What are you supposed to do when you arrive back to the room you share with three other girls, and arrive inside only to find your best friend lying on the floor unconscious? And when you run over to her to check she’s allright, you realise that she’s not breathing and there’s an empty bottle of pills lying next to her? Your own pills, which you left in the bathroom cupboard for the first time since you got them three weeks ago.
I’m about to yell for help, before remembering that everyone else is at dinner and I’m not even supposed to be up here. No one would hear me if I shouted.
I run over to her, pressing down on her chest, giving her desperate mouth-to-mouth, before realising it’s not helping her at all and for all I know I could be crushing her ribs. So I shakily climb to my feet and walk as calmly as I can over to the secret drawer under her bed, where I know for a fact she keeps her mobile phone. It’s the same place she keeps everything else we aren’t allowed in our rooms.
My fingers can barely dial the numbers I’m shaking so much, but somehow I manage to type 999 into the tiny Nokia 3220 phone.
“This is Essex County Emergency Services, how can we help you?” the cheerful voice bursts from the phone, alive with energy. My mouth has dried up. Why can’t I say anything?
“Hello?” The voice asks unsurely. I have to say something. She’s just lying there.
“M-my friend. She’s not breathing.”
“Has she taken anything? Drugs etc?”
I nod my head, before remembering she can’t see me. “Yes.”
“I see. And where are you sweetie?”
My brain rushes into panic. For the life of me – or her for that matter – I can’t remember the name of my school.
“I-I.”
“Just breathe honey. Where are you?”
I glance down at my bed. My school jacket’s still lying on it from earlier today. I pick it up and examine the crest sewn onto my pocket. Svansete Boarding School.
“Svansete Boarding School. In Essex.”
“An ambulance is on its way,” the woman assures me. I look down at her unmoving body. It’s not reassuring at all.
“Thank you.” I remember to say, and then I press the red button and the line goes dead. What am I supposed to do until the ambulance gets here? She didn’t tell me what to do. What the hell do I do?
I place my jacket over her shoulders. All the silver blonde hairs are standing up on her arms and I don’t want her to be cold. She doesn’t look any less pale though. Her eyes are shut and she’s just sprawled out on the burgundy carpet. I just want to lie down beside her, and tell her she’ll be allright. But I’m not so sure she can hear me anymore.
“Casey? Casey, can you hear me? The ambulance is on its way. They’ll make you wake up I promise.”
She doesn’t answer. I didn’t think she would anyway.
The ambulance! I can hear it racing down the street. The screech of the tyres on the old school car park. I start to run. Down the stairs, through the various hallways. I know I’m close, I can hear them talking to Mrs Jackson. She’s denying an unconscious child in her school. How can she be so stupid?
I skid up in front of them, gasping for breath as they all stare at me.
“Please, she’s this way. She took my tablets.”
I start to run again, but how I have enough energy left to even move I have no idea. They’re all following me. Even Mrs Jackson. I still don’t think she believes me, but that doesn’t matter. I have to get them to Casey.
We arrive in the room and they crouch down besides Casey’s unmoving figure. There’s an oxygen mask covering her mouth, and they’re doing exactly what I did. They’re breathing into her mouth, pushing up and down on her fragile chest but it’s not working.
I back away towards the door. I don’t want to see this. But I hit the wall and don’t have the energy left inside me to stop myself falling to the ground. Mrs Jackson’s behind me, hyperventilating into a paper bag the ambulance people gave her. Why can’t I look away though? I don’t want to see this.
“I’m not getting anything. She must’ve been dead for hours,” I hear the ambulance man say quietly to his partner who nods her head.
“Do we call it quits?”
They nod again in unison and walk over to me. The woman bends down till she’s at my level. I know she’s speaking to me, and I know what she’s saying but I can’t hear her. I can’t let myself. If she says it and I hear her, then it means it’s true. And it can’t be true.
“Do you understand what I’m saying?” she asks me. I stare straight past her at Casey’s body. They’re not moving her though. I guess they won’t be the ones to do that. Her eyes are still open though. I didn’t notice that before. They’re staring up at the patterned ceiling, like she’s just daydreaming. Maybe she is just daydreaming. She does that a lot.
“Maybe she’s just daydreaming,” I whisper to the ambulance woman. She shakes her head sadly and tries to get me to stand up.
“She’s not daydreaming. I know it’s hard, but you need to accept it. Your friend is-”
“No,” I inform her quietly. My voice has gone all stern and proper. I don’t even sound like me anymore, “She’s not. She can’t be. If you don’t say it, then she can’t be gone can she? She has to wake up. She has to.”
The ambulance woman stands up. “What’s your name?”
“Alyssa.”
‘Well Alyssa, I’m terribly sorry for your loss but I’m afraid it doesn’t work like that. I wish it did, but it doesn’t.”
I don’t listen. She’s not gone. I refuse to believe it.
The ambulance woman, Thompson, now speaking to Mrs Jackson says in a very regretful tone, “The police and the coroner will be over for her body as soon as possible. We’ll stay here until they arrive, but for now I suggest you get her out of here.”
She glances at me and Mrs Jackson nods. She’s stopped hyperventilating now. Mrs Jackson’s staring at me, but I’m not staring at her.
“Alyssa, come on let’s get you out of here.”
I shake my head. She looks like she understands, but she doesn’t understand anything. She doesn’t even leave.
I crawl over to the pale body laying only a few metres from me. Look at her. She’s so quiet and peaceful. She can’t be gone. Just look at her.
“Casey, wake up now. Stop playing games, I mean it. It’s not funny Casey.” I beg with her, but she won’t get up. I start to shake her body from side to side, but it goes limp in my arms and I can’t support her weight. She falls to the floor, her face becoming covered in her beautiful hair. Still she doesn’t flick it out the way. Any second now. Any second now she’ll wake up and start laughing. So I wait. But she’s still not moving.
“Alyssa, come away from her.”
“Casey wake up!” I scream suddenly. My eyes are flooding with tears, and there’s this thin wail like a dying animal would make, that seems to be coming from my mouth. Thompson and her partner move towards us and try to pull me away from her. I wriggle from their touch, and move even closer towards Casey.
“Casey you can’t do this to me,” I collapse beside her, a sobbing mess on the floor. “This isn’t meant to happen. You can’t leave me. I need you.”
But Casey’s not even listening to me. I can feel them trying to pull me away but I don’t care. I have to get her to wake up.
I start to pound her. As hard as my weak little fists can possibly manage. I’m smashing down onto her chest and Thompson is attempting to get me to stop. I know I should, but I can’t. I hear something crack inside of her but I carry on. Better to be alive with broken ribs, than dead with perfect ones. So I pound, and I pound until I can’t even see her anymore for tears blocking my eyes. Then the ambulance man lifts me up over his shoulder and I close my eyes, waiting for the tears to stop.
2 years earlier
“Hi, I’m Alyssa,” I smile down at the large brunette woman, who seems far too big for her tiny desk. She doesn’t smile back.
“Alyssa, I am Mrs Jackson. I’ll be your head teacher during your time here at St Matthews. I expect to be called Mrs Jackson at all times. Your room number will be 709, and you will share with three other girls. Breakfast is at 6.30am, and dinner is at 7.00pm. Lights out is at 9.30pm. I assume you have brought your uniform and everything you will require. Do you have any questions?”
I don’t know if I do. She says everything so quickly and matter-of-factly, it’s hard to take it all in. She probably expects me to be used to this sort of thing. But I don’t know what to do, or how to act. Am I even supposed to answer her? Was it even a real question?
“Miss Thomson?”
I think I should say something. She looks slightly annoyed. Her crimson painted nails tapping up and down impatiently on her desk, her far too well plucked eyebrows raised in exasperation.
“No Mrs Jackson.”
She seems satisfied. I think I gave her the answer she was looking for. She stands up, and I copy. Her massive frame towers above my tiny one, and I can’t help but feel rather intimidated.
“Right then, here is your timetable,” She says, handing me a small piece of white paper. I glance at it, but it doesn’t seem to make much sense to me. I’ll read it properly later. I look back up at her. She’s standing in the doorway, looking at me expectantly. “Well, come on then, I haven’t got all day. I’ll take you to your room, and then I shall see you again at dinner to see how you’re getting on.”
I nod, and follow her out the door. Her red spotty high heels click irritatingly as she walks, and she isn’t saying anything. I suppose I should take the opportunity to look around. The walls are completely plain white, not a speck of dust on them, and the few pictures on the walls are all posh famous ones that I know I should know the names to but I don’t. Each door is exactly the same as the last, wooden, with a glass window in that I can straight through. Through the windows of every door is a another bored class, half of them sleepily staring forward, the other half throwing chewed up wads of paper and other disgusting things at each other.
We turn left and reach a flight of stairs. It’s exactly the same colour as all the doors. I count the steps as I climb. There’s nothing else to do.
We reach the top of the stairs, and now we’re in a hallway filled with doors. There are fifty-six steps on the stairs. That’s quite a lot. I only have thirteen at home. And everything here is so identical, it’s just creepy. I can’t believe my parents though I’d find this fun.
“Right then Alyssa, I’ll leave you here. That’s your room just there, the other girls should be coming back from lessons any second now,” she turns and walks away without saying another word. I’m left all alone, holding tightly to my little tartan bag that my mum bought for me last Christmas.
I open the door to my room and step inside. It’s completely empty apart from four single beds and two chests of drawers. Everything’s so neat and tidy it’s hard to believe anyone lives in here. I walk over to one of the beds and place my bag and myself down onto it. Just as I do, three girls walk in. Two of them are tall with long hair, one of them is short with short hair. I smile in an attempt to be friendly.
“Hi,” I grin insanely at them. They all look at me, eyebrows raised, then look back at each other. “My name’s Alyssa.”
None of them say anything. The tall blonde one glances at her two friends, and they all share an understanding look. They walk over, the blonde one in front, the two brunettes following closely behind.
“Hi Alyssa, my name’s Casey. And this is Lilia and Keela. I hope we can all be best friends.”
She puts an odd sort of emphasis on the words ‘best friends’ and for a second I wonder if she’s making fun of me. But why would she be? She doesn’t know me. And anyway – I’m in no position to be turning up friends.
“So Alyssa, why are you here?” Casey asks me.
“Excuse me?”
“What did you do? To be sent to a boarding school? You must have done something absolutely terrible to be sent so young.”
I shake my head vigorously. “No, I haven’t done anything. My mum thought I would find it fun.”
They all look at each other. I don’t think they believe me. It doesn’t make much sense – what’s not to believe? My mum saw an advert for the boarding school in the local papers and thought I would find it fun. I’m always reading about boarding schools. Midnight feasts and everything. It’s going to be great.
Casey laughs, and Lilia and Keela laugh with her. I’m confused. I don’t understand the joke. She takes a seat on the bed next to me.
“Alyssa, people are never sent to boarding school for ‘fun’. That’s just not the way it works. People are sent to boarding school when they’re parents don’t want them anymore. My parent’s always hated me, and so I was sent here as soon as I was old enough. I only see them on holidays.” She tells me, smiling sympathetically. I don’t believe her.
“I don’t believe you.”
“I did something so bad, my parents haven’t talked to me since,” Lilia sits down on the other side of me and I stare at her curiously. I wonder what she did. I’ve never met a criminal before. She doesn’t say anything though. Her eyes look so sad, and both Casey and Keela are staring at the floorboards.
“What did you do?” I have to know.
“Trust me, you don’t want to know. You’re too young. The only reason I’m not in jail right now is because-” She cuts herself off mid sentence, and I can see her eyes welling up with tears. She’s furiously blinking them away, but it’s clear she wants to cry. I place my hand on her shoulder comfortingly.
She pushes me away viciously, and glares at me through her damp eyes. “What the hell makes you think I need your pity Alyssa? You only got sent here ‘cause your parents couldn’t stand to be around your ugly little face anymore.”
“That’s not true. You don’t even know me.” I tell her. She laughs at me, cold and harsh.
“So what? Why do you think you’re here then? To have fun? Well let me tell you now, any parent who even half likes their child would never even dream of sending them to boarding school! No one’s ever coming back for you!” She’s practically shouting at me now. She turns to the door, and walks out. Casey and Keela follow her, until I’m the only person left.
She can’t be telling the truth. My parents wouldn’t abandon me here. They’re coming back. They have too. I’m only thirteen years old. They wouldn’t leave me. They couldn’t. They love me. Don’t they?
I pull my mobile phone out of my backpack and switch it on. I know I was told it was only for emergencies, and I’m not even supposed to have it at school but I have to talk to them. I have to.
I dial the number into the phone, slowly and carefully so as not to get anything wrong. I glance from side to side to check there’s no one else around, then press call. It’s ringing.
“Hello?”
“Mum? Mum, it’s Alyssa.” I’m so happy to hear her voice.
“Alyssa? What are you doing calling me? What’s happened?” she asks, her voice going all high pitched and worried. I almost laugh.
“No mum, everything’s fine. I just wanted to talk. Just to chat or something. So what’s up?”
She heaves a huge sigh. “Alyssa, I told you – that phone is only for emergencies. Now hang up the phone.”
“But mum, I just want to talk. How are you? How’s dad?”
“Alyssa, I don’t have time for this. This phone is only for emergencies. Goodbye.”
The line goes dead, and I’m left with a ringing in my ears. I place the mobile down on my bed. I don’t know what just happened. Did my mum just hang up on me? What if Lilia was right? What my parents don’t like me anymore? Where will I go for holidays? What about my birthday? And Christmas?
I remember one time, it was on my eleventh birthday and my mum said she’d take me shopping with her as a special treat. She said she’d take me shopping in London, and we’d go to Hamleys and Harrods and all the main shopping places. So I woke up at about 8.00am, really excited and went to find my mum. But she wasn’t in her room. I couldn’t find her anywhere in the house. I didn’t want to wake dad because he works nights and sleeps in the day. So I started to get really nervous and sat by the phones for hours waiting for her to call. Then finally, at about 10.30am mum called.
“Alyssa honey, I’m not going to be able to make it back for our shopping trip. I’m in Norwich with Janie. You know Janie, my boss? Well, I’m up for promotion so I just couldn’t say no. But daddy can always take you. I’m sure he won’t mind.”
I never woke my dad that day. I just sat at home all day, watching TV and playing games on my own. I even looked through my mums’ handbag, to see if I could find her mobile to play games on. It didn’t have any good games though, so I read her texts instead. Most of them were boring, just about work and stuff. But then I came across one that wasn’t like the others. From a guy called Tom. It just said meet me at you know where after work. I have something for you. And so even though I knew it was wrong and I knew exactly what I was doing, I hacked onto my mums email account and starting reading all her emails from Tom. After that day I started doing it every day. When my mum was out at work, when she went out to the shops, whenever I could. And every day I would try my very hardest to make sure dad had absolutely no clue what I was doing and why.
I still wonder if she was actually with Janie that day or not. I guess I’ll never know. Maybe it’s better I don’t.
I stand up. I’m hungry and it has to be time for dinner now. Checking my reflection quickly in the rusty gold plated mirror, I then walk out the room and run downstairs. I’m not sure exactly where I’m going. I suppose I’m just following my sense of smell. I know I can smell something. I’m just not sure if it’s food or not. I burst through door after door, but everything looks so similar I could just be going round in circles. I keep on running and crash headfirst into a young girl carrying a pile of books. She drops them all to the floor.
“I’m so sorry, let me help you with them,” I ramble, not wanting to make an impression as the girl who knocks over little kids. She looks straight past me, panic filling her eyes. I turn around.
Casey, Lilia and Keela all stand behind me. I should apologise I suppose. They might still be mad at me.
“Hi guys. Look, I just wanted to say – I’m sorry about earlier. I didn’t mean to upset anyone. Am I forgiven?” I say, looking at them hopefully. They all grin at me, and I let out a huge sigh of relief.
“So are you coming to dinner then?” Keela asks. It’s the first thing I’ve heard her say so far.
“Yep, I’ll just be a second. I’m just going to help this girl pick up her books.” I tell them. Their eyebrows rise in unison.
“You’re helping Emma?” Casey says doubtfully. “Why?”
“Well I accidentally knocked all her books onto the floor. I was running down the hall.” I try to explain, but they just glare at Emma.
“You know Emma, you wouldn’t be knocked over so much if you weren’t so clumsy and watched where you were going.” Casey smirks at her. I try to protest, but Lilia cuts in.
“Or maybe if you just grew a bit so you weren’t such a midget.”
“Or if you weren’t such a little geek and actually had some friends.” Keela finishes for them, and knocks all the books we’ve just carefully picked up onto the floor again. Poor Emma looks like she’s about to cry.
“Now run along midget.” Keela giggles spitefully, and Emma runs off down the corridor, her thin plaits bobbing up and down behind her. I’m not sure what just happened. Did I…did I just help bully someone? I look at my new friends, and they smile at me. It seems so friendly and sincere, like nothing just happened. I’m confused.
“Come on Alyssa, it’s dinner time.”
Casey
I don’t know what to do. It’s 1.00am here, and everyone else is asleep or out. The new girl Alyssa was the first to drop. Then Keela decided to go see if she could buy some alcohol for a midnight party. She said she’d only be gone ten minutes. That was two hours ago. Lilia tried to stay up talking to me for a while, but eventually she couldn’t take it anymore, and fell asleep on the end of my bed.
My mum wrote to me today. I got the letter just before we were sent to bed, but I haven’t opened it yet. I’m scared of what it might say. My mum never writes.
I suppose I should open the top. It will just take a second, like a plaster. Rip it off in one quick pain free motion. But that’s a lie isn’t it? Plasters always hurt like hell. They stick to all the little tiny hairs on your arms, and you’re left with a big red mark where it was.
All of a sudden I tear it open, clawing frantically at it, suddenly desperate to know what’s inside. A small piece of white paper, covered in my mums’ tiny neat handwriting falls out onto my lap and I stare down it. I can’t read the whole thing, my eyes have gone all blurry and unfocused, but I can see the gist of it. The only words I need to see to know that this is bad news.
He’s been let out.
I can feel my cheeks getting wet. I’m crying. I haven’t cried in years. Not since I was nine, and fell over and broke my arm. It’s a good thing everyone is asleep really. Or else I’d never hear the end of it.
I lay my face down onto my bed and begin to sob. I don’t have the energy to hold it in. And Lilia’s a heavy sleeper anyway.
A hand is placed on my shoulder. I look up, only to see Alyssa’s worried face looking down at me. I didn’t even hear her get out of bed. I must have been louder than I thought. She sits down on the bed besides me and picks up the letter. I don’t even bother to take it back off her.
She skims through it hurriedly, then looks up at me, her already large amber eyes even larger and brighter than normal.
“What’s he in jail for?” she whispers, but I just look at her. What makes her think I want to tell her?
She nods like she understands me. “How long?”
“Eight years.”
“You can cry some more if you want. I don’t mind.” She tells me softly, and I shake my head.
“No, I’m done. You can go back to bed now. I won’t disturb you again.”
She lets out a shy giggle, and scurries back into bed. She’s asleep within seconds. It’s weird like that. She’s exactly the same age as us, but seems so much younger. I don’t suppose she’s ever had any real problems in her life. I almost feel bad about being so mean to her earlier. Not quite, but almost. She seems quite sweet.
I guess I’m going to have to write back to my mum. Just to let her know it’s going to be allright. It won’t, but she’ll be relying on me to tell her it will. See, the police never learn do they? They put you in jail for twelve years, then let you out after eight for ‘good behaviour.’ They think only reformed people will act good and nice in jail. Not people like my dad though. He’s clever. He knows what he’s doing. He’ll have been sucking up to them every day for eight years just to get out. And then he’ll come after me. Or mum.
He’ll get so mad when he finds out that she sent me to boarding school. It’s not her fault really. She couldn’t cope. After he was sent away, I went crazy. I was such a horrible child. She didn’t know what to do with me. She could never kick me, or punch me, or whip me with a belt like my dad could. I was so well behaved with him. He had both of us wrapped around his little finger. He would beat me if I was bad, and I was so scared I didn’t dare misbehave. The worst time was the day I got my spelling test results. I hadn’t studied at all, and I wanted to please him so much, so I copied of Jamie Sampson who sat besides me in class. He let me willingly because he had such a crush on me. But the very same morning he told me he fancied me and I laughed at him. We were only five. So in the middle of the test he put his hand up and told the teacher I was copying him. I got beaten so badly that night. I couldn’t open my left eye for two weeks. I was bruised all over and could barely walk. The teacher’s obviously realised what had happened, but were too scared to do anything about it. And the moment my dad went to jail, I went straight up to Jamie Sampson and I kicked his face in. He had to have nine stitches. I was a tough kid.
What am I going to do if he comes to get me though? He’s my dad, he’s legally allowed to. He’s still got full childcare, because he wasn’t even sent away for beating me up. He went to jail for drug dealing and crashing his car whilst being drunk. He killed three people. And if he gets me back, he’ll kill me too.
Alyssa
It was so strange last night. It’s like it never really happened – like it was a dream or something. Maybe it was. She just walked straight past me this morning, didn’t say a word. No kind ‘thank you for being there for me’ or even a threat like ‘don’t tell anyone or I’ll beat you up.’ She just didn’t say anything.
I’m quite liking it here so far. Everything is weird and so unlike everything I’m used to, but maybe that’s good. School back home was so boring. It’s exactly the same lesson-wise, but I’ve never had friends like Casey, Lilia and Keela. They’re so different – so much more interesting than my old friends. Right now Keela and Casey are bunking off in town, and last night Keela didn’t even get in till about 5am. I think she was drunk. She kept swaying about from side to side, and her make-up was smudged all over her face. She was shouting and slurring at us. We tried to make her be quiet, but it didn’t matter ‘cause eventually she just fell asleep. Right on the floor. She just dropped down and started snoring really heavily.
“You,” Mr Wesley, my new history teacher, points at me accusingly. The whole class turns to stare. “Are you going to pay attention to my lesson, or would you like to just daydream all day?”
Lilia sits up in her seat at this, just slightly and watches me carefully. Everyone is looking at me, scrutinising my every move. I’m sure they want me to say something witty or clever, but I don’t know what. Oh God, what should I say? Everything I think of just sounds stupid, and I don’t want to get into trouble on my first proper day. It’s only third period. What kind of a reputation will I get?
It’s too late now anyway. Mr Wesley glares at me fiercely, and I squirm in my seat. This isn’t fun. I think he thinks I was being rude by not answering. I wasn’t. I really wasn’t.
“What’s your name girl?”
“Alyssa Thomson Sir,” I mumble, trying not to make eye contact with him.
“Well Miss Thomson, you’ve just earned yourself a first class ticket to go see Mrs Jackson. I do not tolerate idleness or rudeness in my lessons.”
I nod, and then gaze back down at my book. Everyone’s still looking at me. I don’t know why. Suddenly I realise.
“You want me to go now?”
Mr Wesley sighs impatiently and taps his foot up and down on the dirty grey tiles, “That would be good Miss Thomson.”
I nod again, and gather together my books. I place them in my bag, then pick it up and walk out. I can still feel them all staring at me, even after I can’t see them anymore. I walk out the room staring at my feet, but I can still hear them giggling behind my back.
As I walk down the corridor I wonder what Mrs Jackson will say. I really don’t want to get into trouble. I’ve only been at this school for a day. I’m still in my first lesson. Mum’ll kill me if she finds out.
“Hey Lyss,” a voice calls out to me. I assume it’s talking to me. Am I Lyss? I spin around to see where it’s coming from. There’s no one in the hallway. Am I imagining things?
“God you freak, we’re out here,” the voice says, and I turn to look out the large open windows. Casey and Keela are there sitting on the grass. They’re holding something to their mouths, but I can’t quite make out what it is.
“You coming out or what?” Keela says, a bored expression on her face. I’m not sure she likes me much so far. Maybe I should go out. I know I should really go see Mrs Jackson, but I could always say I got lost. Besides, they’re my only friends at this school. I can’t say no. That would be rude wouldn’t it?
“Um, okay, just a second,” I look both ways down the hall and then throw my bags out the window. The windows are so massive I should be able to fit through really easily. I put my right foot through, take one more glance down the hallway, then climb outside. Picking up my bags, I run over to Keela and Casey. They’re sitting on the grass, under the shade of a big willow tree. I sit down besides them.
“Why aren’t you in class?” Casey asks me, still smoking whatever it is. I smile, trying really hard not to inhale the fumes. Dad’s always telling me about how bad smoking is for you. About how it gives you lung cancer, and then makes you die a horrible slow death.
“I got sent out for being rude. Except I didn’t do anything. I was just daydreaming.” I tell them, still holding my breath. They both look completely disbelieving. “What are you doing?”
Keela and Casey look at each other and smile. It makes me feel quite uneasy.
“Just smoking some weed. You want some?”
I shake my head hurriedly. I can’t take drugs. I know I want friends, but I’m not that stupid. It could kill me.
“Come on, just a bit. It won’t hurt you; it’ll just make you feel more relaxed. Completely harmless.” Keela informs me. She looks so convincing; I wonder whether I should take some. After all, she wouldn’t lie to me about something like that. But even still, I’m not sure.
“No thanks, I’m not in the mood.” The perfect excuse. Now she can’t accuse me of being a wimp. “Maybe another time.”
She shrugs, and passes some more over to Casey. It doesn’t look dangerous at all, but I’ve seen all the health and safety videos at school. People take one puff and then they’re addicted for life.
I hear the buzzer go off faintly from inside the school. I quickly pick up my bag and stand up. Casey and Keela get up too.
“Lunchtime.” Casey says, and starts to walk off with Keela. I don’t move. She turns to me, a questioning look on her face.
“You coming Lyss?”
I grin. Boarding school’s going to be awesome.
Casey
“Why does she have to follow us everywhere?” Lilia whispers. It’s been two days and absolutely nothing has happened. Now it’s fifth period. We have this sort of rule – we have to show up to at least one lesson a day. Lilia’s doing two today. She spent the whole of yesterday at some guys’ house.
“Who?”
She looks at me scornfully. “You know who. Lyss. She’s such a baby.”
“I dunno. She seems allright to me.”
Lilia stares at me like I’m crazy. “What is wrong with you Casey? Usually she’d be another little girl on your list of victims. Like Emma or Becky or any other one of those pathetic children that we don’t like. Why is Alyssa any different?
I’m don’t know what to answer. Luckily Miss Barrett saves me.
“Lilia, I’ve had enough. That’s the third time this lesson I’ve had to tell you to stop talking. Go sit next to Gina.”
Gina looks terrified. If I wasn’t quite so confused I would find it hilarious. But what Lilia just said – it’s stuck itself into my head. Why is she any different to the rest of them? She’s just as small, just as babyish, just as annoying and easy to pick on. So why don’t I want to treat her like the rest of them? She’s such a tool – I could get her to do anything I want. But for some reason I don’t want to. In some strange, unexplainable way, I think I actually like her.
There’s a knock on the door. Without waiting for a reply, Janie Tyler walks in. She’s just about the only girl in this school who isn’t afraid of me. It’s not surprising really, seeing as she’s two years older, and about the size and weight of a sumo wrestler.
“Casey Ashford, you’re wanted in the principal’s office,” she says. I’m sure I can hear the laughter in her voice.
“Why?”
“How should I know? I’m just the messenger. Mrs Jackson just said she needed to see you and Keela Jettison urgently.”
I get to my feet slowly. I really don’t feel like doing this right now. No one’s even looking at me. They’re all so used to seeing me sent out, they’re probably just wondering why Lilia isn’t coming too.
“Hurry up.” Janie snaps at me. I don’t even have the energy to argue
back. I just walk out the room, not even glancing back at the class. The moment I’ve left, the lesson continues on as if nothing ever happened.
I wander down for about a minute before realising that Janie is following me. I sigh and turn to face her. “You can leave me alone now. I am aware of the way to the principals’ office.”
She shakes her head. “Nope. I’m under strict instruction not to let you leave me site. For some reason Mrs Jackson thinks you’re not trustworthy.”
She’s doing that silent laughter thing again, where she’s laughing at me without really laughing. I’m sure she knows what I’ve done to be sent out of class. I can’t work it out. I haven’t done anything that bad recently. Not that Mrs Jackson would know about anyway.
We wander up the hall, Janie still silently laughing at me, me daydreaming of all the possible ways I could get her to shut up.
Strangle her.
Throw her in a river.
Shoot her.
The list is endless. I could quite happily keep going, but we’re outside Mrs Jacksons’ door. I haven’t been here for ages. At least a month. It must’ve been when I set alight to Karina Dhawa’s hair in chemistry. Not my fault. The Bunsen burner just slipped out of my control for a second. She shouldn’t have been in my way. And she shouldn’t have refused to do my work for me.
Janie knocks on the door. I’m surprised she doesn’t smash it to pieces with a fist that size.
“Come in.” Mrs Jackson calls out, and I step inside her office. Janie doesn’t follow. Keela’s already sitting down. I look at her and she shrugs. She knows no more than I do.
“So girls, I’m sure you already know why you’re here.” What an idiot. Do we look like we know?
“Do we look like we know?” Keela asks exactly what I’m thinking. Mrs Jackson smiles gravely.
“No you don’t. And that’s what makes this even worse. The fact that you don’t even know it was the wrong thing to do.”
What the hell is she on about?
“What were you doing third period yesterday?”
Keela looks at me, eyes open wide. I stay completely calm though. If Mrs Jackson thinks she can scare me, she’s even stupider than I thought.
“We were in Geography of course.”
“Really? Because Mr Kingstow said you girls never turned up.”
“We got in a few minutes late and missed register. I had to go to the
bathroom.” I reply. I’m so convincing, it even impresses me.
“Miss Ashford, you two were seen taking cannabis on the school property yesterday during third period.”
“You can’t prove it.”
“You’re right. But if I do manage to prove it, I hope you know that you can go to jail for up to two years for possessing cannabis.”
I don’t say anything. She’s got nothing on us.
“Now as I have no evidence, I will let you girls go with a warning and detention every day for a week. But if I ever catch you girls anywhere near any type of drugs again, you will be expelled. You are free to go.”
We both get up and walk out the room. Just before I close the door, I spin around.
“Mrs Jackson? Who said that they saw us?”
“You know I can’t tell you that Cassandra. Now off to your lesson.”
I shut the door and look at Keela. She has that same revengeful look in her eyes that I’m sure I have in mine.
“I’m going to kill that little bitch.”
Anyway these words are good, because they touch the reader’s heart.