who your character is, and what she is like. You can't just make her do something; what she does depends on her. Is she usually someone who avoids confrontation? Then she might just find out, and leave. Does she tend towards violent out bursts? then, yes, she might castrate him. It seems like an odd scene, as it is, so you would have to write it carefully. Walking in on someone while they're doing that has enough conflict and embarrassment, but to couple is with finding out why her mother killed herself is either ingenious, or too much. I'm not quite sure. Perhaps it also seems odd to me that she would wander into such a thing, and her father's partner would willingly explain the reasons behind her mother's suicide, right then and there. It would more than likely be a scene of blushing, "pardon me"s, and leaving as soon as they can... rather than followed by a conversation on her mother who had died. Do you understand that? or... am I making no sense?

Perfect sense.

Thje problem I'm having is when I've left the story I forget to re-read it. Also, I'm limitted to two pages and everything had to either happen at once, or like you said, she would find out and leave.

I want her to discover why her mother flung herself off the top of a tower, but maybe the sex scene is a bit much. The women was going to say something like, "Oh wasn't your last wife 4 years ago?" and then Sanar (the main) would start to realise from there. True, having a serious conversation with someone who is butt-naked seems moderately paradoxical.

Thank you very much my friend. I shall rewrite that whole section of the story. Thank you.

Yes, perhaps you should write it with a different setting. ^_^ the idea just seems a bit messy, you know? Best of luck with it!

Weird question. I'm rating it R.

But anyway, I think that it is highly unlikely that someone would just burst into the room and, upon finding their father in bed with another woman, castrate him or something. That just doesn't make sense. I mean, it's more of a male thing to do. So if your main character was the man's SON then I could possibly see that happening.

And that's basically because sons and daughters have different relationships with their mothers and fathers. Sons tend to get along better with their mothers and daughters tend to get along with their fathers. Mind you, you will find exceptions to this rule, as in everything, but there have been several psychological studies done on this, and that seems to be the main trend.

If I were the daughter and I found that out by that particular scene what was happening, I would probably run out in tears. Since it seems that your main character has to jump off a building (I think that's what was going on anyway) then it would be despair -- not anger -- that compels her to do this.

But the whole scene sounds a little contrived. Be very careful writing it!