Crying in the rain

Spoiler

So this is originally a swedish song written and performed by "Newkid" but i translated the lyrics into english and made a few changes... it's not that good I admit but I love the song so... yup.

So this is a translation of a swedish song, it's called "Gråter bara i regnet" which means something like "Crying only in the rain" I won't take credit for this but I love the song so just wanted to share it with you guys


Crying in the rain

I let her in, I let her take,
I let myself believe in all she said.
I was soaring on clouds,
Until she tore me to shreds.

But does it look like I’m mourning you?
More like I’m praising you,
For I will never let myself be weak.

I’m just crying in the rain,
You try to see what I’m thinking;
But you’re trying in vain.

- Why do you stand with me in the rain?
- Why do you tear down my walls?

Baby I’m not insane,
I’m just crying in the rain.

I’ve got it all, don’t want anything more,
Don’t want anything else because I’m hard core.
Take me strong though my lips taste like salt,
I trust nobody and it’s all her fault.

But does it look like I’m angry at you?
More like I’m thanking you,
For I will never let myself be weak.

- Why do you stand with me in the rain?
- Why do you tear down my walls?

Baby I’m not insane,
I’m just crying in the rain.

Hello Demonness,

I believe this would go under 'lyrics' yes? Or if you meant it as a poem then at least under lyric poetry. Or even 'other poetry', anything but dramatic.

In any case I took a look at the original song's English translation (in order to compare/see what you did). Since you didn't give me a title (of the original swedish song), I had to google it. Actually, what I'm looking at is a tumblr post, so nothing even official (for all I know, you wrote the tumblr post). But from the tumblr post and from what you have here, it's too similar. It looks like you translated the song into English, shortened it/rewrote it in a specific form - and you told us as much. But from what I could see, you didn't make much changes to the original work. In any case, the idea is still Newkid's. Even the words, though translated, are still the same. Nothing about the concept, images, or words is changed and this isn't so much a reaction piece, as just a rewriting in a different language and cutting out a few things to make it rhyme in English. I didn't see that you added anything new or anything that is your own. I could be wrong, as I said, for all I know, you wrote the tumblr post.

The point is, the work is still newkid's. I know you mentioned it in the spoiler, but since you need to credit the original author, I wouldn't put it in a spoiler. I would put it at the very top in bold, and I would include not just the author (or band? I'm not sure) but the title of the song as well.

These are just copyright issues/precautions, you might not be aware of it, but it is a serious issue, and one which is better to take precautions than not. I'll be free to explain in greater detail if you have any questions about copyright laws, just pm me.

In any case, this is an amazing piece. I'm glad that you shared it with us, as I for one, do not know Swedish and would have never come across it. But it's in the wrong place and doesn't have the correct attributions. Dramatic poetry forum is meant for original works that fit under the category and this is neither, so you can see why this is problematic.

~ As Always Audy

Good job, keep it up

I've got no comments towards this poem. everything seems to be ok, no grammar mistakes seen as I read through the stanzas. This is the most sad poem I've read so far. is this a true story or did you write it out of nowhere?