Humanity

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Simple. True.
Deadly. Cruel.
Enchanting. Dark.
Broken hearts.

Dehumanized. Degraded
Incredibly hated.
Starved. Beaten.
Stripped. Weakened.

Nazi members.
With hate to their core.
Jewish people.
With no more.

Stolen. Pushed.
Shaved. Hung.
Millions slaughtered,
How had it begun?

Hitler's Hate?
Stalin's Greed?
Dr. Mengele's sick Obsession?

Night calls, and death hits close.
Darkness thrives,
But only in the ones who are wicked.
Not in the conflicted.

Liberated. Free.
Humanitarism. Glee.
Fed. Clothed.
Reunited. Peace.
Tranquillity.



Dedicated to the victims of the holocaust. May it never happen again.
Last edited by snickerdooly on Sun Feb 27, 2011 1:21 am, edited 1 time in total.
"Characters cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, ambition inspired, and success achieved." Helen Keller




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Points 605
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Well done! Keep it up.
Overall, I really enjoyed it. The 6th stanza seems to lose a little bit of the flow, but if it's considered needed, as is, for the sense of the poem, then keep it! (watch out for small spelling errors that detract from the message).
Great job overall




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Wow, a really powerful piece.
I love the structure of it and it brings back lots of good views that some may have forgotten. Its a really good subject to touch upon too, it stops people from recalling false memories.
An amazing piece of poetry.
Well done!
...The Emptiness Will Haunt You...




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OH MY GOD!!!! we just read about Nazism and your poem was kind of an overview of the complete chapter..... it was deeply heart-touching....gonna leave its mark!!!!
The answers lie within.. You only need to look.. :)




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It was enchanting and dark and caught my aye because of it's abnormalty.
Nella vita vi è la distruzione, desolazione nella morte, ma c'è speranza nella rivoluzione.




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Hey snickerdooly,

Wow! I love this poem so much! I love it's unique style, you've brought a new, different, but impacting style to the table of poetry. I thought the single-word sentences were a fantastic idea. It really pointed out those particular words and helps us readers to think more about their meaning. They're words that mean so much, and it's great that you've used them so well. It still had a nice rhythm to it, which suprised me, I admit.

Wonderful work! Best wishes for future writing!

RedLeaf




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This is a good poem! The holocaust sucked, I agree. There are parts where your rhyming seems forced and the rhythm needs a little smoothing out. Most of your periods are unnecessary or should be commas. Other than that, I have two tiny nitpicks: Third stanza, "slaughtered". Last stanza, space between the period and tranquility.

Hope I helped!

>>Annie<<
Ideas don't stay in heads very long because they don't like solitary confinement.




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Wow your really good. I love this poem.It really caught my intrest. Its captivating and dark. I also though it was rather unique. Very well done. =)



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