II.
Ones are bad. Any number under ten is bad, except for fives and sevens. Fives are always good. Seven is lucky. Sevens shouldn’t be the last digit of a number though, unless it makes a pattern.
Odd numbers are horrible, except for fives. If they make a pattern like eleven or three hundred-forty-three, it’s also fine.
Fours and sixes aren’t great either. They’re too close to five and five is better.
Nines and ones are the worst. They are too close to a nice, round, even zero. The only acceptation is if they make a pattern.
Patterns are good.
_______________________
My parents just don’t get it. They don’t understand how gross this world is and why everything is just better in some kind of order.
They scowl when I wash my hands before and after I touch something. They get angry when I take thirty minute showers to decontaminate myself, and they get even angrier when I insist on doing it at least three times a day.
They don’t get it.
When I get mad at them for touching my things and messing up their order, they ground me for being rude. When I fix everything they put down, they get angry; and when I try to explain to them why their order is wrong and they should just listen to me, they make me go to my room.
They just don’t get it.
They finally ‘had it’ and demanded that I talk to someone about my ‘issues’. I don’t have any issues. They’re the ones that don’t understand. I’m perfectly fine.
________________________
My therapist asks to see my hands.
“Why? What’s wrong with my hands?” I ask.
“Nothing is wrong; I would just like to see them.” She smiled kindly at me.
I obediently put my hands in front of her. They could not touch her desk or any of her things. Those things are contaminated.
She gently took one of my hands in hers and ran her fingers carefully over my knuckles and joints. I didn’t understand what she was trying to do here. It was just spreading germs.
“Your hands are very dry, Jakeb. Why do you think that is?”
Was this some kind of trick question?
“I don’t know.”
“How many times a day would you say you wash your hands?”
Her questions were so confusing to me. She was making it seem like washing your hands was a bad thing or something.
“I don’t know.”
“Would you say a lot, like more than twice an hour?”
“Yeah.”
“How many times an hour do you typically wash your hands? Maybe that’s a better way to put it.”
“I don’t know, maybe three or four.” I still did not see what was wrong with this.
“What do your parents think about this?”
“They don’t like it because they don’t get it.”
“What don’t they get?”
“How many germs we are contaminated with every second of every day.”
“Do you see anything wrong with how much you wash your hands?”
“No. I’m getting rid of the germs.”
She paused for a couple of minutes to right things down in her notebooks. I counted her ceiling tiles. There were sixty-five. What a great number. However, one of the tiles had a stain on it which not only repulsed me but also made me upset. That one soiled tile ruined the other perfect sixty-four.
The therapist once again interrupted my thoughts.
“Before you go today Jakeb I just want to show you what your doing to yourself.” She motioned for me to come closer.
I didn’t understand. What I was doing to myself? I’m helping myself. I’m saving myself from being eaten away by germs.
She took my hand again. “You are ruining your skin, Jakeb.” Her fingers went over the super dry patches I hadn’t even noticed before. “By washing your hands, and your skin this much you are stripping away the essential oils of your skin, which means your skin is going to dry out like this.” She put my hand down. “I’m not asking you to stop washing your hands so often, because I know you won’t do that. Take this lotion, and for every time you wash your hands I want you to squirt some lotion on right after. It won’t give you germs, I promise.” She smiled and handed me a small blue bottle.
I grabbed it with the hand that was already contaminated, the one she had touched.
I wasn’t sure if I would follow her advice or not. I couldn’t decide if it was worth the risk.
Gender:
Points: 32055
Reviews: 1162