Darkness Awakens

Unseen monsters creeping under your bed,
Hungry, gleaming eyes watching your every move,
Winged menaces fluttering through the thick, cold mist,
Furry, fanged creatures crouching on your rooftop,
The night has fallen-darkness awakens.

Neon street-lights flickering uncannily,
Heavy, grave footsteps marching past,
Muffled screams echoing to escape eternity,
Shadows gathering under a golden, crescent moon,
The night has fallen-darkness awakens.

Soulless spirits hovering about,
Unheard music sweeping across your room,
Mysteries knocking to unveil at your door step,
Endless nightmares ripping your well earned sleep,
The night has fallen-darkness awakens.

The images you presented me in this poem were good. The only problem I can see is that all it consists of are somewhat abstract images suspended in a timeless, placeless world. I see too much use of -ing words, and would like it if you changed the tense of much of this poem from the present to the past (or future, maybe?) Also, though not a requisite by any means, this poem doesn't seem to tell or show me why it exists. Otherwise, I did like the images you showed me, even lacking the frame of reference.

Brian

Frankly, what Brian was saying what that it had beautiful images but no point. It's almost like it's half finished. you can make it twice more meaningful by adding a theme - something that makes us think "wow"

thank you; even i don't thinbk this poem has anything else than the atmosphere!!