First, before anyone reads this poem I would like to take a moment to dedicate this to my uncle who killed himself last year after thirty years of loneliness and sorrow. The story in this poem originates from truth. My uncle saw his girlfriend murdered when he was 16 at the edge of a river after they had spent the entire day there. He was also shot, but was not killed. He told me the story on many occasions, but I only recently found out that after the attack he murdered the man who killed her and several others who were his cohorts who raped several women during that time.
Vivid memories of Summer
swim through my mind as I Fall.
Nights with her,
away from reality,
were the best of my life.
Lying in the country heat
under the stars with the moon
by the glimmering river
brought clarity to my
clouded mind.
I felt true love.
My heart longed for her
when we were apart,
beating frantically when she was gone.
And even still when we were together
it beat ever faster.
We were anxious yet at peace.
We knew no evil.
All we needed was each other.
All we had was each other.
Those months in nature,
away from hardship,
away from politics,
made me grow.
How I viewed the world changed.
I taught and learned.
I listened instead of hearing.
I observed instead of merely seeing.
I became entwined with her,
and she with me as our
hearts ascended to the
heavens together.
I loved her,
beyond my own being,
above my own mind,
above my family
for she understood me.
She accepted fully what I was
and did not turn away.
She grasped so fully what
others could not.
Those days were perfect,
but our time together ended.
On a beautiful August morning,
after a night of sheer ecstasy.
My mind so clearly sees the scene:
Her haunting beauty,
the weeping willows whistling
as the wind blew her dirty blonde
hair about.
The morning sun slowly rising.
The still,
glistening river beside us that
was our home
And a demon who took her from me.
I can still hear the shattering of silence,
the vibrations of the barrel as he fired
and death ripped her from my arms,
stealing away all that was
important in my life.
In her death I died.
As life left those beautiful blue eyes
and blood spilled from her
perfect body
I saw my humanity fade.
I saw my heart crash to the ground
and break in the dirt,
leaving nothing but as shell.
My world disintegrated.
I became animal.
All that is left in me is bitterness.
All feeling in me has turned to hatred.
Even with him dead,
his corpse lying broken,
beaten,
battered,
tortured,
and abused I have no repose.
Some since of relief came after his
death, but justice
will never truly be served.
I now hunt those like I,
like the one who destroyed
all compassion in me.
I seek only to destroy that which I became.
From my wounds I will never heal,
I will only grow more sorrowful.
The will only on expand to infinity.
I have no hope,
but in my hopelessness
I have grown still.
Until my dying breathe I will hunt,
and prey on the predators
for all those who have watched
those they love die right before them
For the victims whose lives were taken
without reason
And for me.
