Five Poems That Start With "S" - Skin

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Skin
Skin is a wonderfully diverse thing.
It can be red or pink or brown or yellow.
It can range from smooth and soft to scaly and rough.
And it protects all sorts of things.
Apples, Bananas, Humans and animals.
And when you peel it,
It reveals all the goodness that’s inside.
All the yummy deliciousness that takes some time to find.
So when you see someone or something and feel repulsed,
Remember, you’re only seeing skin deep.
May all your bacon BURN! ~Calcifer "Howl's Moving Castle"




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Hey Rose!
I liked the gneral idea of this poem. but I don't like the way you present it. What I mean is, I don't like your voice. You sound like a salesman on an infomercial. I feel like if you took this poem deeper and put more emotion into this, you could reall reach out to your readers and reel them in. My first suggestion is to change up some of the "it"s. "It can be", "It can range", "it reveals"; all these things make your poem sound very distant and impersonal.
Hope I could help. Keep up the good work!
-Alex
Need reviews?
I'd be happy to give them.
http://www.youngwriterssociety.com/topic76104.html




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Hey Rose :) I liked this poem and the points you included in it. I liked the part about all the different colors and things it protects. People often forget alot of other things have skin too!

you're only seeing skin deep


I liked this part of the poem because it's true; a lot of people forget about the things inside of the skin, like the personality or the brain on the person! Hope this helped you to know that you have a thing for poems :) Keep writing!

Writing is a haven. Writing is a solitude. Writing is a passion.

-- Delanie Heart



Between living and dreaming there is a third thing. Guess it.
— Antonio Machado