Young Writers Society

We all have fresh ideas in our head that we try to get onto paper (or your computer ;]). So during my art class the most random idea was planted in my head for a story i want to write.

The plot is of a man who lives with his dying mother in her house. He is in his late to mid-30's, and works a blue collar job. As he checks on his mother one day, he sees a girl walking home from school (High School). He soon becomes obsessed with watching her everyday, walking to and from school. His obsession becomes dangerous when he begins to feel that he needs the young girl. If she does not walk by that day, he feels upset, incomplete. He eventually plans to kidnap the girl and have sex (or rape) her. (Of Course this would be much further into the story). As he is about to rape her, he sees her state of fear and lets her go after keeping her for several days. he is in a state of despair after releasing her and eventually decides to kill himself.

Now this is just the story in a nutshell, I was just wondering if anyone had any tips to help expand, or change the story. Of course it would be spread out, but I just got this idea on a whim and wondered overall what you guys think.

Thanks :]

Lolita.

Ditto Ditto. It's uncannily like Lolita

It's creepy.

I was about to say "give your character a want", but you already said that.

And they're right. Lolita. XD

I suggest that you read Lolita, then put your own unique spin on it. Obviously if people say "Lolita" at first thought, then it's not original. Make it original.

If you want to expand the story, get rid of this part:

As he is about to rape her, he sees her state of fear and lets her go after keeping her for several days. he is in a state of despair after releasing her and eventually decides to kill himself.

I haven't personally read Lolita, but I don't think that last part makes any sense. If he's that obsessed about her, if he's gone to planning in his head shouldn't he follow through with the plan?

Anyways. Yeah.

I can't critique story plots or anything. But just sit down, write, see where it takes you. A lot of stories spring without plot and are actually pretty good ideas.