Adam and Eve by:JozueEternal
It all began with light,
Love surrounded the land.
Birds soaring through the skies,
Adam and Eve at last arrive.
They saw what God had done,
All the wonders and gifts.
But what happened next?
Temptation grabbed their necks.
There was a forbidden tree,
Filled with the most precious fruits.
God told them not to get near,
But temptation made them eat,
The fruit of the forbidden tree.
Everything then made no sense,
They had disobeyed the word of God.
They got punished eternally by their mistake.
Then everything began to die,
The flowers, birds and even flies.
Since then temptation has worked cruelly,
Controlling the thoughts of weak minds.
Now with all this pain,
All they feel is regret.
Never disobey the word of God,
Or you’ll end up like one of them.
Love surrounded the land.
Birds soaring through the skies,
Adam and Eve at last arrive.
They saw what God had done,
All the wonders and gifts.
But what happened next?
Temptation grabbed their necks.
There was a forbidden tree,
Filled with the most precious fruits.
God told them not to get near,
But temptation made them eat,
The fruit of the forbidden tree.
Everything then made no sense,
They had disobeyed the word of God.
They got punished eternally by their mistake.
Then everything began to die,
The flowers, birds and even flies.
Since then temptation has worked cruelly,
Controlling the thoughts of weak minds.
Now with all this pain,
All they feel is regret.
Never disobey the word of God,
Or you’ll end up like one of them.
i also like that you have gone against what most teenagers would usually write about and made something religious and seemingly 'uncool' modern and up to date. I think you could go more into the forbidden side of this poem. This is the most interesting bit, it grabs the readers attention. I would also single out the last line of this poem, because it's the moral and presentationally it will draw the readers attention to this bit of the poem. Overall all though a good poem, I like it 
