The Successful Revolution

Their comes a time in people’s lives,
when suppression can no longer be tolerated.
Rebellion stirs in people’s heart
It is then that oppression starts to fall

But one man’s mutiny will not suffice.
His sacrifice shall create no martyr.
His dripping blood shall be a waste.
And in vain shall he die.

No, never in this manner
can evil be overthrown.
No, never in this manner
will the suppression end.

Courage and inspiration will not suffice.
Boiling blood will be incomplete.
It is here that the mind sets in,
and schemes an end to evil.

It teaches mutiny patience
It gives the rebels practise
It smartens the already brave ones,
And so…..begins the uprising.

Day and night pass in toil.
Adding brain to determination.
The rebels finally are prepared;
The heart takes charge back again.

But oppression does not give up.
It fights back with the same spirit.
However, when equal powers collide,
its the best cause that wins the fight

The mutiny finally succeeds.
Oppression slips and declines.
Yet dead corpses lay on the ground
Revolution comes at a price.

I especially like your last verse and even more the last sentence. Very provocative. And i just wanted to ask, are you so sure that the best cause always wins? A revolution had been taken place against racism and unfortunately, while it might not be as obvious, it still lurks in shadows and snakes it's way through nooks and crannies. (whoa i think i could have a poem going there lol) but anyway the good does not always win.

with your dark and gritty poem i think it'd fit. The good does not always win and they don't. For if they did why would evil still exist?

Sorry I had to throw a few things out, they were kind of like talk-to-text for me. First things that came to my head.

I think you should be more detailed on the colliding of equal powers. Explain in more detail, what happens? Like say, two powers collide, sparks fly, bystanders stare in awe, others motivated by such forces join either side, and so on. That could have been the climax of the poem, tensions rising and then a boom then things start to dwindle down. Like many revolutions and wars happen.

good poem though!

Good does not always win................I quite forgot about that.I'll see what is possible.But maybe, good looses because people with all heart and no brain fight for it.

Really appreciate the review.