Exile

Disclaimer: Another poem where the title doesn't quite fit the content, but it just might make sense. It's a metaphorical thing, you'll see.

Remnants of what will never be again.
You don't believe me.
You have deceived me.
A cruel intention for a past mistake
That never went away completely.

Every day I feel betrayal from within.
Another regret
I can't forget.
A constant scar that I wear on my heart
that never went away completely.

How could you do this to me?
Waiting for the moment
when I get to see.
But, still you leave me...

In exile
(and leave a lie)
Yes, it's true
I still think of you
and I never wanted....
To be exiled
(another lie)
I let it go, but now you
constantly are turning me away....
Into exile
(Reveal the lie)
Overwhelmed by the feeling that
I won't get through to you this time.
The tension is just killing me.

My obsession with you
surfaces again.
I try to hide it.
I can't deny it.
I guess I knew it all along
inside, you never forgave me completely.

My new perception of you
makes me hate you more.
I speak sincerely.
You won't hear me.
A final plea
for the answer I seek
that will deliver me completely

Hatred is building in me.
Waiting for the moment
when I get to see....

See you die!
In exile!
(I leave a lie)
Yes it's true,
I really hate you
Is this what you wanted,
to be exiled?
(I live a lie)
I tried to help you,
now I just want this to go away...
Into exile
(Forgive the lie)
I know I will not
recover this time.
The tension is just killing me.

I realize
that forgiveness means everything. (it means nothing)
I realize
that I betrayed your trust in me. (Do you trust me?)
I realize
only the truth will set you free. (Why did you lie to me?)

This has gone on too long.
I want no more mind games.
Why can't you make up your mind?
The anticipation's killing me.

Don't want to be here
in exile...
(with all your lies)
Don't leave me waiting
in exile....
(You live a lie)
Don't want to die
in exile....
(You are a lie)

Interesting poem. Commanded my attention from beginning to end, no wavering.

The line and stanza breaks are excellent - they allow the words to let through the spirit of the speaker, as well as creating a natural flow of speech. The one thing that bothered me was the little bit of rhyming at the beginning, before the flow was firmly established. However, this blended into what followed well so it was and is quite okay.
The repetition is nice, and together with the parentheses the echo effect created adds to the haunting/haunted nature of the poem.

Overall, great piece.

Wow. This is indeed quite a haunting piece, greg925, and is very well put together - It held my attention from start to finish. The first and second stanzas are probably my favourite - they are very cleverly worded. Personally, I quite liked the rhyming at the beginning, and I loved how it all blended together. I agree with the previous reviewer's thoughts on the parentheses and the echo effect they create. I have not a single grammar or spelling nitpick for you, so good job!
Highly original and very well done.
Congrats!