Death

Spoiler

I know that the title is a little clique, but I don't really have anything better, so if you don't like it, just tell me.

Death

Death is a barrier, a wall
One that we always come to
One that we cannot avoid
One that we forget about until we see it

Death is a separation, a rift
One we cannot cross
One that is always around us
One beyond our imagination

Death is a carnivore, a beast
One impossible to escape
One that always pursues
One always behind us, waiting

Death comes to everyone
Some, it ignores for the moment
Some, it takes for its own
There are many who greatly fear it

Do you?

hey frnd.....liked your poem...won't be gng for a question and answer.....but just wanna suggest in one of your lines.....in the opening line "death ia a barrier, a wall '.........you could have make it more reflective by writing ' death is nothing but, a dear end'.......and in the fourth line "one we forget about til it covers us in its embrace"...rest you have depicted a true picture of death by your lines...all the best to you....looking forward for your new writings........

I kind of like the title. 'Death' it's eye-catching but you could add another word or maybe an adjective to it. I think the poem is a translation of the word death. It was a good idea, though. What I liked:
- The desciption.
- The fact that it relates to reality.
- The last two words (they gave me goose bumps!!).
I advice you to keep on writing and try harder everytime.

First off, title works just fine. Second, you've written a very lovely poem here. Know for some criticism!

One thing i noticed is that at the end of every line, you lack punctuation. Whether or not you ment to, I would strongly advise you to think about incorporating more punctuation. Many poems work better without it, and this maybe one of those, and maybe it's not. Punctuation helps assert lines more strongly, and changes the flow, and this poem works well without it. Just a thought. Up to you.

Besides that i have no other criticism, so well done!

Keep Writing!
arspoetica

Death. An interesting subject.

I'm an avid fan of literature that takes on such a deep matter simply because it is something that people fear. It is the ultimate unknown. Many different aspects have been given about death but no one wants to die. At least, no one who is in their right state of mind. The will to live makes it very hard for someone to be able to accept it and to talk about it, even.

So for that, I respect you.

On a poetic standpoint, I felt like this was more of a rant then anything else. A thought process. In that sense, you have a great piece of structure. The starting of something that could be brilliant. The problem being, there is nothing really poetic about this.

So, what I want you to do is to go back and think. Think about way of introducing metaphor and imagery. Poetic devices. Things that will make this feel as much as it tells. Poetry should not be like prose in that sense, though prose can take on a poetic feel. Poetry is different and should be thought of as such.

Add flesh to this. If you can do that, you have my respect.

~Walker

This is great I like the repetition of the word "one" in the first three stanzas. It gave it some nice rhythm.
"Death is a carnivore, a beast" <-- this was my favorite comparison
The question at the end was cool!
Overall, a fantabulous poem, even if a little morbid... but I suppose most poems are like that Keep writing! I love your work!