Sun:Ocean

I like it a lot, a lot of images in a short poem. One thing:

Leaving wet foot prints as battle scaring.

Scarring? Scars? Also footprints is usually one word.

There's a cool mix of rhyme schemes in this one. The first stanza is very, very good. The couplet at the end reminds me of ye olde English poetry: simple but appealing to the reader. I think you should add to this! If you wanted to, that is lol put some more in the middle! Anyway, nice job

I like the poem, but I don't think you should end two lines in a row with sleep. My favorite line was Threatening the moist air with a heat monster. In the title, there should probably be a space between sun and ocean.

Hello there. You have a really good rhythm for about two lines. And those lines were in the middle. I think what you're getting at is good but the stanzas were a bit messy. First you had this large chunk of words and then you had two smaller stanzas, all three with different rhythms, throwing it off kilter a bit. I'd try to seperate it a bit more, even out your stanzas, and then add a bit more to it. I think this is a beautiful idea. I mean.. think about it. When I read this I really thought about the idea of sunlight reflecting off of the surface of the ocean. I thought about swimming up and seeing the light bouncing around me beneath the water, and its a really beautiful thing to imagine. But sadly, I had to imagine that on my own without help from the poem. MAKE YOUR READERS FEEL SOMETHING. Give them something to chew on, something that'll leave a taste in their mouth that they can't get rid of. Something that will have an impact.

Descriptions, length, rhythm.

Overall, it needs a touch of work. But I definitely want to review again if you decide to change anything. It has loads of potential.