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Dreams Tell Lies - Chapter Thirteen



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Sat Jun 18, 2011 9:53 am
IcyFlame says...



Spoiler! :
Here's chapter thirteen :) It's a little short but I'll expland on it when I edit - Reviews are very much appreciated :D
Also, if you want to follow the book there is an officail page here.
Thanks for reading!!



Chapter Thirteen
I beamed at him. Home. I had been so many place in the past few months that I thought I might have forgotten the meaning of the word. Yet stood here, in front of this dazzling house I knew it had returned to me.
The front door swung open and a blonde figure came racing out of the house to meet us. “You made it out alright then!” said Jack, slapping Tyler’s hand lightly as he reached the car.
“Piece of cake,” he replied, smirking. He turned to me and caught me in a bear hug. “Hey, Ash!”I pulled away from him, laughing.
“Where’s Eric?” Tyler asked.
“In the kitchen,” said Jack and Tyler raised his eyebrows.
“I swear he lives in that room!” he said. “He only leaves it to eat, sleep and use the loo.”
I smiled, “he sounds like a bundle of laughs!”
“You wait until you meet him!” said Jack pulling me in through the front door. The house was as magnificent on the inside as on the outside. A foyer greeted us as soon as we walked in, its high vaulted ceiling decorated with dark wooden beams.
A wide, carpeted staircase stood to the left of the room, and Tyler ascended it, gesturing for me to follow. On the landing stood another staircase, but we did not go up this one. Instead we wandered along what a maze of doors, Tyler pointed some of them out but I only registered a few. Finally, we came to a door at the end of the hall and he opened it with a click.
“This used to be our guest room,” he told me. “Not that we had many guests. Eric just can’t seem to live without having a purpose for each room. It’s yours now.”
I stared around. This was by far the biggest bedroom I had ever seen. The king sized bed was decorated with lavender sheets and cream pillow cases which looked as though they had been freshly washed and ironed. A table stood in the far corner of the room, accompanied by a wooden chair and desk light.
The window was also large, with cream curtains that matched the pillows hanging by the sides. I went to look out of it eagerly, seeing the fresh green grass that I had missed so much. I was free.
I beamed at the view, wishing it would never end.
“The bathroom is through the door to the left and you should have everything you need in there too,” said Tyler. I turned to him, still smiling.
“Thank you.”
“Are you two still up there?” Jack’s voice called from downstairs. “Come and bring Ash to meet Eric.”
Tyler sighed, “Good luck with Eric. It’s not easy to make a good impression with him. Believe me, I’ve been trying for about ten years and it still hasn’t seemed to work.”
He led me downstairs, through to a gleaming kitchen that was surrounded by elegant wooden counters and cupboards. A young man sat at the table, his hands in his dark hair. When he saw Tyler he stood up, taking his glass of water with him.
“This is Ashling,” Jack announced. “Ashling, this is Eric. Pay no attention to him,” he added in a hushed tone. “He’s not good with new people.”
“Hi,” I said to Eric.
He jerked his head at me, as if I were nothing more than an irksome fly, and then turned his attention back to Tyler. “What can she do?” he asked.
Tyler sighed heavily. “She dreams the future Eric.”
The effect that this simple sentence had was incredible. Eric dropped the glass he was holding; it fell to the floor and shattered into a million pieces. He ignored it and turned his shocked eyes to Tyler.
“We didn’t sign up for this!” he practically yelled. “Are you sure she’s the right one?”
I was astonished, and slightly hurt. I had thought that I would be treated differently here, rather than like the freak show that the lab had thought I was. Apparently this wasn’t the case.
“I know,” Tyler was saying, “but what if it isn’t true?”
“She’s not safe!”
“Innocent until proven guilty,” Jack put in quickly. “We don’t know that do we?”
“I don’t want to wait until she proves herself to be guilty,” Eric retorted. “If she isn’t safe I want her out.”
Tyler placed a hand on my shoulder as Jack began to argue profusely with Eric. “Let’s go outside.” We stepped over the broken glass and headed for the door that lead out onto the patio.
The garden was enormous! It appeared to stretch on for miles, over hills and past trees. A small pond was situated just a few footsteps away and was covered with water lilies. Fish swam freely in the crystal water and a soft breeze caressed the surface, sending ripples in every direction.
Tyler walked onwards, and I ran to keep up with him.
“Why was Eric so angry?” I asked him. “And why were all the children at the camp so cold?”
“They were scared of you.”
“I don’t understand it though. I told them my power, thinking that they would understand and maybe accept me now that they realised I was one of them.” I sighed. “But they just treated me like an outsider.”
“There is a legend surrounding a child with the power to dream the future,” Tyler told me seriously. “Children will have either been brought up to fear anyone who seems to posses the magic of a seer.”
“Why have I never heard it?”
“It is told by parents to their children and then to their children’s children but there are many who have never been involved in magic and sorcery and have no clue of these tales,” said Tyler. “Some learn it in the concentration camps and some learn of it like you are about to, from someone who has heard it many times before.
“Many years ago, before The Creator even began to assemble his forces, there lived a Wiccan named Isabella. She discovered the powers she had inside her and saw them as being capable of being manipulated through the practice of sorcery. She studied witchcraft carefully and then formed an organisation called the Pentagram; a group for those who claimed to be talented in the magical arts. The Pentagram was so named because of the four elements: air, earth, fir and water. The fifth was the spirit which was said to unite the others.
“It started off as most of these things do; four or five of them would meet perhaps once a week to shout incantations and draw special circles. Of course, nothing really amounted to anything. Then Isabella heard of The Creator and his theories regarding those with magic confirmed her own. She was excited, for you see she was no longer the young women she had once been – misguided attempts to master magic had drained her, and she was becoming old.
“She went to The Creator, telling him she shared his passionate vies and suggesting they form an alliance. Together, she said, they could change the world. But he refused her immediately and sent her away, laughing at her stupidity. From that day forward black magic entered her heart and she hated The Creator from the bottom of her deep, dark soul. She began to storm each nearby village, killing every magical child she could find so that none would enter the service of the man she despised so much.
“The Creator ignored it for a while, trying to divert his attention to other things. Soon however, he realised that he was losing plenty of powers that could be harnessed for his own gain. He sent men to find her, dispatching some of the most skilled trackers in the world to bring her to him. But none succeeded. He was furious and punished all that failed, demanding that they try again and again yet it was no use.
“It was a year before she finally made her way up to his laboratory (where he was doing his research at the time). She was growing weaker with each passing day and she had come to offer him one last chance. Pretending to be interested in her offer, he invited her in and asked her how she had evaded him for all this time.
“She told him that she had dreamt of his men and where they would search each coming day. When she awoke, she simply moved to somewhere she knew they would not search. Upon finding out this information The Creator flew into a rage! He ordered his guards to attack her immediately and throw her away in his dungeons where she would never see the light of day again.
“But the Isabella merely smiled icily; she had already dreamt the outcome of this day. As the men ran forward she bellowed out a curse upon all the lands; one day there would be another like her. Another who’s dreams would show the way and whose magic would be more than equal to that of The Creator’s. That child would be able to bring about the end of The Creator and if they should choose to do so, the end of the world itself.
“With that the old woman burst into flames and was gone. Black ash flew through the window and over the hills and fields. It glided over trees and lakes and rivers, far into the distance. The Creator ordered for it to be found before the curse was completed and the black soul of the witch flew into the body of a young child. But it never was.”
I gaped at him. “And you believe that?”
He shrugged. “It’s hard not to. I was brought up by my grandmother and she believed in all of these stories.”
I didn’t say anything. I didn’t think I had ever had so many questions in my life and it was very difficult to stop them from all coming out at once.
“What about your parents?” I blurted out before I could stop myself.
“They died about a year after I was born,” said Tyler simply. “I never knew them.”
I turned my head to the ground, regretting asking him already. “I’m sorry,” I mumbled, keeping my eyes on the floor.
“Thank you.”
We had been walking during his story and had now reached the end of the meadow and come to a little river that meandered along like a snake in the grass. A small wooden bridge stretched the length of the water, its colour contrasting perfectly with the trees that dotted the banks.
It was hard to dwell on the story now, the scene around me was so tranquil and the river seemed to wash away all my worries. I glanced up to see Tyler checking a phone in frustration and then hurriedly putting it back in his pocket as he noticed me.
“What are you doing?”
The look on his face was replaced instantly by a smile. “Nothing,” he answered swiftly and headed towards the river. Peeking through the curtain of water were several flat stones, each about the size of a football. Tyler hopped over the first two and then extended his hand to me. “Come on!”
I shook my head. “I think I prefer my chances with the bridge.”
He laughed, showing gleaming white teeth but still did not retreat his hand. “Come on,” he repeated. I reached out reluctantly, stepping onto the first stone as I did so and willing myself desperately not to fall. But fate was feeling cruel that day and so as soon as I took the first step I slipped on the shiny surface below me. My arms flailed wildly and I’m pretty sure I would have fallen into the water right then if it weren’t for the strong arms that gripped my waist and held on tight.
Tyler laughed again, and helped me safely to the other side. “Are you usually this good on your feet?” he asked me.
I raised my eyebrows at him and chose to ignore the question. I strode off haughtily, turning my back on him. Soon though, I realised that I wasn’t getting anywhere. The river and Tyler weren’t getting any further away and the hills in the distance didn’t seem to be getting closer. I wheeled around.
“What’s going on?”
“It’s a force field,” he told me. “Eric set them up all around the property. It’s to stop any um… unwanted visitor coming in.”
Unwanted visitors. That meant The Creator and I knew it. Was I putting them all in danger by being here as Eric had said? Was it right for me to stay?
“Let’s go back in,” said Tyler, interrupting my thoughts abruptly. “You must be hungry by now?”
My stomach growled loudly at this question and I nodded, grinning. “Can we use the bridge this time?”
He smiled, “bridge it is.”
Last edited by IcyFlame on Tue Sep 27, 2011 7:35 pm, edited 2 times in total.
  





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Sat Jun 18, 2011 2:37 pm
TwistedMuffins says...



Oh My God :'D So cute!

Right, back to work!
This was amazing, just as any of your other works. You see, the thing is Icy, that when you start a conversation, "You start it with a captial letter."

An example:
"I love chocolate." said Justtrying.
Justtrying said, with a smile on her face, "I love chocolate!"

- Yeah?
Now :
"I love chocolate," Justtrying said, "very very much!"
-Now over here "very" is in lower case because the sentence continues. Get it? :P

So, many a times, you've used lower case in the wrong times. But other than that, I found something else:

“Where’s Eric?” Tyler asked.
“In the kitchen,” said Jack and Tyler raised his eyebrows.
“I swear he lives in that room!” he said. “He only leaves it to eat, sleep and use the loo.”


He's in the kitchen, yeah? So why does Eric have to leave to eat? Eat in the kitchen only!


Other than that - Perfect!
Good Job!
If I were to have a super power, it would be to time-travel, so that I could turn back time, and erase your very existence.
  





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Sat Jun 18, 2011 5:37 pm
snickerdooly says...



Hi, I loved this chapter it was a big key in the story because you finally found out the extent of Ashling's powers. Other than some spelling errors and the edits that JustTrying made I thought this chapter was perfect! Also I like the new cover of the novel and I hope you continue writing! Good luck, keep up the great work!
Peace,
Snickerdooly
"Characters cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved." Helen Keller
  





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Sun Jun 19, 2011 7:51 am
Cluedo says...



Hey there!
I haven't really got a lot to say in this review but I like the way the story is developing... also I think I'm getting a thing for Tyler *swoon* hehe!
I hope we get to find out more about his past and why his parents died but I guess that isn't key to the story yet?
This Eric character seems a little grumpy but I can't wait to see more of him!
Looking forward to your next post :)
Cluedo ~
  





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Mon Jun 20, 2011 12:07 pm
borntobeawriter says...



Hey there Icy! Tis me!

Ok, well, there's a thing or two I want to mention here! First off, the meadow. The last time she was in one was with Harry, yes? Maybe she could remind herself of that. Everything's happening so fast, but not so long ago, he was her reason for being alive and safe. It seems to me she owes to him to give him a thought. Is he looking for her? Worrying about her? Does she care that he might be worried?

Also, nowhere has ever really been home for Ash. Why would she suddenly be all giddy about this? I'd figure that she'd be wary, hesitant, but not all excited. Why doesn't she question where the house is from? And who owns it? And why that person does (If it's Eric) at such a young age?

Also, with so much deceit happening, why doesn't she question how fast Tyler hides his phone back in his pants?

My point is, although I liked the flow and description of this chapter, I think her lack of . . . wariness slightly frustrating. She's been through so much, has run (all?) of her life, been kidnapped, been 'rescued' by perfect strangers, who knows who they actually are and what they want from her? They'd never met her before, but had already decided to bring her with them on their escape. I would find everything highly suspicious and it bothers me that she doesn't.

Other than that, like I said, I liked the flow and detailing in this chapter. Keep up the great work!

Tanya
  





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Sun Jun 26, 2011 3:18 am
Ranger Hawk says...



Hey Icy! Sorry it's taken me a little while to get to this review.

I definitely agree with Tanya that Ash's reaction seems a bit off again; nothing that seems perfect turns out to be (especially in fantasy novels), and she seems a bit too ready to accept that everything is good and that the people here are trustworthy. To me, it sounds like Jack and Tyler have plans for her, like they're going to use her to help them bring down the Creator or something, and I'd be a lot more careful around them, no matter how cute they may be. (;

And that's another thought--she seems to feel pretty comfortable around guys and isn't too...how shall I say...reserved around them (hugging them, being sassy, etc.). She seems a bit like a flirt, even if it's unintentional, and I'm wondering where it's all coming from; as far as I know the only other guy she really got to know was Harry. Plus she's been through so many dangers and the like that it just seems a little airy the way she can be so cheerful and normal around the guys.

The story about the witch was great, I loved it, and even though it was something of an infodump, it was told well enough that it doesn't come across as being a big deal of one. It sounded a bit advanced for a teen to be telling, but I guess if he's heard it enough from other people then that method of storytelling could be ingrained in his mind?

The last thing I'd like to say is about Ash -- I'd like to get into her head a little more. See her thoughts, know how she's feeling, not just viewing the events and then hearing how she felt during the time after it's already happened. I still feel like there's a kind of barrier between Ash and the reader, and I'd like to feel closer with her, since she's the main character and the one we readers should be connecting the most with. Make her personality a little deeper, give us more of a window, and I think that'll really help us feel more concerned for Ash. Right now, I just think of her as a character that stuff is happening to, not a person that's in danger that I'm worried about.

All right, that's it. Let me know when you post up the novel so I can read it all! I can't wait to see how you end the book. :D
There are two kinds of folks who sit around thinking about how to kill people:
psychopaths and mystery writers.

I'm the kind that pays better.
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