Blade-Song

Sing to me,
My sweet, sweet blade,
And tell me of
Calm Death's fair trade.

Paint me a picture,
A splatter of red,
Take me away
From what they've said.

Cutting words,
Slicing deep--
The pain you've sown,
I now must reap.

I really like this It's short and to the point (literally )
"Paint me a picture,
A splatter of red," <-- My favorite part.
The words you use are very descriptive. I get a clear picture in my head of what you are trying to tell us. It's fantastic!
It flows very well due to the rhyming, and I think you did a very good job of this. It is very difficult to write a poem that rhymes, since it restricts your word choice. But I like the way you did this
Keep writing! It's really GrEaT

Hey Pyro!

I really enjoyed this. A lot better then cutter's poems I could write! You did a very good job!

And tell me of
Calm Death's fair trade.

Fair? How so? Also calm? Explain that.

Cutting words,
Slicing deep--
The pain you've sown,
I now must reap.

Favorite part!

You are VERY talented writer. Nicely done!

Pm me or post on my wall if you have any questions!

-Boo

Suddenly not so much of a hopeless romantic. Okay. Well, let's see what we can do here.
You have the flow down perfectly-- each word rolls into the next and right off the tongue. I like that aspect of the piece; however you're also tied up in cliches throughout the majority of this poem, so the lack of originality is somewhat of a distraction in my opinion. Other than that, though, I like this a lot. Sorry for such a short review.

Spoiler

I hope you're not being too hard on yourself, sir. You know that time (whatever that is) eventually heals. and if this has nothing to do with what I'm talking about, disregard this spoiler.

Hey pyro,

I haven't reviewed in a while, so excuse my forseen roughness! This was fantastic! As AwsomeSocks said, short and too-the-point. You've done a great job with the rhyming - it works very well, yet doesn't make the work seem childish. It also creates good balance for the piece - the dark and bloody description of the blade balances out with the smooth, flowing rhyme.

Great stuff!
Miyakko

Take me away
From what they've said.

What I got: Words really can hurt, whoever said that sticks and stones bit. Didn't know what the hell they were talking about. Words can be more scarring then hits, I would rather have my bones broken then live with the cruel words of someone hateful. I liked this although a bit short but it made it's impact.