Snowflake Samba Haiku

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elizajoe
Gender Female
Points 1040
Reviews 24
Wed Jan 26, 2011 8:59 pm
elizajoe says... · Wed Jan 26, 2011 8:59 pm
Dainty, lacy flakes
Floating down from up above
Dance through wintry skies.

Alone in their world
They twist and waltz through the clouds
To the wind's music.

Dressed in icy gowns
Edged with most exquisite lace
Nature's queen design.

Yes, I know it's not a traditional haiku.
It started with the first stanza, but then I came back to it and wrote the other two.
I am a traveler coming to a crossroads
Searching for a signpost
But realizing there isn't one.

I am baby bird in the nest
Eager to taste the freedom of the skies
But afraid to jump
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pointe2mikko
Gender None specified
Points 940
Reviews 4
Wed Jan 26, 2011 9:21 pm
pointe2mikko says... · Wed Jan 26, 2011 9:21 pm
I really like you haiku, and it follows perfectly the rules of a traditional haiku:
Poem of 3 lines,
5, 7, and 5 again
No rhyme.

And it talks of nature! Love it. Look I even wrote a haiku on a haiku.

Keep 'em coming! :)
All your scars won't heal till you let go
You're perfectly worth it, forget your mistakes.
If you wanna fly, leave this world with me
We'll touch the sky, let's defy this gravity.

SparkOfDoubt and Mikko's joint account!
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brokeninpieces
Gender Female
Points 1040
Reviews 15
Thu Jan 27, 2011 4:05 pm
brokeninpieces says... · Thu Jan 27, 2011 4:05 pm
I love it! The last part was my favorite. And it doesn't matter if it was more than one haiku put together, it just makes it original. I love it though, especially your imagery and just the way you put it together.
In the end, love always wins.
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